Safeguarding Kelly(37)
Author: Zoe Dawson

 

Already on shaky ground emotionally, Kelly had to swallow before she could answer. “I think he’s the best, too,” she responded unevenly.

 

Her grip tightened with surprising strength, and she continued on as if she hadn’t heard her, her voice hushed. “I think we should all live together.”

 

Her throat tight, Kelly gently smoothed down the baby-soft hair along her temple, nearly overcome with feelings for this child. The awful constriction finally eased, and she brushed her thumb across her smooth cheek as she forced an unsteady smile. “I think we should too,” she whispered shakily.

 

She gazed up at her, then closed her eyes. “You’re the best, too, Mommy.”

 

Feeling more emotionally raw, lonelier than she could ever remember feeling, Kelly continued to stroke her daughter’s face until she heard Kiko’s even breathing. Assured that she was asleep, she carefully pulled the blankets over her, then tucked them around her shoulders. Fighting against the persistent lump in her throat, she leaned over and kissed her on the forehead, so many feelings jammed up in her that she could barely identify them all. Lord, she loved this child of hers.

 

And she loved Jason, aching to have him permanently in her life, in their daughter’s life. She knew this wasn’t going to be easy, but she was going to have to wade through all this stuff before she could make any promises or offer any commitment to Jason. She would have to see how he felt. At the very least, he would want to be part of his daughter’s life. That Kelly was sure about, but where his feelings were for her, Kelly wasn’t sure.

 

Once this case was over, they would have to move forward, no matter what it did to others. If she had to sacrifice to keep both Jason and Kiko happy, so be it.

 

They were the ones who really mattered to her.

 

 

 

 

 

The rain hadn’t abated by morning and the sunrise was a miserable, gloomy gray when Kelly finally rolled onto her back, the bedding crumpled and twisted from a long, sleepless night. She looked toward the window, the sky overcast in so many shades of gray, just like her life right now. Her eyes gritty and her head throbbing, she shoved away the covers and got up, shivering slightly as the early morning air hit her.

 

She rubbed her arms. It was way too early to wake Kiko. She decided to make pancakes for breakfast, but first a shower. She reached for her robe and stood to shrug into it but froze when the warmth of a male palm slipped over her shoulder, then tugged the robe away.

 

“Let me see you, Kelly,” he said as he drew her into his arms. She closed her eyes at his uneven tone. She brushed a kiss against his jaw.

 

“You have to be exhausted. I can make breakfast if you want to get into bed.”

 

Kelly felt him smile as he ran his hand under her top and up her rib cage. “I’ll have you for breakfast,” he said softly.

 

Grinning, she nipped his bottom lip, then looked down up at him, the heavy shadows in the room tinged with a sepia tone from the blinds. “No, I don’t think I’m on the menu right now, Jason. Real breakfast. Pancakes from scratch, fresh strawberries.”

 

He rubbed his hand up and down her rib cage, then stroked the indentation between the two ribs with his thumb, amusement glinting in his eyes. “The real thing, huh?”

 

Kelly kissed the corner of his mouth, a sudden frenzy in her chest leaving her breathless. “The real thing,” she whispered, pretty sure they weren’t still talking about pancakes.

 

His breath faltered, and he caught a handful of hair and pulled her head back, looking into her eyes for several heartbreaking moments, he buried his face into the side of her neck, kissing her, his mouth hot and urgent.

 

Releasing a long sigh, he dragged her hair from her neck before giving her another kiss. “The door’s wide open, babe,” he said gruffly.

 

Weakness flooded through her, and Kelly rolled her head, the feel of his mouth against her neck sending shivers up and down her spine. Barely coherent, she told him about Kiko and how she’d been asking about him. He went still and exhaled in a rush, catching her under the jaw and holding her head as he nuzzled the taut muscle in her neck. Kelly quit breathing altogether.

 

Hauling in a deep breath of air, he forced her head against his shoulder, holding her still. “Kelly,” he whispered, his voice unsteady. “I think you should lock the bedroom door.”

 

Feeling as if every muscle in her body had turned to jelly, she levered herself away from him and went to the door of the room. She closed and locked it, pressing her hand against the wood for a moment.

 

She heard the shower come on, feeling weak at the thought of him touching her, stroking her, making her breathless and shaky.

 

She’d missed his warmth and hadn’t enjoyed waking up to an empty bed. It was shocking how comfortable it had been with him in her house and how much his absence affected her, especially when it had only been a few days.

 

It reminded her what she had been missing all these years, through her pregnancy, which, at times, had been so overwhelming, to her decision to retrain in forensic pathology, to the classes and the residency at the Office of the San Diego County Medical Examiner. She’d cried so hard after Kiko had been born, her heart torn to shreds at having to keep her secret from Jason. Then five more years without him until he’d shown up in her life.

 

Not only had she robbed Jason of time with his daughter, but she’d also robbed her daughter of time with her father. It was clear they were bonding. Kiko had asked after him last night at dinner, then again, this morning. He was sliding into their lives and hearts without even trying.

 

Now she couldn’t imagine losing him again.

 

“Kelly.”

 

Saturated in sensation, her pulse thick and heavy, she opened her eyes and looked at him. He was staring at her from the open bathroom door, his wrist braced high on the frame, his face taut. His pants were undone, and his shirt hung open, and he looked male, aroused, restrained—and hot. He stared at her, and Kelly’s knees went weaker and weaker, then he said, his voice low and strained, “Have a shower with me, babe.”

 

The intent was clear, but so was the fact that he was willing to see him so vulnerable. Unbearable feelings swelling up in her chest, she moved away from the door and pulled off her top. Without making eye contact with him, she put her own vulnerability on the line and released her pajama bottoms, then stepped out of the pool of fabric.

 

A muscle jerked in Jason’s jaw, and he came toward her, his hot gaze drilling into her. Reaching her, he gripped the back of her neck, taking her mouth in a kiss that paralyzed her and made her knees buckle. Expelling a ragged breath into her mouth, he swept her up, then turned toward the bathroom. The room was full of steam, the water from the shower running down the opaque glass in the shower stall, and Kelly hung onto him with a desperate grip. The calluses on his hands were rough against her skin as he dragged his hand across her buttocks, then let her slide down his body, a spasm coursing through him as she turned flush against him. Taking her mouth in another hot, deep kiss, he rubbed his hand over her hips, his breathing arrested as she pushed his arms away, then slid her hands down his shoulders and arms, stripping his shirt from his body. Breathing raggedly against her mouth, he reached for the front of his pants, but Kelly brushed his hands away, needing to do this for him. Needing to create more beautiful memories.