“It’s okay,” she whispered.
“No, it’s not,” I breathed out, my breaths beginning to thicken. “Out there, I can pretend to be okay. But in here,” I tapped the side of my head, “is a whole different story. He will always haunt me.”
“You’ll be fine,” Sawyer went on. “You’re strong. It’s all mind over matter. You got this. You can do this, Scarlett.”
“Right. I can do this,” I said, my panic ebbing away bit by bit.
I repeated the words in my mind over and over, and slowly the panic eased off. It was still there, and would be until this issue passed. But it would pass. I had to keep my mind sane. After it was over, then I could panic.
Yeah, right. I was sure that wouldn’t work like I wanted.
“There ya go,” Sawyer coaxed. “See, nothing to worry about right now.”
“I’m gonna step out in the hallway and make a phone call,” Wyatt said. “Yell if you need me.”
“We’ll be fine,” Sawyer said.
“Told you they’re all a bit protective over me,” I joked, trying to shake my anxiety off. “Just wait till you meet my brother. He’ll make you answer a thousand questions.”
“And you’ll be right there and chew him out for me. So we’re all good,” she replied without a beat. “But I bet we won’t hit it off, because I’m me, and you are, well, you. No one’s gonna like me because I’m happy.”
“Really?” I asked, raising a brow at her, but a small smile creeped on my face.
“Actually, your entire family kinda scares me. They care way too much about you, and I know they’ll want to know every little detail about me. I’m prepared for that time to come, but I’m totally fine with it not happening anytime soon.”
“If I like you, they will all love you,” I said.
Wyatt came back in, plopping down in the chair as if the entire world was about to blow up. For all that mattered, it could.
“Alan sent someone to track you down. Not sure how they found you, but he knows close enough what vicinity you’re in.” I gathered as much, but the news still didn’t sit well. “Caesar found out who the guy is, and it sounds like he hasn’t laid eyes on you just yet. I am planning to keep it that way. If he does happen to set eyes on you, then you need to be relocated as soon as possible.”
“Sorry, Wyatt,” I sighed, dropping my chin. “I just want to live a life without this stuff happening. I don’t want to keep looking over my shoulder. And I don’t want my friends and family in the way of danger.”
“I know, Scarlett. And my mood isn’t the best right now, either.”
“Because of me, I bet?” Sawyer grumbled.
“Because I know the company you keep, little sis,” Wyatt said, “and I don’t want you near her. But I guess it’s too late.”
“Geez. We live next door to each other. What do you expect?”
“Didn’t expect you two to be all buddy buddy,” Wyatt stated with heat. “Scarlett isn’t the type to make friends well.”
“You’re the one who told me to figure out what I wanted. I want friends who will have my back,” I said, leaning forward on the table. Fury was beginning to grow in my veins. “So don’t you dare take this out on your sister.”
“You’re right,” Wyatt said after a moment. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have acted like I did. It’s been a long few days.”
“You know better than to take it out on me,” Sawyer said. “The last time you did that…”
“Yes, I know,” he sighed.
“What have you been doing?” I asked.
“Tracking down a leader for the human trafficking ring Sage was bought from. Zevon can’t do it, given that his hands are a bit full.”
“What have you gotten yourself into, Wyatt?” Sawyer asked, standing quickly and pacing towards him. There was something in her voice that rattled her. Was it about my family?
“Nothing I can’t handle. I’ve been doing this for years, sis. Believe me, this is the easiest thing I’ve had to do so far.”
“I can’t believe you.” Her words were bordering on yelling. “They…” she stopped herself.
“Then don’t. I’m not here to pick a fight with you. With anyone. I’m here per my employer’s request to keep his daughter safe. And I will do that to the best of my ability.”
“I don’t like it.”
“You do stuff I don’t like,” he countered. “And you don’t let me have a say in what you do. So you can’t tell me what to do, either.”
“Knock it off,” I said, leaning back. I didn’t want to listen to them fight. “When was the last time you slept?”
“A while ago,” Wyatt answered.
“Then take my bed.”
“I can’t. Not while there’s a threat out there past these four walls.”
“Then keep watch there while we watch a movie in my room.”
“Fine,” he said. “Keep the door closed.”
“Yes Dad,” Sawyer said as she stood.
It didn’t take long to plug in a movie on the smaller TV my apartment came with. Sawyer happily made herself at home on my bed in the middle, flat on her back. I sat on the other side of her, one foot planted on the floor and the other bent.
“So, how did you meet my brother? He never talks about his work,” Sawyer asked quietly, being careful her voice didn’t travel out of the door.
“He helped my friend get home after he had one too many drinks,” I answered. I left out the part about why Dominic was messed up. “I wasn’t a fan of his at first, but that’s how it is with most males. Wyatt did give me some good advice, and I took it. No one was too pleased about it, but here I am.”
“He told you to come here?”
“Not here, exactly. But to find the help I needed to survive the world. My family isn’t normal, given who they are and what happened to me. I needed to hear those words more than I ever thought I would. I know what I want, I just don’t know how to get that without figuring out who I am first.”
“Huh,” Sawyer said, not having anything to say for once. “That was not what I was expecting.” A moment later, she asked, “What happened to you?”
“I was torn apart from the inside out, and now I’m slowly having to put myself back together,” I summed up. “You know I tried to kill myself, but I think you’re better off not knowing why.”
“We’re here whenever you want to talk about it. That includes Miles, even if he’s not in the room with us,” Sawyer said. “We have our own issues, but we can listen and give advice too.”
“I just don’t want to talk about it.”
“Okay.” After a moment, she went on. “Miles had a concussion from a car accident. He hit his head and had a brain bleed. It caused him to stutter. A year later, he couldn’t deal with being made fun of at school. He dropped out and tried to take pills to kill himself.
“I ran into him shortly after that and we became great friends. And I try really hard to not talk for him, but I know him well enough to know when he gets frustrated so I step in. He knows to tell me if I overstep. Which I have done way too many times. And truthfully, he’s gotten a lot better. Some days are just harder than others.” She paused, thinking for once before she spoke again.