And people said girls were dramatic? Guys. Were. Idiots. “Whatever happened, you need to make it right.”
He cut her a sharp glare and looked back at the road again. “Sometimes there is no fixing things. Once you cross that line you can’t go back.”
“Cross the line? What line? What did you—”
“How do you know I did anything?”
She gave him a look.
“He caught me with Emmaline,” he admitted in a rush of words, as though he was annoyed with her for making him say it. “I’d appreciate it if you kept that to yourself, too. I could do without the gossip . . . and I’d like to protect Emmaline from it. You know what assholes people can be.”
She stared at him in silence for a few long moments. “Wow. I mean, I had a feeling that you were into her, but your best friend’s sister? You actually went there. I don’t know whether to be impressed or horrified.”
“Well, everyone else is horrified,” he sneered. “Because I’m that big of a douche.”
“Everyone who?”
“Oh, Nolan. Mrs. Martin . . . they walked in on us.”
“Just . . . wow.” She whistled and shook her head. “Like I said though. Not surprising.”
“And why is that?”
“Because I’ve seen the way she looks at you.”
He stared ahead, silent for several moments, until he sent her a quick glance and grudgingly asked, “And what way is that?”
She laughed lightly. “Idiot. It’s the same way you look at her.”
He trained his gaze back on the road, his fingers tapping away on the steering wheel. “I guess it must be the same way you and Nolan have been looking at each other.”
That silenced her. She pressed her lips into a flat line.
He chuckled beside her. “Who’s the idiot now?”
Lesson #31
Don’t overanalyze. Nothing kills the mood faster.
x Nolan x
Everyone assumed Nolan’s bad mood had to do with his breakup with Priscilla, which was weird considering he hadn’t thought much of her these last couple days. And yet it was easier to let people think the obvious rather than explain the complicated truth. The fact that both Nolan and Beau had bruised faces added to the speculation. No one came close to guessing the truth, of course. Rumors circulated. Most people believed they got into a fight with some guys from a rival school. No one suspected their fight was with each other.
The truth was no one’s business anyway.
Not that there was anyone he could confide in, since the people he felt closest to—Beau, his sister, and, yeah, Hayden—happened to be unavailable.
Emmaline was avoiding him, taking the bus in the mornings. He wasn’t sure how she was getting home. When she wasn’t at his car at the end of the day on Monday, he’d texted her and gotten back a terse reply that she had a ride home. For all he knew that ride was Beau. He decided to let the matter drop. He wasn’t in the mood for that battle and he knew it would be an all-out war if he pushed her on it.
Emmaline wasn’t the only one avoiding him.
He didn’t see Hayden at the usual times and places. They often intersected between sixth and seventh periods, but not this week. She must have been taking a different route.
Beau couldn’t avoid him quite so easily. They had two classes together, as well as athletics. They saw each other, but no words were exchanged.
When had his life turned into such a mess? He had always prided himself on having his shit together. No drama. No fireworks. He was stable and reliable.
Guess he was just as screwed up as everyone else, after all.
With that grim and somewhat sobering realization, he decided to try and mend at least one of his fractured relationships.
He’d start with Hayden. Somehow, he felt like if he had her in his life he might be able to manage all the rest.
He wasn’t sure when he would get around to talking to Beau. That pain, that betrayal, was still too fresh. He would make things right with Emmaline, of course. Eventually, but inevitably. She was his sister and he loved her. That would never change.
Nolan tossed his backpack and gym bag in the back seat of his truck and headed for Hayden’s neighborhood. He passed Beau’s street, but didn’t turn. He wasn’t ready to look into his best friend’s face and think about the things he had done to his sister—with her. Undoubtedly, it was the same thing Beau had done to countless girls. And that only pissed him off all over again.
Would any guy be ready to forgive his friend for something like that? He knew how Beau operated. The girls he used. The girls whose numbers he always seemed to lose once he was done with them. There was a reason why people called him a player. It was always a game. Never serious.
Hayden’s vehicle was parked in front of her house. Good. She was home. He parked behind her car and headed up the front walkway. He knocked on the door and then buried his hands in his front pockets, waiting in the chilly air, feeling suddenly self-conscious.
She did that to him. Twisted him up in knots. Made him feel less than confident. She made him think. Made him think too much. Yes, there was such a thing. She’d made him look deeply at himself. He’d never had that with Priscilla. Priscilla had given him comfort. Hayden challenged him and made him want to be a better person.
Everyone always told him he was a good person, applauding him for stepping up when his dad died. He never understood that. What else was he supposed to do? Fall apart? Be a burden on the rest of his family?
Hayden was the first person in his life who made him question himself and his motives. She held up a mirror to his face and showed him that he wasn’t the perfect person everyone always praised him for being. She saw more than the great son, great brother, great student, great athlete, great friend, everyone always told him he was. It was all great . . . bullshit.
The guy from the other night opened the door—Alex, he thought, Hayden’s mom’s friend.
“Hey there, man.” The guy held up his fist for Nolan to bump like they were old friends.
He swallowed back his distaste and asked, “Is Hayden home?”
“Ah, yeah. I think she’s getting ready for work.” He stepped back and shouted through the house, “Hayden! You got company, sweet cheeks!”
Nolan winced. The guy really was a douchebag.
Hayden emerged, looking like she would enjoy hitting her mother’s boyfriend. She paused as her gaze turned on Nolan, and that expression on her face didn’t even alter one tiny bit. Great. He was in the same class as this creep? That did not bode well for him.
Without a word, she strode out onto the front porch. Nolan took it upon himself to close the front door in Alex’s face. He followed Hayden to the end of the porch, where she waited for him with her arms across her chest.
“Hi.”
She gave him a disgusted look. “You came over here to say hi? I don’t have time for hellos. I’m going to be late for work.”
“I want to talk to you. About the other night. I’m sorry about the way things went down—”
“What are you doing here, Nolan?”
Frustration crept into his voice. “I’m trying to get things right—”
“Really? You shouldn’t be worrying about me. I don’t matter.”