Before she left, she turned her head and said, "Have a good weekend, Professor Hunter."
It was like she knew my weekend was going to be hell. Because she wasn’t going to be a part of it.
Chapter 12
Saturday
I looked down at my phone one more time. For some reason, I had this hope that Penny would text me. She’d say she cancelled her date and show up outside my apartment in nothing but lacy black lingerie, holding a bottle of whipped cream.
There was a lot wrong with that scenario. Everything down to the fact that she had no idea where I lived. And the fact that the autumn air was too cold to prance around in just lingerie. Oh, and the fact that I’m her professor.
Breathe. This week had been slow torture. Penny had invaded all my senses. My appointment with Dr. Clark tomorrow couldn’t come soon enough. I needed to actually tell him about Penny. The secret was driving me insane. Or maybe it was just the temptation that was killing me. Either way, he’d know what to do.
He’ll tell you to stop.
But I ignored a lot of Dr. Clark’s advice. If I did everything he said, I’d probably be going to a family dinner at my parents’ on Sundays instead of seeing him. Which would be unbearable. I doubted they’d even let me join them for a meal. Not that I wanted to. Fuck them. Fuck everyone in New York. That city nearly killed me. I couldn’t go back to a city that felt like it suffocated me.
Dr. Clark didn’t really understand. And just because he told me to do something didn’t mean I had to. I eyed the yoga mat collecting dust in the corner of my closet. Proof that I wasn’t taking my therapy sessions seriously enough.
I glanced at my phone one more time and then pulled on my running shoes. I needed to get some fresh air. Maybe then I’d come back and lie in corpse pose until I died of sex deprivation.
***
I wasn’t sure why I even tried to sleep anymore. Tonight was especially impossible. I couldn’t stop thinking about Penny with someone else. That perfect smile. Her laugh. The blush that crept across her cheeks when she was embarrassed. All for someone else.
I opened my eyes and stared at the ceiling again. Maybe I needed to put a poster up there. Something motivational for slumber like, “Shut your damn eyes and go to sleep you idiot.” Anything along those lines would do.
But the poster wasn’t there, so my mind stayed focused on Penny. Was she inviting her date back to her place? Was he kissing her goodnight? Or was she inviting him in for more? The thought of her wanting anyone else was the hardest pill to swallow. Because I certainly didn’t. She was all I could think about.
I couldn’t just lie here all night thinking about the what-ifs. I needed to get some fresh air. Another run would be good. But my body didn’t move. I was exhausted, mentally and physically. So why the hell wouldn’t my brain turn off?
Breathe.
I could hear Dr. Clark’s voice in the back of my head. He’d say that yoga would help me sleep. I was pretty sure fucking Penny was the only way I’d ever sleep again. As soon as I thought it, my phone buzzed.
The list of people who would be texting me at midnight was pretty slim. My brother being one option. And the other…
I lifted up my phone and stared at the text. The perfect, beautiful, text I’d been waiting for from Penny.
"Any chance I can get a lift?"
I smiled. But then I immediately frowned. If she needed a lift, that meant she was drunk. The thought of her being too wasted to walk herself home was one thing. But the thought of her being drunk and the guy she was out with not walking her home? Not okay. Who the hell was this asshole? I was furious. But also grateful. Because maybe if he’d been a good guy, they’d still be together right now. And I couldn’t stand the thought of someone else touching her. Even if it was as innocent as holding hands. Her hands were only mine to hold. The thought made me pause. I shook my head. I was sleep-deprived. I didn’t know what I was thinking.
"Where are you?" I texted back.
My phone bleeped immediately. "Outside of Kildare's."
"I'll be right there." I was already climbing out of bed, pulling on the nearest clothes: a pair of dark jeans and…I looked around for my shirt from earlier. But all I could find was a zip-up gray hoodie. Screw a shirt. There wasn’t time.
I went to the bathroom and splashed water on my face. Even though I couldn’t fall asleep, I was exhausted. The last thing I wanted was to endanger Penny even more. I brushed my teeth, hoping that the mint flavor would help zap my brain awake. Or maybe I did it because I wanted to kiss her.
Breathe. She was drunk. She was calling me for help. The last thing I was going to do was kiss her. I’d save that for a night that she’d remember. Because I wanted that memory to be seared into her brain forever.
I made my way down to my car as fast as I could. Main Street was pretty empty as I pulled out of the parking garage. Most students were probably still out at parties. If she had called me at one o’clock it would have been a different story. I would have had to drive 10 miles per hour to dodge drunk students. But since it was empty, I sped down the road fast enough for a cop to cite me for reckless driving.
Kildare's was close enough to my apartment that I could have walked. But she’d asked for a lift. And I didn’t mind the idea of her being so close to me. Or the fact that no one would even see us together. Stop. She’s drunk for God’s sake.
It started to drizzle, the rain hitting my windshield like it was pouring because of how fast I was going. I saw her in the distance, sitting on the curb without an umbrella, seemingly not caring an ounce that she was getting wet. She was even smiling. Definitely drunk.
I pulled the car to a stop right in front of her. She stood up and all I could do was stare at the way her black dress clung to her. It was probably that tight before it was wet, but somehow knowing that she was soaked made it that much more seductive. The hemline barely covered her ass and the neckline plunged to her belly button. There was black mesh material over her cleavage so that she wasn't completely exposed. And a slit up the side that would have been sinful if it were any higher.
But then I saw the broken stiletto in her hand. My eyes wandered down her legs. There was blood dripping down her knees. What the hell happened? I leaned over and opened the car door from the inside. She climbed inside and shut the door.
I wanted to ask her who the fuck left her on the curb like this. I wanted to ask her a million questions really. But I was distracted by the fact that she didn’t smell like a brewery. The sweet smell of cherry blossoms invaded the car. Had she even been drinking?
"Did I wake you?" she asked sweetly.
That was how she was going to start this conversation? She was fucking bleeding. I needed a second to calm down, or else I’d snap at her when what I really wanted to do was kill whoever had been with her. I put the car in drive and focused on the road for a minute. She’d asked me a question. But I didn’t have an appropriate answer. No, I hadn’t been sleeping. I’d been lying in bed wishing I was fucking her instead. But I couldn’t exactly tell her that. "Yes," I finally said.
The rain was picking up. In the silence, the drops began to splash loudly on the windshield. I gripped the wheel tighter.