I lay beside Hades in bed, our naked bodies tangled up like cords in a drawer. Our faces were close together, and my fingers brushed through his hair as I listened to him breathe. I treasured the sight of this beautiful man because I knew I wouldn’t be able to much longer. I loved everything about him, from his strong chest to his soft heart.
One of his hands rested on my stomach, and it remained there when he fell asleep. He’d been spending more time with Andrew in the last week than he had throughout my entire pregnancy. He slept with me every night, made love to me like I was his wife, and kissed my belly like he couldn’t wait to be a father.
Knowing this was nearly over almost made me cry.
I didn’t want to close my eyes because I didn’t want this memory to pass. But my eyelids grew heavy, and I fell asleep with my hand against his chest. I could feel his heartbeat against my palm, strong as a horse.
But then my eyes snapped open when I felt something.
I was in momentary shock. My mind couldn’t process what had just happened, couldn’t determine if it was a dream or if it was real. But then I felt the sheets grow wet underneath me, and I knew the time had come.
“Oh my god…” My hand moved to my stomach so I could feel Andrew at my fingertips. The moment I’d been waiting for had arrived, and I was both excited and absolutely terrified. For a second, I didn’t know what to do because I was paralyzed by the stress.
Hades must’ve noticed the dampness of the sheets or my frantic movements on the mattress because he opened his eyes and looked at me. After a couple of blinks, he was able to focus his gaze. He touched the wet sheets then moved his hand back to my stomach. He was the exact opposite of me, so calm it was annoying. “Let’s get going.” He got out of bed and grabbed my bag from the closet.
“Do you understand I’m having a baby?” I asked, somewhat hysterically.
“I took a health class in college. Give me more credit than that.” He grabbed a dress from the closet and helped me to my feet so I could get ready. “Let’s get you to the hospital.”
“I’m having a baby…”
He pulled the dress over my head and got me ready when he realized I wasn’t going to do it myself. “Everything’s going to be fine, baby.” He grabbed the bag off the bed and then wrapped his arm around my waist.
“How are you so calm right now?”
“Because I know you’ve got this.” He pulled me in close and kissed my forehead. “We’re about to meet our son.”
I looked up at him, and the confidence in his gaze made me relax. I let the moment between us linger, let the joy last a little longer. I couldn’t imagine loving anyone more than Hades, but I had a feeling that was about to change. “I’m so happy you’re here with me.”
His eyes softened, and he pulled me in for a kiss on the mouth. “Me too.”
After twelve hours in the hospital room, it was finally time for me to start pushing. Every contraction I was subjected to was so painful, it brought tears to my eyes. My body was under such supreme stress, I wasn’t sure how I was going to do this.
Hades sat in the chair at my bedside, dressed in scrubs with his hand in mine. He watched me with steady eyes, seeing the way I breathed into my nose and out my mouth. He gave my hand a gentle squeeze and continued to be a rock under my feet. “The doctor said it’s time to push.”
“It hurts…”
He placed his other hand on mine. “I know. You’ve been at this for twelve hours, and you deserve a medal. But you have to keep going. I know you can do this. You’ve always been a tough-ass woman. This is nothing to you.”
“It’s definitely not nothing…”
“Andrew has to get out of there, and the sooner it happens, the sooner he’ll be in your arms.”
I sighed because the comment went straight to my heart.
“It’s time for both of us to meet our son. You can do it, baby.”
After Hades gave me the pep talk I needed, I pushed through and made it happen.
Thirteen hours after my labor started, Andrew Lombardi was born.
He rested in both of my arms at the perfect size. He had ten fingers and ten toes, and it was clear he was a healthy baby. It took so much work to get him here, but he was more beautiful than I ever could’ve imagined.
He opened his eyes, and of course, he had Hades’s coffee-colored eyes. “He looks just like you.” That was exactly what I wanted, for my son to look like his father. Now I could see Hades every day, even if he was nowhere nearby. A piece of him would always be with me, no matter what the future brought. I brought Andrew close to me and placed a kiss on his forehead. All the instinctive feelings mothers described were true.
I would never love anyone the way I loved him.
Without even realizing it, I had tears on my cheeks. They were even in my heart. The pain of labor was quickly forgotten because I was so happy to have this little baby in my arms. He was a precious gift, an unexpected surprise.
Hades was quiet as he watched me hold our son. Wordless and still, he was like a spectator at an event, experiencing the moment from a short distance. He let me have all the time I wanted without asking for his chance to hold the baby.
Now that I had him, I never wanted to let him go.
“He’s beautiful, isn’t he?”
Hades was still quiet, absorbing the moment at his own pace. “Yeah…he is.”
“I know I should hand him over, but I don’t want to.”
He chuckled quietly before he placed his hand on Andrew’s stomach. Hades’s fingers were so large compared to our son’s small size. He could pick him up with a single hand so easily. “That’s okay. You’ve earned this.”
I kissed Andrew on the head one more time before I handed him over. “Andrew, this is your father.”
Like a natural, Hades took him like he’d done this a million times. He cradled his head and the rest of his body, and then brought him into his chest with a single arm. He rested back against the chair and made sure the blanket was wrapped tightly. Then he was quiet as he regarded our son, studying his face like it was the most interesting thing he’d ever seen. His other hand rested on his stomach so his thumb could feel our boy’s little heartbeat. Hades showed no emotion and kept everything beneath the surface, but a few thoughts escaped his eyes. There was so much love there, pure and whole love. He used to look at me that way from across the room when he was stuck in a conversation he didn’t want to be a part of. But now he looked at Andrew that way because I wasn’t the only person in his heart anymore.
I’d been replaced.
Hades continued to stare at Andrew with no signs of stopping. He took to his role so well, instantly looking like a father with no effort at all.
I wished every day could be like this…that Hades would come home from work and pick up our son out of the crib. I wished he were still my husband, the person I would grow old with.
The thought was so painful I couldn’t bear it. I wiped the thoughts from my brain and just concentrated on the scene in front of me. My heart rate gradually slowed as peace descended. Before I knew what happened, I drifted off to sleep.