Everyone that is except for Cletus Winston, he called her “wife.”
But back to Genie Lee, her question, and her small, teasing, expectant smile. I imagined she’d asked the question figuring she already knew what I’d say. I’d say what I always said, and that would be a lie. Lucky—or unlucky, depending on how you reckoned things—for Genie, I didn’t feel much like lying.
So I took a step closer to her and said, “Actually, yes, Genie. I’m having a bad day. I’m glad you asked.”
Her smile fell and her eyebrows formed two arches of surprise on her forehead. “You—”
“It’s been a bad, bad day. Yesterday we had that car crash, and I’m still feeling sick about it. I’m sure you’ve already heard. And today we had another unexpected tragedy—I’m not allowed to discuss it, but it’s weighing heavy on my mind—and I feel like I can’t take a deep breath, you know?” I breathed in, attempting to demonstrate what I meant. “Sometimes I feel like, what is the point? Every day, folks ignoring posted speed signs, doing drugs, hurting their loved ones, getting themselves into trouble, making bad choices. And I want them to stop. I want them to make good decisions for themselves and their families. I want them to stop being so careless and thoughtless. But there’s nothing I can do. And so, yeah. I’m having a bad day.”
Genie gaped at me, her eyes wide and worried. “Oh, Jackson.”
“But it’s okay.” I lifted a hand, waving away her worry. “I’m feeling a little down about it, it feels like a lot today. But tomorrow is a new day, right?” I took a step back, giving her a small, optimistic smile. “And what does Maya Angelou say? ‘Every storm runs out of rain’? Something like that. I like that quote. Well, have a great rest of your day, and enjoy the cake.” I nodded, turning, and walked through the crowd.
I breathed in, hoping I’d be able to fill my lungs this time. I still couldn’t. I likely wouldn’t be able to take a real deep breath until I saw Rae and made things right. It had been almost two full days since our disagreement, and we hadn’t spoken except through text messages.
Rae hadn’t texted at all on Sunday. I’d sent her a message Sunday night after leaving my parents’ house on foot, my heart heavy with uncertainty.
Jackson: Please give me a call when you have some time. I’d like to talk.
She didn’t message me back until this afternoon.
Rae: Just seeing your message. I had my phone off, I’m sorry. I love you and miss you and agree we need to talk. Sienna is taking me to the Donner Bakery for something called Cake Week. I’ll be there until six, and then I’ll be at the carriage house.
Rae: Also, Dave, Miguel, and Jethro will be with me the whole time. Please don’t worry. I will be safe and careful.
Her second text eased a tension I’d been carrying since Saturday night, giving me hope that maybe she’d be open to discussing her safety. I didn’t want to push her, but I knew, deep down, I wouldn’t be able to help myself. If she wasn’t safe, if someone could just walk in and get to her whenever they pleased, I wouldn’t be able to leave her side. I’d make myself crazy with worry.
I’d texted her a quick note back, letting her know I’d be at the bakery by 4:30 PM, so here I was.
The crowd was thick, but that was no surprise. Cake Week drew a big crowd. The big crowd meant I had to stop every few feet and say hi to someone, chitchat and ask about their son, or daughter, or dog, or houseplants. But then I spotted Dave’s tall head by the entrance to the bakery, and I made a beeline for it, putting off folks who tried to stop me and ask after my family, my boat, and my houseplants.
With each step I took closer to Dave, my heart rose higher and higher in my throat until I almost stood directly in front of him, searching the area for Rae and not finding her.
I forgot my manners, and instead of greeting Dave like I ought, I blurted, “Where is she? I thought you were supposed to be with her?”
He grinned, reaching his hand out for a shake. “Jackson. It’s so good to see you. Rae is in the kitchen with Miguel and Jethro. Sienna and Cletus are there too.” He turned, waving for me to follow while he filled me in. “The crowd became too much, you know? She didn’t want to leave. You said you’d be here at four thirty, and she wanted to wait. But, man, I hope you’re hungry, because Cletus’s wife made this huge chocolate cake, just for Rae. And it is sooo goooood.”
I was only half listening as we walked through the mostly empty bakery to the side door leading to the kitchen. Dave paused and knocked, saying, “Open up. It’s Dave and Jackson.”
Working to ready myself for the sight of her, I ignored my hammering heart as the door opened. I searched the space. And I saw her.
She hovered just behind Miguel—who’d opened the door—and her gaze crashed into mine.
“Hi,” she said, her voice breathless.
“Hi,” I said, struggling to remember what I’d been thinking just seconds ago.
A hopeful-looking smile curved her lips, and she stepped around her guard, hesitating for maybe a second before wrapping her arms around me. “I missed you. I’m so glad to see you.” Her voice caught, snagged on the words, giving me the sense she hadn’t been certain I’d show. The sound cracked my heart wide open.
“I missed you,” I said against her neck, placing a kiss on the soft skin.
We held each other, and someone cleared their throat. We ignored them, clinging to each other. It felt like I had my whole world in my arms right now, and I wasn’t certain I’d ever be able to release her. I wanted to stay just like this, maybe forever, and I accepted the fact that I’d never be able to walk away from Rae. She was it for me.
But then Cletus Winston’s voice cut through my reflections. “You don’t have to let go, but we’re just going to move y’all into the room.” Hands came to my shoulders and guided me into the kitchen.
I lifted my head, speaking to Cletus, “We’re capable of—”
“No, no. Stay just like that,” he said, encouraging us not to release each other by placing a hand on my back and a hand on hers, smooshing us together. “We’re leaving to give y’all some privacy. Hug for hours if you want. There’s cake for sustenance and a couch in the back for . . . other things.”
While he spoke, the people in the kitchen filed out. I caught glimpses of Jethro and Sienna and their kids, Jennifer, Beau and his lady, Shelly. Miguel left wordlessly through the back door, but Dave left through the door leading to the front of the bakery. Presumably, they were each guarding an entrance until we were ready to leave.
And then the doors shut, and we were alone, still hugging each other. Rae had dipped her head back to watch the action, a smile on her face. The sight of it eased another tension, and I tried to take a deep breath again. This time my lungs almost filled, but not quite.
She looked at me and I looked at her, sad to see her smile diminish and be replaced by a line of determination and something else I couldn’t place.
“Jackson,” she started, her hands linking behind my back. “I am sorry.”
I studied her, saying nothing, waiting for her to explain. I didn’t want to make any assumptions.