"Jen had a scare last spring. Turned out to be fine, but she bought like five boxes. I'm sure she has some left."
"A scare? What are you talking about?"
"Found one!" She takes out a box and hands it to me.
I laugh. "A pregnancy test? Why are you giving me this?"
"You need to take it. Now. I'll wait outside."
"Giada, I'm not pregnant. I haven't had sex in forever."
"You didn't have sex with Brad?" she asks, sounding surprised.
"Well, yeah, but—"
"Just take the test."
I roll my eyes. "I'm not pregnant."
"Prove it." She looks down at the box.
"Giada, this is crazy. I'd know if I was pregnant."
"How would you know? You've never been pregnant before, have you?"
"Well, no, but I know the signs."
"And you have them, or at least some of them."
"They would've showed up before now. Brad and I had sex over a month ago."
"The signs can show up any time. Every woman is different. Did you guys use protection?"
"No, but I'm on the pill."
"And you actually take it? Like every day?"
"Not always. I'm not great at remembering it. But that doesn't mean I'm pregnant."
"Did you get your period this month?"
I stop to think. "Um, no. I guess I didn't."
Shit. I'm starting to get nervous. Why didn't I get my period? I've been so preoccupied with Brad leaving and not knowing what would happen with us that I didn't even think about my period not showing up.
"Go." She shoves me into the bathroom and shuts the door. "I'll be right outside."
There's no way I'm pregnant. Sure I missed a couple pills, but not enough to make it not work. Honestly, I don't know if that's true, but missing a few pills shouldn't make someone pregnant. Penny, one of the stylists at the salon, said it took her eight months to get pregnant after being on the pill, so there's no way missing a few could result in pregnancy.
"Done yet?" Giada yells through the door.
"Haven't started," I yell back.
She's not going to let me out of here until I do this, so I take out the stick and do the test, then read the instructions while I wait.
Giada knocks on the door. "How's it going?"
"I'm waiting."
"Want me to wait with you?"
I open the door. "Giada, I'm not pregnant."
"Is that what it said?"
"It's not done yet, but I already know."
"What if you were?"
"I'm not."
She looks down at the stick in my hand. "Actually, you are."
I raise the stick to eye level and see the two lines telling me it's true. But it can't be. There's no way.
"You said these are old, right?" I ask, holding up the stick.
"They're not old. She bought them last spring."
"That's months ago. They're probably expired by now."
"I don't think they expire, but just to be sure, we'll get new ones. We'll go to the store right now."
I toss the stick in the trash. "It's probably just old."
"Riley." Giada is standing at the door, a sad smile on her face.
"What?"
"You never answered my question. What if you really are pregnant? What are you going to do?"
"Giada, it's not true. That test is wrong. Those things are always wrong."
"But what if it's not? What are you going to do?"
"I..." I look around the room, as if the answers are somehow there. "I don't know. I guess...I don't know."
"Let's go. We'll get a new test and come right back."
She has to grab my arm and pull on me to get out of there. I'm in a fog, not sure if this is real or some strange dream. How could I be pregnant? While on the pill?
We get the test and go back to her apartment and I try it again. There are two sticks in the package, so I do them both.
"So?" Giada asks as I open the bathroom door.
"Same," I mutter as it hits me that this is really happening.
"You're pregnant," she says.
I nod.
She hugs me. "I want to say congratulations, but I don't know if that's the right thing to say. You don't seem very happy."
"I don't know what I'm feeling. I can't believe this is happening." I pull away from her and walk down the short hallway to the living room like I'm in a trance.
"Riley?" I hear Giada say from behind me.
"I'm pregnant." I turn to face her. "With Brad's baby."
"When are you going to tell him?"
"I don't know if I will."
"Riley, you have to tell him. He needs to know he's going to be a dad."
"If I tell him, he'll never go to med school. It's his dream. It's what he's always wanted. It was almost taken away from him, but he got it back. I can't take it away again."
"He can still go to school."
"But he won't. He wouldn't go if he knew we were having a baby. He'd want to be with me. He'd get a job to support us and then..." My voice trails off.
"Riley, that's not a bad thing. I know it's not what he planned, but maybe this baby is a sign you two were meant to be together. You finding this out right before he leaves? Maybe it means he should stay."
"Getting that scholarship was a sign. A sign telling him he belongs in school. That he needs to be a doctor. Live his dream."
"What about your dream?"
"I never really had one."
"Everyone has one."
"That's what Brad said too when I told him that. He wouldn't let it go, so I told him, but it's stupid. It's not even a dream. Not really."
"What did you tell him?"
"I said I want to have a family someday. And live in a small house on the beach."
"The beach?" She smiles. "You never told me you like the beach."
"I've never been. But I've seen pictures, and I think I'd like it. Brad used to say he'd take me, but...it doesn't matter." I look down at my stomach. "If this is really happening, then I just have to accept that this is my life. Here in this town."
"It doesn't have to be. You can do whatever you want. Having a baby doesn't change that."
"You sound just like Brad. He used to tell me to just go for it. To go after my dreams no matter what."
I smile, thinking back to that day. The day we talked about our dreams. My whole life, I'd never talked about my dreams because I never thought they'd come true, but Brad made me think that they could.
"So why can't you?" Giada asks. "You don't have to stay here. If you want to go live on a beach, then do it."
"I can't just pack up and leave, especially now."
"Riley, stop it." She holds onto my arms and looks me in the eye. "Stop saying you can't when you can. Staying here? Living here with your mom? That doesn't have to be your life. Or your baby's life."