But then a knock sounded on my office door.
Damn it. My hand instantly fell from Penny’s, and I took a step back. I stared at the ground for a moment, trying to clear my head. All I could think about was the fact that I wish I had locked the door. When I looked back up at her, I still felt that same heat. That hunger. I needed her. I needed her like I’d never needed anything before. My eyes drifted to the sweater. Take it back. I needed her to keep it. For some reason, if she did, it meant that this wasn’t over.
It was like she could read my mind. She picked up her backpack and shoved the sweater back inside.
I smiled to myself. I had Penny just where I wanted her. I walked over to the door like I hadn’t been about to tear off a student’s clothes and opened it just as Penny pulled her backpack over her shoulder.
Professor Kean walked in. I had completely forgotten about the faculty meeting. And I’d definitely forgotten about walking over with her. She was wearing a charcoal pencil skirt and matching blazer. Her high heeled shoes made her almost as tall as me. And her bright red lipstick just made her look…unnatural. Her sophisticated ensemble did nothing for me. All I wanted was to see Penny in my sweater again, staring up at me sweetly, if not a little apprehensively.
"Ready to go, James?" Professor Kean asked, and then she spotted Penny. She glanced down at her watch. "Sorry, I thought office hours were over. I can wait outside." She smiled at me.
"We just finished up," I said. "I'm ready to go." I tightened my tie as I turned back to Penny. "See you tomorrow, Miss Taylor." I said the words without really looking at her, because if we had made eye contact, I was worried I wouldn’t be able to control myself. No, I knew I wouldn’t be able to control myself.
Penny walked over to us. "Thanks for your help, Professor Hunter.”
God, I love when she says my name like that. I tried not to stare at her ass as she walked out of my office.
“So sorry about interrupting,” Professor Kean said with a laugh. Which made no sense, because what she said wasn’t even funny. She proceeded to touch my arm.
I pulled my arm away and watched as Penny disappeared from view. Professor Kean was saying something else to me, but all I could think about was that I had been so close. So freaking close. And I wasn’t sure if it was a good or bad thing that we’d gotten interrupted.
The professional part of me was thankful that Professor Kean had walked in. But the rest of me? I was still a man. And the part of me that wasn’t worried about my job was really pissed. I’d almost had Penny. Right here. I’d been seconds away from kissing her. Touching her. Damn it.
“Are you okay?” Professor Kean asked as she touched my arm again.
“Fine.” I grabbed my satchel, again making her hand fall from my arm. I didn’t want her to touch me.
“Rough office hours? I’m always telling Vespelli that we don’t need to sit here for hours. I barely ever get any students stopping by. And when I do, it’s always just a simple question. Email would suffice, don’t you think?”
Now this was something I could actually talk to her about. “I was just thinking that myself.”
“Really? We should bring it up at the meeting today.”
“Yeah…maybe.” Did I really want office hours to be cancelled? Office hours could mean more one-on-one time with Penny. Time I was aching for.
“What, don’t tell me you’re scared of the dean? He’s a big softie.”
I wasn’t scared of Vespelli. But I did want to remain on his good side. Because I was going to sleep with a student. It wasn’t even a question anymore. It was just a matter of when it was going to happen. And if Vespelli ever found out…I wanted him to like me. As a backup plan so that he wouldn’t unleash hell on me. I didn’t expect anyone to ever find out though.
“I know he’s a big softie,” I said. “I just don’t want to step on his toes.”
After all, Vespelli had done me a favor by giving me this job. I wasn’t qualified. And I certainly didn’t deserve a second chance after what happened in New York. He’d taken a leap of faith on me.
“But who ever got anywhere without stepping on a few toes?” she asked as we made our way downstairs.
I shrugged. Not me. I’d created a handful of enemies in my early twenties and I hadn’t cared at the time. But my life wasn’t as black and white as it used to be. “Keep your friends close and your enemies closer. It’s a saying for a reason.”
“And what am I? A friend or an enemy?” She smiled up at me.
An enemy. Everyone at this school was an enemy. Because any one of them could potentially betray me once I finally got Penny where I wanted her. Even Penny herself. But this was the perfect opportunity to make my intentions clear as far as Professor Kean was concerned. “Friends,” I said. “That’s all I need right now.”
“Well, at least I’m not an enemy,” she said with a laugh. But this time she didn’t touch my arm. Hopefully that meant she got the hint. “Any chance you want to go out for drinks after this, buddy?”
Or maybe she hadn’t gotten the hint. The addition of the word “buddy” didn’t convince me. “I can’t, I have plans.” It was a lie. I never had any plans. Just a routine, and it was better if I didn’t break it.
“Maybe some other time, then.”
I walked into the room where the meeting was occurring instead of answering her. We sat down in the back because it had already started. I looked around at all the other professors. All the ones that knew how to keep it in their pants.
Anyone else in my position would follow the rules. But I wasn’t like everyone else. There was a reason I was going to therapy. There was a reason why I’d stopped talking to everyone from my past. There was a reason I was alone. And it all went back to the issue of self-control.
As Vespelli droned on, I pretended to snap my wrist with an imaginary rubber band.
A few professors laughed about something Vespelli said. I could feel Professor Kean’s eyes on me. She probably thought it was odd that I hadn’t laughed. But I wasn’t paying attention. And nothing about the situation I was in was humorous.
I was spiraling. I thought I was getting better. But with Penny? Whenever I saw her, all my self-control went out the window.
Chapter 11
Friday
It felt like I was hungover even though I didn’t drink a drop of the scotch I’d poured myself last night. And the last thing I wanted to do was step into my classroom right now. I needed to go for a run and let off some steam. Or take a nap instead of staring at my bedroom ceiling for five hours.
But the real reason I was standing outside my classroom door was because there wasn’t any part of me that was being reasonable anymore. My head, my heart, my cock…they were all pointing in one direction. One of those things quite literally.
Penny was like a drug in my veins. And I knew I needed to get her out of my system. Maybe this weekend. My dick stirred at the thought. I had her number now. Surely one night with me would be more alluring to her than a night with the boy she liked to sit in the back row with. One night and we could both move on. That’s what we needed.