“Hi,” he said, tucking a stray curl behind my ear.
“Hi.”
“I love your hair. Your eyes… Your smile.”
I blushed harder at his words. “It took me a long time to accept my wild curls.”
“You know, I’ve heard redheads tend to have a fiery temper.” Matteo’s brow lifted.
“Maybe, a long time ago.” But it had been long beaten out of me.
I hadn’t realized I’d dropped my gaze until Matteo gently gripped my chin and lifted my face back to his. “Right here, right in this moment, the past stays where it belongs. This is about you and me.”
It wasn’t.
It was about so much more than that. But I wanted to pretend. I wanted to join him in the fantasy. Just like I had that night all those months ago.
“Come here.” He buried his hand into my hair and curved it around the nape of my neck, drawing me closer. His lips teased mine, kissing the corner of my mouth, my jaw, pecking the end of my nose.
I began to tremble involuntarily, overwhelmed at his touch, at the emotions coursing through me.
“Caitlin?” Matteo pulled away to look at me. “What’s wrong?”
“I… I don’t deserve this,” I whispered, barely able to look at him.
Anger flashed in his eyes, and I jerked back.
“Shit, Cait, I… I’m not angry at you.” He pulled me into his arms, holding me. I relaxed against his chest, breathing in his delicious male scent. Matteo smelled of pinewood and spice and all those things a guy should smell of.
“I’m sorry,” I murmured.
I’d ruined it—the moment.
But I couldn’t get out of my head. I couldn’t stop thinking about what would happen when he found out the truth.
When Matteo discovered I wasn’t who he thought I was.
Chapter 14
Matteo
Caitlin slept in my arms for hours. I didn’t have the heart to wake her. Besides, laying there with her was everything. Knowing she trusted me enough to be so close to her. It was all I wanted.
When Luis had gotten a call from Arianne to return to the city, I’d wondered if Caitlin would feel comfortable being alone with me. Never in my wildest dreams had I expected this.
But now I had it, I wasn’t sure I could ever let it—let her—go.
“No,” she murmured, twisting in my arms. “No.”
“Shh, Tink, you’re dreaming.” I stroked a hand down her arm.
“No, no. Please… no!” Fear laced her words as she began thrashing, her hands fighting some invisible monster.
“Cait,” I said, shaking her gently. “Wake up. You’re dreaming. It’s just a—”
“No… NO!” She bolted upright and my heart leaped into my throat.
“Cait?” I whispered, reaching for her shoulders. Her body tensed as she let out a pained whimper.
“M-Matteo.” She stared up at me with wild, confused eyes.
“Hey, I’m here.” I sat up, wrapping my arms around her. “I’m right here.”
“I… oh God… I’m sorry. I’m so, so—”
“Hey,” I touched the side of her face, coaxing her to look at me. “You have nothing to be sorry for.”
“I’m a mess. I didn’t…” She sucked in a ragged breath. “I fell asleep?”
I nodded, fighting the urge to ask her what she was dreaming about. Or who.
Red-hot anger zipped through me, but I forced it down. This wasn’t about me—it was about her. About what she needed.
“Do you want me to get you a drink, some water?”
“N-no, I—” Her eyes darted to my mouth, and she wet her lips. “I…”
My anger was tamped down by the shift in the air between us.
Caitlin curled into my side as I held her, her body trembling, fear radiating from every pore.
“Tell me what happened, please.” My voice cracked.
It was driving me out of my mind not knowing the truth. All I wanted to do was help her, to be by her side when things got too tough.
“Tink,” I whispered, hating that she still couldn’t tell me.
Caitlin shifted in my arms to look up at me. She smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes and she laid her hand against my chest. “I…”
Time stopped, my heart beating violently in my chest.
“Please, just talk to me.” I pushed the hair off her face to look at her. To really look at her.
“Matteo, I…” She pressed her lips together, her gaze dropping.
My heart went with it.
She wasn’t going to let me in. Even now, after everything, Caitlin wasn’t going to let me in.
I went to roll away, needing some space. But she grabbed my arm. “No, please… just…”
“Just what, Cait?” Our eyes locked, the air between us charged with anticipation. She could feel it too, I knew that. But she was too damaged, too scared to act on it.
“Maybe I should go,” I sighed with defeat.
“N-no… I don’t want you to leave,” she rushed out, panic lacing her words. “I just…”
“You just what, Cait?” Dipping my head, I met her eye-to-eye. “What do you want?”
Her bottom lip wobbled, but then she inhaled a deep breath and whispered, “Make me forget, Matteo. All I want is to forget.”
She leaned back, until our noses brushed. I inhaled deeply, my heart galloping in my chest. She was offering me everything I wanted, but part of me knew it was a moment of weakness. A moment that, in the harsh light of day, she might regret.
“Please…” She kissed the corner of my mouth, a featherlight touch I felt all the way down to my soul.
“Shit, Tink, you don’t know what you’re asking of me.”
What was I doing? This was what I wanted… all I wanted. And yet, I didn’t want to hurt her.
I didn’t want to be something she might regret.
Fuck.
“I need this, Matteo.” Her eyes shuttered as she drew in a ragged breath. “I need you.”
Those three little words snapped the final shred of my resolve and in one smooth move, I rolled her underneath me.
“Hi,” I whispered, brushing my nose over hers.
“Hi.” She ran her hands up my chest and over my shoulders. Her eyes glittered so much emotion it was like a punch to the chest. “I’m glad you’re here,” she said.
Fuck. Why did that mean so much to me?
“You really want this?” You really want me? I swallowed the words.
Caitlin nodded, showing me with actions, not words that she was all in. Her lips met mine in a teasing kiss, her hand sliding into the hair at the back of my neck. It felt good, too fucking good, and my hips rocked against her. But there were too many layers between us. My jeans. Her leggings.
I climbed off the bed and shuck out of my jeans, feeling like a fucking God as her eyes drank in every inch of my body. Then I moved to the side of the bed, leaning over Caitlin and slowly pulling down her leggings.
“This okay?” I asked. She nodded.
Thank fuck, she nodded. Because now she’d given me the green light, I couldn’t think about anything except feeling her skin pressed up against mine again. Our bodies fused together, moving as one.