“I’m sorry,” I whispered.
“Don’t be. That wasn’t on you.”
“It’s where I came from, though.”
“Didn’t you just say yesterday that I’m not who my family is?”
“I can’t believe this.”
“Honestly, it went better than I expected,” he said as we pulled out of the neighborhood.
I looked at him then and blinked. “That was better than you expected?”
“I wasn’t arrested. I mean, it could still happen once I get to the house, but they didn’t murder me. I’m going to count that as a win.”
I took in the tight line of his jaw, and I knew he was angry.
This was all my fault. I shouldn’t have brought him. I should’ve dealt with it alone.
When the tears fell, he pulled over to the side of the road and tugged me onto his lap. He held me as I sobbed and mourned the family I thought I’d had. One that wasn’t mine—at least, not anymore. And I held onto Tanner.
I would figure out things for my future. I had a job, I would have a degree, and I would be a mom.
And, somehow, I would do it all with Tanner.
I just had to hope that he didn’t leave before everything changed.
Fifteen
Tanner
My hips moved to the beat, and I winked at the person in front of me before I strolled down the stage, finishing up my routine.
I enjoyed dancing, but this wasn’t my favorite thing to do in the world. However, it made me enough money to pay for school, to give back a bit to my mother, and to save for the future.
The fact that this final dance would go to my child’s college fund made me feel a little weird, but I didn’t care. I was making money, and I was using my body to do it. Screw what anybody thought.
The pace picked up, and I went down, focusing on my floor work before I stood and did the final reveal. People screamed and giggled, and I just winked, giving them my patented grin. It wasn’t the one I gave Natalie or anyone outside of this place. No, any wink or dance I gave Natalie was only for her.
I licked my lips, winked, and bowed while gathering my clothes that I could reach before heading off stage. People whistled and hollered, and I knew I’d made decent money tonight. I was still making tips, but I was also on salary because the place wasn’t some run-down hole in the wall. I even got benefits, which I couldn’t say about any other job I might have gotten outside of a certain coffee shop.
And they hadn’t been hiring when I went to apply.
I shook my head and went back to the locker room to wash off and get ready to head home. I had a late dinner with the guys tonight. Natalie had said that she would come over later just because she wanted to.
I didn’t mind in the least.
I wasn’t the closing act tonight like usual, so it wasn’t too late. I just wanted to get home and start the next phase of my life.
When I walked in, JC was at his locker, finishing getting ready. He opened his arms. I rolled my eyes, feeling a bit odd that I was still in my booty shorts, and he only wore a G-string, but I gave him a big hug and slapped him on the back anyway.
“Nothing homoerotic about this.” He winked, and I snorted, shaking my head as the rest of the guys came in to smack me on the back, as well.
“Looking hot out there, Hagen,” one of the guys called out.
“I always knew you could shake what your mama gave you. The girls are going to miss you.”
“And the guys. And everybody else. You were our headliner. They’re going to wonder where the hell you went.”
Everyone kept talking, and I grinned, quickly getting ready to head home. “You guys have been great, but I’m out for now. My internship’s starting before the semester is over, and I have to be done.”
“This just means I can take your spot,” one of the other guys said, pulling back his blond hair. He looked as if he could bench press me with one pinky, and he made good money for the club.
“I’ll always think of you guys,” I said dryly, and someone threw a clean pair of shorts at me.
“Just come back and visit. But this time, you’ll have to pay to play.”
“That’s an image I’ll never get out of my head,” I added dryly.
They all started laughing and then went back to whatever they had been doing because it was a workday, and there was no rest for the wicked—even those who shook their hips for rounds of tips.
“I’m proud of you,” JC said after a moment, zipping his leather pants.
“For dancing?” I asked as I pulled on my regular jeans.
“That, too. You’re damn good at it, and you learned a few new moves.”
“I’d say you taught me everything I know, but then we’d be creeping into weird territory.”
“Truth. You did good. And you never treated yourself like shit for this job. You’re a good guy. I can’t wait to see where you go from here.”
“That means you’re not just going to bounce on me now that I’m no longer employed here?”
“Never, kid. You’re stuck with me.”
“I like the sound of that,” I said after a moment, grinning.
“Good. ‘Cause you’re not getting another choice. Go make bank at your new job, raise that baby, tell your friends what the fuck you did here so it’s not a secret, and marry that girl.”
I blinked at him, pulling my shirt over my head. “That was a lot in one sentence.”
“Don’t have enough time to say it all if I take my time.”
I shook my head as I grabbed my bag. “You’re my friend. We’ll still go out for a drink or dinner whenever you want.”
“Good, ‘cause I want to see that little baby of yours growing up. And I want to meet their mom. You tell that girl you love her yet?”
“It’s a little more complicated than that,” I whispered.
“Love is always complicated. That’s the whole point. You should tell her. Keeping it in your head will only hurt you both.”
“She doesn’t feel that way about me.”
He guffawed. Literally let out a snort. “See, that’s what’s wrong with you kids today. You’re so far in your head, you’re afraid of what could happen.”
“You’re going to pull that old-man crap with me when you’re about to get on the stage and strip? No. You’re not such an old man.”
“I feel like it some days. I’m almost done, too. And then I can enjoy retirement with my husband.”
“Good, you two deserve it. And remember, I’m not in the same place with Natalie as you are with your guy.”
“You’re not, but you could be. All you have to do is talk to her.”
I shook my head, and he gave me a slightly disappointed look before sighing and gripping my shoulder. “Talk to me soon. Enjoy your night. Your freedom. And your new life.”
“Thanks,” I whispered and then headed out.
The ride home was quiet, and I was glad for the moment to think. The end of the season was coming up, and we were headed full swing into Natalie’s second trimester. We were graduating soon, and everything would change even more.