“What?” asks Grim, leaning forward. It’s the first sign of life he’s shown in hours. “Why?”
“Because she needs our help. I spoke to Mama B, and she made the decision. She’s gonna help her to recover with Doc’s help.”
“She’s a fucking addict, Mav. You can’t undo years of damage. This isn’t a film where we lock her in a room for a day and she comes out cured!”
“You think I don’t know that?” asks Mav, stopping outside the hospital, and we all get out of the car.
Grim grips his head and growls to no one in particular. “It’s like living with the Brady Bunch,” he complains. “This never-ending need to help the world become a better place is bullshit!” Mav smirks, and it only annoys Grim more. “You remember who we are, right?”
“Remind me,” says Mav, leaning against the car, folding his arms over his chest.
“You’re the kid who killed his mother’s one true love. I’m the kid who stuck a knife in his mother’s lover without flinching. I watched him gargle on his own blood and didn’t bat an eyelid. We take life, we don’t save it. I get a kick from watching it drain from a man’s eyes. It gets me fucking hard knowing I can do that without feeling a thing!”
“We save lives too. We saved Rylee, Faith, Maddi, and Gracie, and we can save your mum. If we don’t try, we’ll regret it.”
“I won’t,” says Grim coldly. “Yesterday, when the doc told me she was gonna be okay, I was upset. Upset it wasn’t finally over. Because I need it to be over now, I can’t look out for her anymore.”
Mav slaps him on the shoulder. “I hear you, Grim, I do. You’re struggling right now, so I’ll deal with Carol. I’m not asking you to sit with her or even check in with her. But I can’t walk away and pretend she was never part of this club. Your dad wouldn’t want me to.”
Grim sighs before getting back in the car, and Mav turns to me. “Stay with him. He needs us.”
I climb in the back beside him. Carol can sit up front, away from Grim. “I’m always here,” I begin, watching out the window. “If you need to talk.”
“Nothing can ever happen between us,” he says firmly. “Ever. We’re not the same. You’re a good girl, and I’m fucked up. You’re too young for me and you’re Mav’s little sister. I don’t look at you in that way and I never will. I just want to be perfectly clear, we’re never gonna happen.”
I continue to stare out the window, scared to look in his direction in case my expression gives my pain away. “Totally, we’re not like that at all, and I’m definitely not into you.”
“Good. Let’s just avoid each other from now on and make it easier.”
“You called me,” I mutter.
“I know. I needed your help, and you were great in there, really professional. Thanks.”
“But now you don’t need my help, you want me to stay the hell away from you?”
“It’s for the best,” he mumbles.
I scoff. Best for who? The ache in my chest is too much and I rub the spot. “I need some air.” I get out the car and lean against the door. The urge to get away from Grim is overwhelming, and I find myself walking away from the car and out of the parking lot. Needing to clear my head, I head for the river just over the road.
CHAPTER EIGHT
GRIM
“You just let her go?” snaps Mav, looking around frantically.
“She said she felt ill and needed air. I didn’t notice until she’d already gone.” Mum sits quietly in the front seat, her head bowed. “Yah know what, I’ll go and find her. You take your latest rescue mission home.” I get out the car and head in the same direction as Hadley.
I don’t have to walk far before I spot her sitting on the steps leading down to the river. “You shouldn’t just leave like that,” I say, joining her. “We spoke about this before.”
“I’m fine. I’ll meet you back at the clubhouse.”
“Not gonna happen.”
“You should be with your mum.”
“I think Mav has it covered,” I mutter bitterly.
“He’s right, your dad would have made the club help her.”
“Bullshit,” I snap. “He never helped her when he was around. He told me she didn’t want help, and you can’t help an addict until they admit they need it. Well, she never has and she never will.”
“If you’re so against us helping, why were you visiting her?”
I stare out over the river. “Guilt.”
“For?”
“Killing her boyfriend when I was thirteen.”
“Someone told me about that,” she says thoughtfully. “Why did you kill him?”
“He was a dick. That particular day, I was visiting for the weekend, he was laying into her and I’d had it. I wanted to make sure he didn’t do that when I wasn’t around to protect her. Not that she was happy about it. In fact, she was really mad. I think that’s where we started to drift apart.”
Hadley takes a deep breath and releases it slowly. “Look, I know sometimes Mav can be annoying, but most of the time, his decisions make sense. He’s doing this because it’s the right thing to do.”
“I was thinking of hitting the road again,” I announce. “But after today, there’s no chance of that happening, is there?”
She shakes her head. “No. You’ll lose your licence for a while.”
I stand and hold my hand out to her. She takes it, and I pull her up too. “Then I guess I’d better go and listen to Mav’s crazy plan to save my mum and work out how I can help.”
We take a slow walk in the direction of the clubhouse. “I’m sorry for being so harsh back there, Hadley, but you know I’m talking sense.”
“Forget about it.”
“I just want you to know I—”
“Grim, please, just forget it.”
I nod. Whatever it is I’m feeling, it’s not real. I don’t see Hadley in that way and the only explanation I have right now is that my head is a mess. I need to put distance between us to get everything straight. She’ll understand that in the end, it’s for the best.
The first night having Mum back isn’t so bad. She’s still very tired from her hospital stay, and Doc managed to sort her a programme for the controlled drug, methadone. It should ease her from the heroin gradually, and over time, he plans to reduce the methadone until she’s clean. He made it sound so easy, even I felt hopeful, but as I watch her tossing and turning in her sleep, something tells me I’m kidding myself.
Mav sticks his head in. “How’s she doing?”
I nod. “Seems okay. She’s sleeping a lot.”
“I just went to see Harriett. She’s looking much better too. I think she’ll be up and about soon.”
“Good news. Heard anything about her husband?”
He shakes his head. “Arthur’s keeping him sweet right now, but it won’t last. He’ll want revenge.”