“No. Yes. No.” Amanda groaned. “I don’t even know anymore. He wasn’t before. I mean before yesterday. But it felt like he was yesterday. And I reacted badly. I really don’t know what happened. I never lose my temper that way.”
“Well, Robert has a particular talent for making people snap. But I swear I don’t think he intended it. He feels really bad about it today.”
“Does he?” Maybe she sounded a little bit needy, but that wasn’t something she could help. She really wanted to know.
“Yes. He does.”
“He’s not annoyed with me? Or thinking I’m some hysterical, insecure idiot who—?”
“Amanda, stop. You’re being stupid. He feels bad. I don’t know exactly what happened, but anyone with a brain would know that he must be mostly to blame for it. You’re normally the most sensible, levelheaded person I know.”
Amanda leaned back in her chair, smiling and internally cringing at the same time. “I don’t feel sensible or levelheaded lately. I feel really stupid. But I feel bad about it too. So I should probably give him a call and apologize for the unfortunate champagne-throwing incident.”
Taylor laughed. “That wouldn’t be out of line.”
“Or maybe I’ll just send him a text.”
“That would be okay too.”
“We might as well get things settled in some way. We’re going to keep seeing each other around.” Amanda was reminding herself of that truth as much as she was telling Taylor. “If only at all these endless weddings. He’s going to Michelle’s wedding next weekend. Down at Hilton Head.”
“What? The one on the yacht? Why is he going to that wedding? She didn’t get to invite most of us from school because the guest list is so small. And he’s got no connection to Michelle.”
“I know.” Amanda groaned, cringing about the upcoming event, which she could foresee would be either awkward or painful. “But I guess he’s good friends with Michelle’s fiancé. The man is like fifteen years older than Michelle, and he and Robert went to grad school together. So he’s going to be there. And I’m going to be there. And I won’t have the normal safety net of all our normal people around. I’m seriously considering telling Michelle I’ve taken deathly ill.”
“I’m sure that’s tempting, but you’re a bridesmaid and you’d never shirk your duty that way. I’m glad you’re going to be there since most of us from school aren’t able to go. Why did she feel the need to get married on a yacht? And so far away?”
“It’s not that far.”
“It’s six hours, isn’t it?”
“Yes. A little longer, actually. I’m having to take Friday off from work so I can drive down in time for the rehearsal dinner. It’ll be fine. I’d just be happier if Robert wasn’t going to be there.”
“Well, I guess he will be. And you’re going to reach out to settle things between you guys before then anyway. Right?”
Amanda made a moderately affirming sound.
“Right?” Taylor prompted again.
“Yes. Right. I will. I promise. I’ll text him.”
“Today.”
“Tonight.”
“Okay. Fine. Tonight.”
“I’ll do it. And I’ll let you know when I do. But I’m not sure why I’m the recipient of this lecture. Maybe you should give it to Robert.”
“I already did,” Taylor told her just before she hung up.
Amanda shook her head at her phone and then put it down so she could fold another T-shirt. She’d gotten three more done before her doorbell rang.
Almost no one stopped by her town house. The most likely reason for an unexpected visitor was a package she needed to sign for. So she got up and glanced down at herself before she walked to the door.
She had on leggings and a T-shirt. She wasn’t wearing a bra, but hopefully her T-shirt was roomy enough to hide the fact. She certainly wasn’t going to race to her room to put on a bra for a deliveryman.
When she glanced out the window by the door to check who it was, she froze.
Robert.
Wearing khakis and a dark blue crewneck.
Standing right there on her doorstep.
She couldn’t move for several seconds. She had no idea what she should do. What the hell was he even doing here?
“Can you please open the door for a minute?” he said just then. He must have seen her through the window. “I don’t have to come in.”
She took a ragged breath and turned the knob, pulling the door open and staring at him through the storm door before she opened that one too.
His eyes ran up and down her body quickly before they returned to her face. He didn’t look angry or annoyed or unsettled or upset. Or particularly contrite.
He mostly just looked quiet.
“Sorry to just show up like this,” he said. “I kept trying to call, but it felt off somehow. So I finally just came over.”
“That’s okay. I was going to call you today anyway.” Then some instinct caused her to add, “Or text or something.”
He nodded. Opened his mouth but then closed it again. He shifted his weight slightly before he began. “So here’s the thing. I’m sorry. For being an ass. For everything. I promise I wasn’t trying to be. I’m sure you won’t believe me, but I thought I was making things easier. By keeping a little distance. But I’ve thought about it and thought about it, and I realize I was just making things easier for myself.”
She stared at him. She wasn’t sure what she expected from him in this moment, but it wasn’t this kind of blunt, honest confession.
His lips curled wryly before he continued, “I’ve had casual sex all my life, and it’s never been difficult because I don’t usually see the women afterward. I try to leave things in a decent place, but our social circles rarely overlap the way yours and mine do. So it felt awkward to me. Uncomfortable. And I handled it the way I always do—by creating some distance. I told myself I was being mature and responsible about the whole thing, but I was mostly just taking the easy way out. So I’m sorry about that.”
His eyes dropped from her face to the stoop for a few seconds before they rose again. “The truth is I had an amazing time with you. And I think you’re... amazing overall. And the last thing I’d want to do is make you feel like I don’t appreciate you.” He cleared his throat and dropped his eyes again. “Because I do.”
She stared at him, frozen like she’d been when she first saw him out the window. Her mouth felt dry and her palms felt damp.
Her silence evidently lasted a little too long because he shifted from foot to foot and gave a half-hearted scowl. “Are you going to say anything?”
“Yes,” she burst out, finally finding her voice. “I was just shocked. I’m not used to getting such good apologies from guys.”
“Well, it was real. I meant it.” His shoulders relaxed visibly. “So it was a good apology?”
“Don’t get cocky about it,” she told him with an eye roll. “But yes. It was a nice one. And thank you for it. And I’m sorry for losing my temper. I shouldn’t have done it. It was a supreme overreaction to circumstances. If you want the truth, I was feeling weird about everything too. And then when it felt like you were avoiding me, I took it as an insult rather than thinking it through reasonably. I don’t normally lose my temper like that, so I’m not sure what got into me.”