“I… I…I need…” I can’t form words as my body shudders from euphoria. It’s like being high, or drunk. You have no control over your actions. How you feel is nothing you can hold onto. It’s as if a tornado is ripping through every inch of you and all you can do is lie back and let it destroy you.
“We know what you need, Rosebud,” Jarred murmurs behind me as his hands grip my ass, spreading me open to his gaze. His fingers delve into my wetness, coating his finger before he teases the tight entrance that causes me to whimper. He’s right, I want them now, claiming me as theirs.
And I know that once they do, I’ll never be able to leave them.
Ever.
28
ZARIA
The white dress doesn’t feel real. Even as I stare at myself in the mirror, I can’t believe I’m looking at my reflection. After spending my life knowing that my future would be planned out for me, I never allowed myself to think of a dream wedding. I was shocked when dad said he wanted me to marry Finn.
“You look beautiful,” Nesrin says as she enters the room. I’ve asked her to stand by my side as my matron of honor. “The dress is perfect.” She takes me in for a moment, from head to toe. My shoes have offered me some height, which puts us face to face. I still can’t believe this girl is my sister. Well, half-sister, but that still counts. I thought I had lost all my family: first, my father, then my mother, but now, I’ve gained so much more.
“Thank you,” I whisper, emotions holding me hostage. I opted to not wear a veil, so my hair has been styled in loose waves down my back. My makeup is a mix of natural with a smoky eye and a soft pink lip shade. “I wasn’t sure if the shoes would go with the gown, but besides the nerves, I’m happy with how it looks.”
“Nerves are normal,” Nesrin assures me. “I remember when I got married. I was a mess.” The way she holds my arm and offers it a squeeze calms me down somewhat. But there’s still a twist in my stomach along with the flurry of butterflies that can’t seem to leave me alone.
“I can only imagine,” I tell her. “I mean, our guest list is far smaller than you had.”
“It is. I think we had about four hundred people, and most of them I didn’t know,” she tells me. “They were colleagues and staff from Thorne Industries. To be honest, it would have been nicer if we had a more intimate setting. This is perfect.” She gestures around the room, and I know that outside, we have about fifty guests waiting.
I let out a long breath as I glance at myself in the mirror. It’s now or never. But I know that there is no way I can walk away from this. I’m in it. There are two men outside that I love more than I wanted to admit. At first, I found it difficult to even consider having both men in my life. But now, after the handful of months, I can’t think of not having them right next to me.
“Are you ready?” Nesrin asks, her smile is infectious, and I can’t help but return it.
Nodding slowly as I run my hands down my dress, I turn to my sister and smile. “I think so. There isn’t anything that can keep me from getting married. I just need to calm the butterflies in my stomach.”
She smiles. I know she knows how it feels. Then, she tells me, “Finn and Jarred are going to lose their minds when they see you walk down that aisle. A princess befitting of a royal ceremony.”
I turn to her. She’s married to Damien, Finn’s eldest brother, and she’s known Finn far longer than I have. “Do you think Finn is happy?” I don’t know why I need to know this now, or why I’m asking her, but I trust her. She is my sister after all.
“He is,” she tells me confidently. “If he wasn’t, he would never have gone through with this. One thing I’ve learned about Finn Thorne is that he never does something for the sake of it. Even if Bradford wants it. Mind you, all the brothers do what they want, following their own passions. They may love their father, but they’re also very stubborn.”
Interestingly enough, I believe her. I’ve seen that side of Finn, so I don’t know why I’m nervous about walking out there and confessing my love in front of our family. I nod and take another deep breath.
“The only difference between your relationship and mine with Damien is that you have Jarred. But that just means you have extra love to account for.” Her words are a salve to my worried soul.
Nodding, I say, “Thank you. I needed that.”
“That’s what family is for,” Nesrin informs me before she takes my hand. “Now let’s go and show those Thornes exactly what we’re made of before Finn has a panic attack and thinks you’re not coming.” A shiver of nervous excitement causes me to tremble before I grab my bouquet and make my way out of the room.
We decided on having the wedding at the manor. It’s been decorated in golden fairy lights that lead down the stairs, all the way to the garden. With every step along the white carpet that guides me to my future, there are large vases filled with white roses. Everything feels as if it’ been set out in a castle rather than a home. But this place is like a gothic palace, because no home I’ve ever seen looks like Thorne Manor does.
With every step, I pray silently that I don’t fall flat on my face. I’m used to wearing heels, but not when I’m shaking like a leaf in the breeze. The moment I reach the patio doors, my heart stutters in my chest. My ribs ache from the attack, and my lungs struggle to pull in air. When I glance up, I find Finn’s gaze on me. There’s a small, mischievous smile on his face as he stands alongside Jarred, Damien, and Cassian.
The four men are dressed in black tuxedos and crisp white shirts. Their bowties are black, matching their shoes. The guests rise as a song fills the space. It’s not the typical wedding march, and I smile when I realize what Finn chose for me to walk down the aisle to.
“Eyes on Fire” by Blue Foundation haunts my ears as I move toward the makeshift altar that’s been set up for the wedding. The moment I reach my two men, the tears I’ve been holding trickle down my cheek. I may only be marrying one of them, but they’re both mine. As I am theirs.
“You’re perfect,” Finn whispers in my ear when he leans in to press his lips to my cheek. The wetness of my emotions comes away on his mouth, and I’m tempted to kiss him, just to taste it. But he turns toward the minister who also married Damien and Nesrin.
“Today, we’re gathered here to witness the joining of not only two souls, but three,” he starts, which has me smiling over at Jarred. “It may not be conventional, but the love these three hearts have found is special.”
As the ceremony continues, we hold hands. All three of us. There’s a special moment when the minister stops and asks us to recite the vows we wrote. Finn looks at me as if I’ve just walked out of his dreams.
“I didn’t think we’d get here to be honest,” he says, causing the guests to laugh. “But I’m so glad we did. Nothing in life is easy, it’s messy, it’s painful, and it’s difficult,” he continues with the corner of his mouth tilting upward. “However, with you, with Jarred, it’s all worth it. I’ve never found love before. I’ve never wanted it. Somehow, I didn’t just find one soulmate, I found two. And I’m the luckiest bastard in the world.”