Prologue
Justice
Gazing out the window next to my bed, I look up from my laptop. I’ve been writing on her for years, and she’s having a hard time keeping charge, but I’ll keep her around for as long as I can.
She’s seen it all.
The aftermath of the kidnapping with Travis, the bond Caelin and I have forged from one of the worst nights of our lives, and the kisses we’ve shared since.
Going to the folder I’ve labeled as my journal, I look for a few particular documents. When I see them, I click on each, taking a moment to read how I felt in those moments.
The Aftermath
Doc Jones said it would be good for me to start writing my feelings out. This is my first attempt.
Here it goes…
I was kidnapped and Caelin Blackfoot saved my life.
Safety
It’s slightly insane. In the five years since the kidnapping, I’ve started to only feel safe with one person. Caelin.
Although I know the people in my life would move heaven and earth to save me, the only person who’s ever gone through with that is him. And because he’s put himself in danger for me…he’s my safe. No matter what situation I’m in. I look for him.
My Birthday
I kissed Caelin. Let me say that again.
I.
Kissed.
Caelin.
He didn’t pull away, either. He leaned into it. Gave me a glimpse of everything I’ve wanted and been missing. I can’t wait to get old enough to make my own decisions and kiss him whenever I want.
Shaking my head, I close the lid on the laptop, then think better of it. I have more to write.
When I open it, it won’t turn on, and my stomach drops. This thing holds every single one of my secrets for the last eight years of my life. And funnily enough the only one who can fix it is the one I’ve been writing about since I got it.
Chapter One
Caelin
“C’mon, I just need you to please fix my laptop.”
Justice Walker can plead like no one else, and she knows I’ll do anything she asks me to.
It started with a kiss.
No, that’s a lie. It started in the middle of a dangerous situation where my family was being threatened.
As a seventeen-year-old kid, I hadn’t known what to do. Instead, I’d acted on instinct and killed a grown man to save the then ten-year-old standing in front of me.
Never will I be able to forget the minutes that lead up to the decision I made. The fear on her face, the smugness on his. If I close my eyes, even now, I’m right back there. Mildew and mold, along with the musk of disuse build in the back of my nose, almost to my throat. A dungeon of equal parts dust and moisture, confusing the senses, not letting one believe where they truly are.
In the distance there’s a drip, drip, drip. A steady cadence of water coming from above our heads. But it’s what’s right in front of me that’s scaring the fucking shit out of me. Justice on Drew’s hip, them hugging one another tightly. Travis, getting up on shaking legs, with equally shaky hands, taking aim at the two of them.
It’s in that moment I see my life without her.
I can’t let that happen - not when I know Justice has so much to offer the world. She always has.
She’s the good so many strive to be like. The type of positive people like Travis, try to snuff out. But she’s not the burning end of a match, and he’s not the sole of a worn-in motorcycle boot, as much as he’d like to be.
My finger pulling the trigger stopped him, and while I’ll always feel guilty, I’ll never apologize.
The clearing of her throat brings me back to the here and now. She’s standing in front of me, her hands on her hips. “Well?”
“What’d you do to it?” My sigh is accompanied by her eye roll.
“If I knew what I’d done to it, would I be here?”
“That fuckin’ mouth.” I point at her.
She purses her lips. “You like it, and you know you do.”
Grunting, I reach for the laptop. When I grab hold of it, our fingers touch, sending my thoughts back to the night off her birthday. The night we locked lips in the kiss I can’t stop thinking about.
Four months.
I’m still trying to figure out how to react to it. What I’m supposed to do with it. If it were anyone other than Justice, I would have already loved ‘em and left ‘em. But she’s different. In all the ways.
Once I have her, I’ll never let her go. Since the moment I took out Travis Steele, I knew she’d be it for me. A protective instinct swooshed into my heart that day, and in the blink of an eye, I could see our lives together. Almost losing her revealed how much she meant to me, and I promised myself when the time was right, she would be mine. That’s what has kept me away from her for so long, but she’s grown now.
A woman.
An adult
Ready to make her own damn decisions.
But there are worries at the back of my mind. Insecurities I’ve never felt with anyone else. What if I’m her knight in shining armor, and that’s why she looks up at me like I hung the moon? Is it hero worship? Stockholm syndrome or whatever the fuck it’s called? Late at night when I think I might give us a shot, all this shit comes up out of nowhere, and I talk myself out of it again.
Which is why I’m sitting here in front of my bank of monitors, holding this laptop with a fucking holographic cover on it, hot as goddamn virgin because my fingers touch hers. “What’s it doing?”
“Umm.” She plops into the seat across from me, her knee touching mine. “It’s what it’s not doing that’s a problem. The damn thing won’t turn on and I have a ton of stuff to do for Mom.”
“You still clerking?”
She tilts her head to the side, disbelief on her face. “Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m doing.” She points to the bank of monitors. “You’re the only person who knows everything going on with anybody in this club. So yes, Caelin, I’m still clerking.”
A smirk works its way across my face. When she’s annoyed, she’s a dynamite. “Did you try charging it.”
She reaches forward to grab it. “If you’re going to act like I’m some dumb airhead, I’m going to take it to Best Buy. I know you’re not used to women who think for themselves, but yes, IT guru, I did try to charge it. It won’t keep charge, which is why it’s dead.”
“So you do know what’s wrong with it.”
“No, I don’t. Not why it won’t keep charge anyway.” She blows out a breath, causing the tendrils of hair on the side of her face to move.
“Everything’s on the cloud, why don’t you go get a new one. This things gotta be eight years old by now. It’s time to upgrade.”
“I don’t want to upgrade, Caelin. I want you to fix this one.”
“And what I’m saying to you,” - I give her a pointed look - “brat, is that I might not be able to fix it. Once they age out, it’s hard to keep them going. The best thing to do is to go get a new one. It’ll save us both a lot of time and heartache.”