I felt like I was in stasis yet freefalling all at the same time. To say it was an uncomfortable feeling would be an understatement.
I pulled into the driveway, grateful to see the front light on, and everyone’s car in place. I turned off the engine, reached over and grabbed my bag, and sighed. I might as well tell them what I used to do for a living. That would take one of JC’s to-do list items off the schedule.
I made my way inside.
“The prodigal son returns,” Pacey drawled with a laugh as he smacked a kiss on my cheek as soon as I walked in the door.
I raised a brow. “How much have you been drinking already?”
“Not enough.”
“Something wrong?” I asked, instantly on alert.
“No, just good news on the grad-school front. Full rides for Mackenzie and me.”
“Fuck, yeah,” I said with a grin.
“Look at us, growing and making decisions. Being adults.”
I looked at my roommates and shook my head. “We’ve been adults for a long fucking time.”
“That is true,” Dillon said with a grin. “Yet, sometimes, most of our family members treat us like we’re still sixteen.”
“Not me,” I grumbled and waved them off as they gave me a look.
“So, you’re done with work, then?” Miles asked.
I nodded and set my bag next to the couch as he handed me a beer.
“You ever going to tell us what you did?” Dillon asked.
“I assumed he was just a bouncer. Was I right?” Pacey asked and then laughed. I took a swig of my beer and stared at them as they started to rattle off random occupation guesses.
“Firefighter.”
“Male escort.”
“Underground fighter. Though if you were, you can’t talk about fight club.”
“Porn star.”
“Acrobat.”
“Oh, you joined the circus.”
I threw my head back and laughed at that one and gave them all a look.
“If anyone’s going to join the circus, it’s you,” I told Dillon.
“Ah, fuck you. But really, this house is enough of a circus.”
“Amen,” Pacey cheered as he pointed his beer at me.
“Tell us.”
“I was going to tell you anyway, but if you’re going to get all grumpy about it, maybe I won’t.”
“We can just look in your bag,” Miles said. “You don’t usually bring that around us. Afraid we’re going to see?”
“Handcuffs and dildos?” Dillon said.
“And if it was?” I asked, and he just shrugged.
“And you paid for school. You’re not going to be in tremendous debt. Good for you.”
I looked at all of them and shook my head.
“I worked at a club. As a stripper—a damn good one. It paid the bills.”
Everyone just looked at me before Pacey grinned.
“I was close, and I’m kind of sad that you never danced for me.”
“I mean, where were our lap dances?” Dillon asked.
“We would have paid well,” Miles added, and I flipped them off.
“Thanks, guys, I was worried about what you’d think, and now you’re just being assholes about it?”
“So what? You’re a stripper. Good for you,” Pacey added. “I couldn’t do it, mainly because Mackenzie would skin me alive.
“Same with Elise.”
“And Nessa.”
Pacey narrowed his eyes. “What does Natalie think about this?”
“You think Natalie knows?” Dillon asked.
“Of course, she knows.” Miles shrugged. “Right?”
“She saw me at that bachelorette party she went to.”
“Well, then,” Pacey said.
Dillon grinned. “No wonder the two of you can’t keep your hands off each other. You have the right moves.”
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” I added, and they all laughed.
“Well, we know what the entertainment will be for our final party in the house.”
I snorted. “Y’all can’t afford me.” I looked down at my friends and just smiled, knowing that this had gone far better than expected. But I shouldn’t have expected anything less. My friends were good people, and they supported me no matter what. They understood.
Maybe I wasn’t the asshole roommate. No, that title belonged to Sanders, and he no longer lived at the house.
When we finished dinner, I was a little drunk but not too much—more like a happy buzz—and full. Dillon knew how to cook, and since I hadn’t had to help, I did the dishes.
The doorbell rang, and I grinned, knowing who it likely was.
“Look at that lovesick fool,” Pacey said, shaking his head with a grin on his face. “The doorbell rings, and he’s like Pavlov’s dog, smiling wide just thinking about her.”
I scowled. “It’s just Natalie.”
“There’s nothing just about that smile.”
And then the three of them left me alone, each going off to do their respective things while I went to let Natalie in.
She stood in the doorway, a small bag on her shoulder, and her hand over her belly.
“Hi.”
“Hey.” I let her inside, closed and locked the door behind her, and then I kissed her. I couldn’t help it. It was tough to be around her and not kiss her.
That would be a problem if things changed.
We made our way upstairs, the house blessedly quiet so it felt like just the two of us.
“How did your last shift go?” she asked as she set her small bag down on the little couch in my room. She had left a few things over here since we were together more often than not, and I even had a toothbrush at her house. It still felt weird that we were suddenly in this relationship without actually talking about it, but I ignored that. This was easier. Just go with the flow. And pretend that I wasn’t hyperventilating while thinking about what would happen when she left.
“It was good. I told the guys.”
“You did?” she asked. “What’d they say?”
“You were right. They asked why I didn’t dance for them, and that was about it.”
“I guess you owe me a kiss.”
I grinned, leaned forward, and brushed my lips across hers. “Good?”
“The best. I’m glad it went well with them.”
“Me, too. I don’t know what I would have done if I had to kick their asses.”
“Like you would hurt your friends.”
“I could.”
“You’re a much better guy than that, Tanner. And we both know it.”
I shook my head. “Anyway, I didn’t have to kick their asses, so all is well.”
“That’s always good. Considering that my best friends are your best friends’ girlfriends. Things could get sticky.”
“That’s what happens when one house begins dating those in another.”
“Speaking of houses, can we talk about something?”
I sat next to her on the couch, nodding. “Sure. Why do you sound nervous?”
“Not nervous per se, but this is something we need to talk about. Something we’ve been putting off.”
Dread filled me, and I swallowed hard. “Okay.”