I walk to the couch and gently move Carson from Landon’s side. Landon wakes up with a startle before wiping the sleep from his eyes. He shifts his weight to meet my gaze.
“Here, let me do it.” Before I have a chance to argue with him over it he takes him from my arms and walks down the hall. I rush to get ahead of him to pull the covers back for Carson. Landon easily slides him in and I pull the covers up to his chin like he likes it and tightly tuck him in on each side. I lean up and brush the hair from his forehead and place a kiss there.
“Goodnight, Momma,” my son says as we walk toward the door.
“Goodnight, baby boy.” I smile as I say it.
“Goodnight, Daddy,” Carson says and Landon and I both freeze. My eyes go wide. Panic sets in. Not only for me or my son, but for Landon. Carson has never had a father figure and I knew something like this would happen if I let Landon get too close.
“Night, bud.” Landon smiles down at me, but his smile isn’t as bright as usual. I step into the hall, closing Carson’s door behind me quietly.
Landon is sitting on the couch, his elbows on his knees and his face resting in his hands. I slowly move to take a seat next to him on the couch.
“Landon, I –“
He cuts me off, turning toward me he takes my hands in his own. His large ones are so warm and calloused. “I’m scared you’re going to panic and pull back now.” I’m frozen. Stunned really.
“What? I’m scared that this is too much for you,” I say.
“Not at all. I’d be happy for the little guy to call me Dad. I know it’s too soon, but it doesn’t bother me at all. He deserves a dad that cares.”
“How do we move forward now? I’ve never done this before, Landon. I’m kind of freaking out.”
He moves so he is kneeling on the floor directly in front me. He grabs my face between his hands and forces my gaze to his.
“Don’t freak out. I want this, Kels. If I didn’t, I’d have been gone a long time ago. You and Carson are all I think about. I mean, I plan dates with him in mind because I know that he is a permanent fixture. I want this to go far. What I’m feeling right now…” He moves my hand to his heart and holds it there. His strong heart beats against my palm. “This is real. I’ve never felt this way before and don’t want to lose it.”
I stare at him, stunned by his small speech. I lean in and brush my lips across his. His hands move up my bare legs and continue to slide until they reach my hips. We continue kissing, and when my tongue brushes against his I lose all self-restraint. I grab his face between my hands and force him to stand as I do.
I walk him backward toward my bedroom. He turns me and presses me up against the door, his mouth moving down my neck. His hand reaches behind me and turns the doorknob. I gasp, expecting to fall, but at the same time Landon’s hands move over my ass and lift me in one quick motion. My legs wrap around his waist and my lips are back on his.
He moves quickly, pressing the door shut then walking to the side of my bed. He gently lays me on the comforter and stares at me for what seems like an eternity. So much is passing between us in this moment.
My eyes stay locked on his as I slowly lift the bottom of his shirt. He reaches behind his neck and tugs the collar up and over his head. His shirt falls to the ground and my eyes move from his, down his torso. His muscles are so well defined and broad. He has the most gorgeous eight pack I have ever seen, not that I’ve seen many. Kyle wasn’t much of a looker.
Landon leans down, gently raising my shirt and pressing soft kisses all along the faint scarring of stretch marks. He continues lifting my shirt up and tugs it over my head. I raise up and reach behind me, unhooking my bra clasp. He gently moves his fingers over my shoulder, pulling the straps down with him. A small groan escapes his lips when he finally gets full sight of my boobs.
I undo the button of my jean shorts and shimmy slightly to get them down my hips. His eyes connect with mine again as he hooks a thumb in each side of my underwear and pulls them down.
His hands roam up my body, settling when he cups one of my breasts in his large hand and squeezes slightly. A soft whimper moves past my lips as his finger brushes across my nipple. His mouth moves to mine, catching the whimper, his tongue working frantically against mine before he moves to my neck again. He continues working his lips over my skin until he reaches my nipple. He softly bites it, causing my back to arch. I reach out and fist the comforter beneath me. He groans before shifting to my other nipple and doing the same thing. His tongue swirls around before he sucks it hard into his mouth.
My hands move to his hair and I tug it gently. He continues his assault to my body as he moves lower. I raise up to my elbows as he blows against my middle. My head falls back and my eyes close involuntarily. I’ve never been a vocal person while having sex, but the moment Landon’s mouth makes contact with me, I damn near come off the bed. My legs squeeze against his head and I hear him chuckle. The vibration sends shivers up my spine. He continues until I physically can’t take any more and push him away.
He stands to his full height beside the bed and slowly un-does the button of his jeans. I watch as he pulls a condom from his wallet before tossing it on the nightstand and allowing his pants fall to the floor. He brings the condom to his lips and his perfect teeth rip the package open, he slides the condom down his length and crawls over my body, forcing me to lay back down. He kisses me sweetly, then look directly into my eyes.
“Are you sure?” His gaze bounces back and forth over my eyes.
“Positive,” I assure him. His lips press to mine in a deep kiss as he lines himself up with my center and slowly pushes in. He holds himself there so I can adjust to his size. My god, he is huge, but he feels so good.
He slowly pulls out before moving back in. I groan as he slides back in and moves his mouth over mine again. I wrap my arms around his neck and begin shifting my hips along with him.
He kisses down my neck, never losing the force of his thrusts. Each one causes my eyes to roll back, and when he moves his hand down and presses a thumb against my clit, I lose control.
“Come for me, baby.” His voice is deep and breathless. It sends me over the edge, and he follows suit. I come for what seems like forever. After Landon collapses on me, he pulls out and just lays his head against my chest. Our breathing is in perfect sync and I draw lazy circles across the skin of his back.
Eventually, he moves off of me and walks to the bathroom, where he disposes of the condom and brings a warm rag back. He gently wipes between my legs before tossing the rag in the corner of the room. He slips his boxers back on and hands me my underwear and his T-shirt. I quickly slip both on and move up toward the headboard.
Landon raises the blanket for me to slide under and then wraps me in his arms.
Having him here makes me happy. I feel content with how my life is in this moment. I’m trying to go with the flow and not panic at the changes that have been taking place. I rub my hand across his stomach and the beat of his heart eventually lulls me to sleep.
I wake to the smell of bacon floating throughout the house. I wipe the sleep from the corners of my eyes and glance around the room. Landon’s side of the bed is empty and his jeans are missing. Waking up throughout the night to check on Carson wore me out, add that to the stress I had yesterday and I was dead to the world when I passed out.