I felt the pad of his thumb skimming the side of my neck. My vision filled with nothing but Logan. With my heart fuller than it had ever been, thoughts of the last week invaded—Logan coming home to me, going to sleep beside him, waking up the same. I knew then as it was happening I didn’t want it to end. Now, knowing that he loved me and I was free to love him I never wanted it to end.
Logan was right; we’d lost time and just this morning in the form of bullets I had the reminder that time was precious and more of it wasn’t guaranteed.
“Okay.”
“Okay, you’ll think about it?”
“Okay, I’ll move in.”
And since Logan’s forehead was resting on mine, I got to watch up close as emotion flashed in his eyes right before they slowly drifted close. I got to feel his fingertips press deep and his body relax under mine.
21
I watched Lauren walk back into the house, Shiloh and my sisters coming through the sliding glass door behind her, and I did this coming to terms with how badly I’d fucked up. Self-reflection sucked ass. Having to admit you were wrong your whole life sucked, too. But knowing you hurt the woman you loved was worse. And seeing that woman almost get a bullet through her brain made a man quickly reconsider his stupidity.
Lauren said I had bad timing. She was right but she was also wrong. Right in the sense I should’ve dealt with my shit months ago and told her how I felt. But she was also wrong—there was no time like the present and I wasn’t going to let anything get in the way of getting what I wanted even if that meant telling her I loved her in a room full of people.
There had been a steady stream of friends coming in and out of my house in the hour we’d been there. First, Drake and Matt stopped by on their way back to the office. Both men had barged in and bee-lined to Lauren, wanting to see for themselves she was unharmed. They left with the promise they’d be back. Next was Trey and Luke. Much like Matt and Drake, they were in and out after checking on Lauren.
My sisters had made quick work of getting groceries. By the looks of it they just threw whatever they came across into the cart; never had my kitchen seen so much food.
My mom had called to tell me that she and Quinn would be a while. Emily Walker, Quinn’s mother, had shown up with Lily Lenox and they were going to the home goods store to pick up “odds and ends”. Whatever the hell that meant, I had no clue, but I figured my mom would take care of getting what Lauren would need to be comfortable.
And lastly, Reagan Clark and Blake McCoy had shown with their husbands, Nolan and Levi, with a dining room table. I didn’t ask where it came from. I didn’t question it when Reagan turned to Lauren and asked her if the table was where she wanted. Further, I didn’t bother examining why I liked Reagan asking and Lauren directing the men to move the table a few feet so it was center. I knew why. This was what I’d been waiting for. This was why I bought this house and left it unfurnished.
I’d been waiting for Lauren to make my house into our home.
Jesus, I was a dumbfuck.
Lauren walked past Jasper, Lenox, Nolan, and Levi’s huddle and came straight to me.
“You have a great backyard,” she told me when she stopped next to me.
“We have a great backyard,” I corrected and watched Lauren’s face gentle. “The realtor told me the people who sold me the house had plans to put in a pool and the permits were already approved.”
“A pool?”
“Yeah, Ren, a pool. You want one?”
“Pools are expensive.”
“Didn’t ask you about the cost. Asked if you want one.”
“You have to buy a new car.”
“Insurance will cover the car and if it doesn’t I’ll buy a new one. You haven’t answered, you want a pool?”
“Of course she wants a pool, you dumb lug,” Jill interrupted. “And patio furniture, and maybe a hot tub.”
A hot tub would be first.
Before I could tell my sister to butt out she continued. “Matt will be here any minute to give me a ride to the airport. That way, Ian’s not interrupted. I wish I could stay, too, but with the promotion, I have to get back.”
My mother had declared she was extending her trip, Ian had readily agreed, and Jackie was all for staying. I wasn’t particularly fond of the looks Jackie had been casting Echo Kent’s way and had suggested she go home with Jill but she’d refused.
As if on cue the front door opened and Matt walked in.
“Ready?” he called out. “Traffic’s a bitch this time of day.”
“Yeah, my bags are by the door,” Jill told Matt then turned to me. “Walk me out?”
A sudden wave of remorse hit me. The same guilt that gnawed at the end of each visit. I loved my mom and sisters, I visited them when I could and they did the same, coming to wherever I’d lived, but I would never move back to Bad Axe and for some unknown reason, they still lived there with all the bad memories that came with our childhood. I knew they understood why I couldn’t spend any more time in Michigan than I did but I still felt guilt over not being closer, being more involved in their daily lives, not being there to watch over them.
“Be right back.” I bent to kiss Lauren’s forehead but she tipped her head back and offered me her lips. Christ, that felt good even if it was a soft touch. Hell, it felt good because it was a soft brush.
“I’ll be right out, I want to say goodbye to everyone.”
Jill grabbed Lauren by the hand and pulled her in the direction of the kitchen where, by the looks of it, the women were rearranging cabinets. I followed Matt out the front door and down the drive to the curb.
“How is she?” Matt asked as soon as he stopped by his mammoth jacked-up truck.
He was asking about Lauren.
“Freaked the fuck out.”
“Dylan was still checking local traffic cams and he set Ian on airport footage in Nashville to confirm Guy got on the flight. Something’s not adding up.”
“No shit,” I spat. “What are the chances that today was the day that Guy decided to make his approach, the same day two unidentified shooters decide to take me out? I don’t give a fuck if Guy’s in Nashville; it’s not a coincidence. Whether Guy meant to take me out or grab Lauren or hell, take her out, he’s fucking behind this.”
“I agree. My gut says this is about us getting too close to whatever Guy’s got going on. You taking his girl is a bruise to his ego, sure. But a fuckstick like him doesn’t have it in him to go after you alone. He’d need firepower which makes me wonder where he’d find the connections to get it, and since he did, how he found it so quickly. Not to mention, where he came up with the cake to pay for it. His bank accounts are healthy, he’s certainly not hurting for money, but he’s not loaded and a hit costs a whack, which he does not have.”
“I take it you looked, so were there any withdrawals from any of his accounts?” I asked.
“Nope. Nothing out of the ordinary. Which also raises some red flags—his deposits and withdrawals are clean, too clean. Same amounts every month. Taxes are filed on time and sparkling clean, not a single questionable deduction, all income down to the penny reported. I don’t know a single business owner who doesn’t have ups and downs on their balance sheet.”