Most couples are probably at work, or sat watching TV and arguing over the remote. I’m not. I’m in a fairy-tale.
I’m in a forest, in a tree house, reading Peter Pan to the man who loves me.
Will it be like this forever, minus the heartache that both of us feel over our pasts? Right now I don’t feel heartache for anyone but him. Out here I’m no longer Guinevere, Mum to Dillan, widow to Caleb and heartbroken beyond repair.
Out here I’m just Gwen who loves Nathan.
I’m sorry, Caleb, I can’t go back now. Plus, I don’t want to.
Please, don’t hate me. I can’t help how I feel.
An hour passes by and even though my arse is starting to go numb, I continue reading. Nathan seems content to stroke the top of my cleavage or my hair whilst listening silently. I don’t want to stop but I’m starting to get tired.
Nathan, sensing my need to take a break, pulls the book from my hands and moves to place it back in the trunk. I lie flat and stretch my body like a cat.
“Thank you.” He smiles softly and lies beside me. “We should head back.”
“Yeah,” I reluctantly agree, not wanting to leave. I feel so disconnected from the world here. I can see why Nathan claimed this as his safe place.
He stands, pulling me with him, and stretches just like I did moments ago. Without another word, he grabs the bag and leads me to the ladder, climbing down a few steps. He waits for me to follow and holds my dress out of the way.
“I received a call after we had sex,” Nathan says when I reach the ground. He takes my hand and leads me back the way we came.
Had sex? Well, I suppose that’s true. We didn’t make love and he didn’t orgasm, so calling it sex sounds about right. “Go on.”
“That house that we viewed on the seafront.” Why does he keep trailing off?
“Go on.”
“It’s mine. I get the keys tomorrow.” He looks nervously at me. “How do you feel about that?”
Good question. “I think it’s nice that you’re going to be closer.” Then another thought enters my head. “What about your jewellery store? What’s going to happen to that?”
“That’s on hold indefinitely.” He waves it away like it’s nothing more than a bug. What the hell? I open my mouth to argue, but he speaks first. “I want you to move in with me. You and Dillan.”
And we’re back to this. “I don’t need to live with you, Nathan.”
He stops, turning me to face him, and bends slightly so his eyes are level with mine. “But I want you to. Both of you. That house is too big for just me.”
“How are you paying for it exactly? You’re not working right now.”
“Gwen,” he warns, as a way of telling me not to change the subject.
Sigh. “It’s not the right time. I just… we’re new.”
“Hardly! We lived together for almost six months.”
“Yes, I’m aware of that.”
“Look…” He runs his hand through his hair. “I was thinking you could finish University. I’ll have Dillan for you, or we’ll pay for nursery.”
Wow. “I… I’m not going to move in with you just because you’re offering me something. It has to be the right time. Now isn’t that time.” I’m not doing a very good job of explaining my point.
“I’ll let you decorate; we can have the kitchen redone or anything you want. Dillan will have his own room. It’ll be better than before.”
“I hardly saw you before and we weren’t planning on becoming an item, so the comparison doesn’t really count,” I say, needing this conversation to end. “One day, but not now. Okay?”
“Fine,” he relents, clearly not wanting to push the subject. “But promise me you’ll think about it.”
That I can do. “I promise.”
He smiles, relieved, and starts walking again.
By the time we make it home it’s dark and late. We get Dillan ready and go straight to bed, because I have work in the morning and Nathan has a house to prepare.
I burrow into Nathan’s chest, loving the feel of his arms around me. I guess I didn’t realise how much I’d missed this. I can’t even remember Caleb’s arms around me anymore. Why do I suddenly feel guilty?
I stare up at the handsome man who seems to be staring at the ceiling, holding me like he doesn’t want to let me go.
“Tell me you love me,” are the last words he whispers to me before we sleep.
“I love you, Nathan,” are the last words I whisper to him. His arms tighten around me and his lips connect with my forehead.
“Hey, I’m home.” A soft voice whispers into the darkness.
I smile and turn to the side, puckering my lips in acceptance of the kiss that I know is to come.
It doesn’t.
Peeling my eyes open, I look at the figure looming over the bed. I can’t see his face, but I know who it is.
“Caleb!” I grin, clambering from the bed and throwing my arms around him. I bury my face in his neck and inhale deeply; he smells so good. He always does. “I miss you.”
His face finally comes into view. He’s smiling. It tears at my heart but I can’t quite put my finger on why. “You miss me? I’m right here.” A warm hand cups my cheek. “You look so beautiful.”
“Can you kiss me now? I feel like you haven’t kissed me in so long,” I whisper, pain flooding through me. Why do I feel grief?
“Certainly.” He grins wickedly and his other hand comes to my other cheek. His lips descend. My entire body heats as I wait for our lips to touch. I feel like I’ve been waiting for this moment for a lifetime. Why am I so sad?
Our lips are about to touch. I shiver in anticipation.
They stop.
Caleb looks over my shoulder, his eyes narrowing and his head tilting. “You’re not alone.”
“What?” What’s he talking about? Of course I’m alone.
I look over my shoulder and gasp at the sight before me. He’s right. Somebody is in my bed.
“What the hell?” I whisper as Caleb moves me to the side, his arms trembling, and reaches for the blanket. He pulls it back in one swift movement and the room fills with a rage that’s so thick I can taste it.
A red mist seems to swirl around him as he glares at the man in my bed.
“No!” Caleb roars, his angry eyes coming to me. “You promised.”
“What?” Who is that? Why’s he in my bed. “Who is it?”
“We’re getting married tomorrow! How could you?”
“I don’t understand. I don’t know who this is.”
“I told you to stay away from Nathan. You promised you would!” His tone is accusatory.
What? “I don’t know who Nathan is. I swear. I don’t know this man.”
Caleb steps away from me. “How could you do this?”
“I… I didn’t… Caleb, please.” I hold out my hand. “Believe me.”
He turns and walks over to my window. Wait… where’s the cot? Don’t I have a cot there?
Why would I have a cot? I’m still pregnant.