“She pissed on it!” I shout into the phone, ignoring Hanna’s muffled giggling while I stomp around the backyard, leaves crunching under my feet, with the dog I never wanted but have somehow become responsible for. She won’t even allow me to sit on the swing while she goes on her quest for the perfect spot to potty, because she won’t leave my side. She just stands there looking up at me like she has no clue what to do. If she thinks I’m going to piss in the yard to demonstrate, she’s barking up the wrong tree. “I think Ellie’s new dog is stupid.”
“Why do you think that?” Hannah, like Liam, is amused by my distaste for this animal and makes no attempt to hide that fact.
“She stays up my ass no matter how many times I shoo her away and yell at her. She won’t do her business outside unless I’m practically holding her paw, and she peed on her new bedmate!”
“You’re her person. You should be flattered…she chose you, Mama.”
I shake my head as she sniffs the toe of my shoe. “See? Why the hell would she choose me? Estupido!”
Midge finally locates a spot not more than three inches from where I’m standing, effectively distracting me from my call. She sniffs and sniffs, then spins in a complete circle twice before locking eyes with me and crouching her hind legs. I find myself sending up a silent prayer that this is it—that this little patch of grass is what we’ve been searching for, for damn near ten minutes. Then it happens, and I swear a beam of light shoots down from the heavens as she flexes her little stomach muscles, lifts her nubby tail, and makes the tiniest miniature mound of poop! I get the sudden unwelcome urge to lift her into my arms and hug the little monster. I don’t, of course, and I’d never tell a soul the disturbing thought ever crossed my mind. I’ve got a reputation to uphold. “Good girl,” I say instead. “That’s a good doggie!” The beast cocks her head to the side, wagging her whole behind as I praise her for her good deed.
“Annnd she’s a goner,” I hear Hannah say through the speaker of the phone still clutched in my palm, reminding me she’s still on the line.
“Am not.” I lift it back to my ear, heat flaming in my cheeks. “I’m just trying that thing you said to do when she does something I like. Positive reinforcement. Beastie just pooped in the grass! Maybe she’s trainable after all.”
“There just might be hope for you yet.”
“You mean the dog?”
“Her too… Hey, you know there’s nothing wrong with changing your mind, right? About Midge or a certain sexy baby daddy we both know and lo—”
“Hannah…” I do not need this right now.
“I’m just saying, there’s a reason neither of you have ever truly moved on, and I think he’s really sorry. He’s been sorry for a long, long time, actually. Maybe the timing wasn’t right for you two before, but I really think it is now. I just don’t want your stubborn nature to get in the way of your happiness.”
My stomach sinks and absentmindedly I lift the little dog in my hands, placing her in my lap when I sit on the swing. “You know what our divorce did to me last time. I don’t want to go through that again.”
“I don’t think you’ll have to.”
“We just—we work really well apart. You know? We’ve become pretty good friends again and for the most part agree where Ellie is concerned. I don’t want to ruin what we have, and I’m afraid this stupid emotional decision to get married is going to do just that.”
“If you keep treating him like the enemy that’s exactly what’ll happen…”
“Wha—”
“Since the morning you woke up in that gorgeous wedding dress in Vegas, you’ve been giving him the cold shoulder and acting like this is all his fault. Don’t forget the idea was yours; he just went along with it. Because he loves you.”
Maybe I have been a little standoffish and rude. “I’m fucking terrified, Hannah.”
“I know you are. Wasn’t there some really wise man that once said, ‘with great risk comes great reward?’ Are you going to spend the rest of your life alone because you’re afraid?”
A lump forms in my throat. “No. I planned to spend it with Ryder, actually.”
“Yeah… ohhh-kay. Go feed that line of bullshit to someone who will believe it. Gotta go, girlie. One of my patients is paging the nurse’s station.”
Liam
Cookie Jar
“What the heck is that?”
“What’s it look like?” Nya rolls her eyes, squatting beside my desk to finish erecting what appears to be a little pink teepee. She’s crouched over, with her ass in the air, and I’ve physically got to hold myself back to keep from grabbing it. God, I can’t wait til we get past all this preliminary bull and she’s mine enough to touch whenever the mood strikes. Trust me, it strikes often. I may never take my hands off of her.
“Uh…a tent? Is that for Ellie’s dolls? Why’s it in here?”
“It’s Beasty’s new bed.”
I nod, fighting the urge to pick at her for spoiling the puppy already. The last thing I want to do is piss her off again, but I’ve got to say I’m feeling really fucking hopeful. If she can fall for this puppy after claiming to despise it, I can’t help but have faith she might fall for me too. “Hey, darlin’?”
She shoves a fluffy white pillow inside of the tent then glares up at me, quirking a brow.
“What exactly is dick struck?”
The color drains from her cheeks. It takes her a moment to compose herself. “Wh-why do you ask?” She resumes fluffing the dog’s pillow methodically, refusing to make eye contact.
“I don’t know…” I lean back in my office chair, smoothing my hand down my white T-shirt, making sure my flat stomach is nicely displayed. “Didn’t sound like such a bad thing when you and Hannah Banana were discussing the idea this morning.”
“So, you’re eavesdropping on my private conversations now?”
“Yes,” I say simply. “Now back to the topic at hand. If… Beasty—” I glance down at the little furball who is suddenly sporting a pink and cream-colored sweater and a matching gold sequin bow on each ear “—is the only thing standing in the way…”
“She’s not,” Nya snaps.
Right.
“So how does this dick striking thing work? Do I just whip it out and dazzle you with it?” I grip the band of my sweats, slipping both thumbs inside and stretch the elastic out a bit to mess with her.
Flustered, she climbs to her feet giving me the evil eye. “This isn’t funny.”
“No?” I ask, rising to stand right in front of her. “So, you and your friend can discuss me like I’m nothing more than a piece of meat, but I can’t?”
She tugs at the hem of her purple sweater, backing away nervously.
I follow her step for step, til her back is literally against the wall. With the knuckle of my pointer finger, I tilt her face up toward mine. Her big doe eyes are glistening and hooded with desire. “I don’t mind,” I rasp, my pulse thrumming out of control, as her breasts heave against my chest. “I’m a little flattered, actually, that my cock has that kind of power over you.”