Cole hadn’t been disgusted with her. Hadn’t looked at her with pity. If she wasn’t mistaken, she’d seen pride in his gaze.
It was crazy. Even when she’d admitted that he’d been the one to keep the darkness at bay, he hadn’t laughed at her and told her she was losing it.
Avery closed her eyes and relaxed into his warm body. Usually after waking up from one of her nightmares, she wasn’t able to fall back asleep, but amazingly, she knew she was moments away from doing just that.
And it was because of the man at her side. He made all the difference. She was safe with him. He wouldn’t let the mysterious traitor lock her away in the dark again.
She hated relying on someone else, on a man, to keep her safe. But she knew he was right. Eventually, she’d be able to stand on her own two feet again, or sleep on her own as the case may be. But for now, she was all right with him being there to chase away the demons and things that went bump in the night.
Cole opening up and telling her the story about his own capture, and how vulnerable it had made him feel, made her feel less alone. Stronger somehow.
Moving her hand, Avery realized she was touching cotton instead of his soft skin. Without thought, she moved her hand up and under his shirt, resting her palm against his six-pack abs. She felt and heard him inhale deeply, but then his fingers intertwined with hers on his belly under his shirt.
Holding his hand, hearing his heart beat under her cheek, and feeling the tickle of his beard against her head all combined to make her feel snug and safe.
“Go back to sleep, sweetheart. I’ve got you.”
Those were the last words she heard as her body succumbed to the lure of sleep it had long been denied.
Chapter Seventeen
A week later, Avery stood in the hallway leading out to the main living area and watched as Cole scuttled around her kitchen. He sipped his cup of coffee as he stood in front of her stove, cooking bacon. She knew the second he realized she was awake he’d crack a few eggs in a pan and start a simple omelet of eggs, cheese, and tomatoes for her.
She’d thought it would be awkward to wake up with Cole that first time, but he’d gone out of his way to make it seem as if he always got called in the middle of the night to soothe his freaked-out girlfriend.
He’d spent every night with her since. She’d slept like a log and woke up refreshed and ready to face each day. Without any kind of discussion, he’d brought some of his things over, like soap, his toothbrush, and a few changes of clothes.
And Avery had never been happier.
That alone was kinda freaking her out. This wasn’t how relationships worked. They were doing everything backward. Living together before they’d really gotten to know each other. Sleeping together before sleeping together.
Although, the not knowing each other was a lie. She’d spent so much time with Cole, talking and laughing, that she honestly knew him better than any other man she’d dated. He was down-to-earth, could be silly, was fiercely devoted to his friends. He was considerate. He’d eaten her out of house and home, but he was also generous, shopping for them, not seeming to care how much groceries cost, and he’d filled her car up with gas to boot.
Avery kept waiting for him to do something that would turn her off. Would make him seem less like a paragon of men and more like an annoying…guy. But so far that hadn’t happened.
She knew she was being unfair to herself, but at the moment, she felt as if she was the one with all the flaws in the relationship.
“Morning,” Cole said, startling Avery.
He was smiling at her from his place in front of the stove, and she saw that he’d already started her omelet. “Good morning,” she said, walking toward the kitchen.
“Sleep all right?” he asked, just as he did every morning.
“You know I did,” she replied a little snarkily. She never would’ve thought it possible, but every night when they went to her bedroom and snuggled, the second she closed her eyes, she was out like a light. And even when she woke up with a nightmare, knowing she was safe in his arms made her able to fall right back to sleep, something that had been impossible before he’d started spending the night.
When she got near him, he snaked out an arm and pulled her into his side. He leaned in and kissed her as if it was no big deal. And Avery supposed it wasn’t. He’d been doing that for a week. Kissing her lightly and frequently every chance he got.
When he dropped her off at the hospital, he leaned over and kissed her before she got out of his car.
When he picked her up, another kiss.
After she’d spent time at the police station going over photos, he kissed her.
Before dinner.
After dinner.
While they were watching TV.
When she was snuggled next to him in her bed.
Avery couldn’t say she didn’t like it, but she was frustrated that he never took his kisses deeper. Not like they’d shared before she’d had her freak-out. It was always a quick peck on the lips. His beard and mustache lightly tickling her before he’d back off.
She missed his hand on the back of her neck, holding her to him as he tilted her head exactly where he wanted it and kissed her as if he’d never get enough.
“You’re only working a half shift today, right?” he asked.
Avery nodded and sipped the cup of coffee he’d prepared for her.
“And then you want to spend an hour or so at the police station?”
“Yeah,” she told him. “I’m down to the last of the pictures. I’d like to finish up.”
He frowned. “And no one seems familiar?”
Avery sighed. “No. And it sucks. I thought for sure I’d recognize the guy immediately when I saw him. But I’ve been through all the navy photos and I’m pretty sure the guy I saw wasn’t there. Now I’ve only got a few of the army and civilian guys left to look through.” She put down her cup of coffee. “What am I going to do if I can’t find him, Cole? The first unit will be leaving Afghanistan soon. Be honest, do you really think I’ll be in danger?”
She watched as Cole turned off the heat on the stove and slid a perfectly cooked omelet onto a plate. He turned to her and put his hands on her shoulders. He was wearing a tan T-shirt and his blue camo pants. He’d managed to shower without her hearing him, and she could smell his fresh, clean scent. It made her want to bury her face into his neck and just stay there the rest of the day, smelling him.
“There’s a chance, yes,” he said solemnly. “I wish like hell I could tell you that you’ll be fine, but, Avery, you were the one who told us what the Afghani said to you. That he’d been instructed to make sure you didn’t make it out of the country alive. The traitor obviously knows who you are, and if you can’t identify him, that puts you in danger.”
“I can identify him,” Avery insisted. “If I see him again. Just like people said, the official DOD photos are very staged and probably look nothing like the person does in real life. I bet I would hardly recognize you if I saw yours.”
Cole smirked.
“See? I’m right,” she said with a huff.
“I know you are. I don’t have a beard or mustache in mine,” Cole told her.
Avery’s eyes widened. “Seriously? I really want to see it now.”