I didn’t know what would happen, but this edgy, pissed-off feeling I’d been carrying around with me had to let up. Even if he wasn’t sorry and didn’t apologize, I had to get it all off my chest. After that, the future of our friendship was on him.
“What are you thinking about?” Bri asked me as the plane took off.
“About my meeting with Jayson on Sunday.”
“You think he’ll be mad?”
I shrugged. “I honestly don’t give a shit. I think he knows Tyler and I have something to say, which is why he chose a public place to meet up instead of his and Liz’s suite at the hotel, but that’s okay. I wasn’t planning to deck him.”
“Use your words, honey,” she said, chuckling.
“Yes, dear.”
I’d gotten Bri to change before we left the restaurant and she fidgeted in her seat as we drove through L.A.
“Are you sure jeans and my Luke Bryan T-shirt are okay for whatever we’re doing?” she asked.
“Positive.”
“Are you going to tell me the surprise?”
“You’ll see soon enough.”
I pulled up to the arena and got into the long line of pre-concert traffic. Bri wasn’t stupid, and she twisted around in her seat, trying to figure out where we were.
“The Staples Center.” She squinted. “Wait, are we going to a concert—oh-my-god-it’s-Luke-Bryan-I-think-I’m-hypervetilating-is-it-Luke-Bryan?!”
I burst out laughing.
“It sure is.”
“Oh my god! Declan!” She threw her arms around me since we weren’t really moving anymore anyway. “You are fucking awesome! This is amazing!”
I just smiled, staring straight ahead. This was only half of her surprise but she didn’t know that yet.
“You gonna shake it for me, darlin’?” I asked her, paraphrasing the lyrics to one of his songs that I knew she liked.
“All night long, baby.” She was grinning from ear to ear and it made me happy to see her so excited.
After we parked, I picked up the envelope with our tickets from the will call window and we went to find our seats.
“Front row?” she whispered, gaping at the ticket in her hand. “We’re in the front row?”
“Yep.”
“This is…” Her voice trailed off. “I’m kind of in shock. I’ve never been front row to anything.”
“Well, when you have friends in low places…” My reference to the Garth Brooks song made her roll her eyes but she was practically bouncing in place when we got to our seats. She hadn’t even wanted to stop at the concession stand to get a snack or to buy a T-shirt, but I figured I’d run out and grab some stuff for us during the opening act.
Country wasn’t really my thing, but I was happy to be here with her since Luke was her favorite artist. I’d reached out to his people and they’d been gracious enough to give us seats and backstage passes, but she didn’t know that yet. I’d kept the passes hidden in my pocket, so she thought we were just seeing the show. I hoped I’d be able to catch the look on her face on my camera phone when she figured out she was going backstage.
Meanwhile, she didn’t seem to be thinking about anything but the performer currently onstage. She knew every word to every song, and danced around, singing at the top of her lungs. Watching her joy in the music, the show, the performer, brought a lot of the things going on in my life full circle. Not because I needed her to be my fan professionally, but because of all the people my music had touched in people like her. Me, Declan “Bash” James, had tens of thousands of fans, maybe more, who felt about me like she felt about Luke. Was I ready to walk away from that?
Not the adoration or even the money, but the feelings it evoked. Watching how happy it made Bri to dance around while Luke performed was poignant to me. So many fans reacted that way to my music. Our music. Nobody’s Fool had done a private show at an exclusive sex club in Las Vegas. We’d thought it would be a great way to practice our show and set list in front of a live audience, but had assumed the members would go about their usual business. Instead, there had been very little sex or anything else happening while we played—they’d been all in for the show. Dancing, singing to a handful of songs they knew, and digging the new stuff they didn’t know.
It had been eye-opening and that was when we’d decided to go for it. Because there was some magic in the band. It was just me who was struggling to see it and I still wasn’t completely sure why. Part of it definitely had to do with Jayson and Casey, abandonment issues of a sort. There was a little more to it, and I was so close to figuring it all out, but I hadn’t yet.
I did know that I wasn’t ready to retire, though. Whether it was with Nobody’s Fool or some other project I created, I couldn’t just stay home and do nothing.
But you’d have Bri.
The thought filtered through my subconscious, and I looked down at her, wondering if she’d turn her life upside down to follow me around on the road. How could we be together if I went back on tour and she went to culinary school? It wasn’t impossible, but I had a feeling a sensitive woman like Bri wouldn’t love the idea of me being out on tour with groupies everywhere while she stayed back going to school. And I was already invested in this thing we’d started.
Sometimes it took a while to build something emotionally significant. Other times, you just knew. This time, I just knew. We were good together. We’d be good together going forward. But it would be an uphill battle if we each followed our paths.
Not tonight, I told myself sternly. We’d agreed not to think about any of that for two weeks and they weren’t up yet. They’d be up on Sunday, which was when I was meeting Jayson, so until then, I pushed all that stuff to the back of my mind and laughed as Bri hip-bumped me.
“Having fun?” I yelled in her ear.
“The best time ever!” She yelled back.
* * *
Luke finished the show and Bri leaned against me as the lights came back up.
“Best concert of my whole life,” she told me. “I will never have another night like tonight.”
“You might,” I teased. “But it’s not over yet, you know.”
“Ooooh, are we doing butt stuff tonight?” Her eyes glinted with a combination of humor that held a touch of curiosity.
“Maybe,” I slid my arm around her neck. “But first, I have one more non-sexual surprise.”
“Like what?”
I pulled the backstage passes out of my pocket and slid one around my neck as I handed her the other.
She held it in her hand, frowning slightly, and then looked up at me. “What is this?”
“Backstage pass.”
There was complete silence as she stared at it.
“You should put it around your neck so security can easily see it and no one snatches it out of your hand. It happens more often than you think.”
“Put it around my…” Her voice trailed off and there were tears in her eyes again. “Declan!” She burst into tears and threw herself against my chest.
“Aw, don’t cry, venti macchiato.” I stroked her back. “Come on, you’re going to smudge your makeup and you’re going to be really pissed when it looks that way in the pictures you take with Luke.”