Fancy seeing you here, in the place where we took all each other’s firsts.
“Okay girls,” I say. “Let’s get back to the cabin. Plenty of unpacking still to do.”
They don’t argue, and I move quickly to lead them away from the parking lot and back into camp. There’s a brief shadow of disappointment on Eric’s face, and it’s like a punch in the gut. But I need more time to figure out what the hell I’m going to say to him. And frankly, if we’re going to have any kind of reunion at all, I don’t want it to have an audience.
“Who was that?” One of the girls—Margot I think—asks.
Emily laughs. “I have no idea but he’s fucking hot.”
I clear my throat. “I’m assuming he’s another counselor.” It’s plain to anyone with eyes that Eric is hot. Smoking hot. Center of the sun fucking hot. But I don’t want them getting any ideas either. The last thing I need—the last thing Eric needs—is to have teenage girls hitting on him all summer. It will still probably happen, but at least I can make it clear that he’s off limits from the beginning.
Sure enough I see a pout form on Margot’s face. But I ignore it. There’s only one real thought running through my mind. Why is he here? Why is he here? Why is he here?
What kind of curveball is the universe trying to throw at me? If Leena knew that he was here, and I was here, she’d throw a fit. My stomach flips, and I already know that I’m not going to tell her. There’s a strange sort of relief in that.
I’ve wanted to see Eric forever, and this is one of the only ways it could have happened that makes sure there’s no interference. I just need to make sure that he’s okay. That he’s happy. At least that’s what I’m currently telling myself. Closure. That’s what I need. Long overdue closure. Sure.
The devil himself wouldn’t believe that lie.
We all file into the cabin, and I step into my private room and shut the door, leaning my forehead on the cool wood of the door. In the sudden silence I can hear the way my heart is pounding.
This is the last thing that I expected.
Even here in this cabin the memories are pressing in, and I don’t have a choice but to let them flood my mind. They’re so visceral it feels like everything happened yesterday even thought it was six years ago. Every scent and breath feels like I’m breathing it now. I’ve fought this for so long, it feels good to remember.
3
Persephone
Six Years Ago
I drop my backpack on the bunk harder than I meant to, jangling everything that is inside. But it does the trick of taking the edge off the frustration I’m feeling of being here yet again.
Red Rock Summer Camp is cool. Or was cool. But now that I’m a junior, everything seems small. Especially in comparison to Leena’s vacation. She’s going to be sending me pictures from Paris with the Eiffel Tower and sneaking sips of wine at vineyards, and I’m going to be sweating in the Georgia heat.
And the worst part is that Leena could care less about spending time in another country. Her parents take her on some exotic vacation every year. And I’ve barely left the state. All I want is to travel and write about it. I want to be able to paint pictures of gorgeous Italian frescoes and the way the sunset whines through a glass of white wine on a stranger’s table.
I unzip my backpack and dig out the notebook I was going use on that trip. I’m still going to write—I refuse to stop just because I didn’t get lucky. There are still beautiful things at Red Rock, and I’m going to practice getting them all down. Going to make the best of it. What else can I do?
Five more minutes of moping and then I’ll find the silver lining. I have to. Nothing but silver and gold linings from here on out. I grab a pen from my backpack and slip it into the binding of the notebook. There probably won’t be many places I go without it while I’m here—except for the lake where it could get destroyed.
Okay, I think to myself. Time to get out there and stop wishing you were somewhere else. You’re here now. Look on the bright side.
I take a deep breath as I step out of the cabin. It’s a gorgeous day with perfect sun, and unlike some of the days that can be spent here, it’s not blistering hot. It’s pleasantly warm, and I close my eyes to bask in it for a moment before stepping forward to head to my favorite grove in the woods.
It’s a mistake not to open my eyes.
Something slams into me so hard that I see stars through the brightness, and I don’t even remember moving. Suddenly I’m on the ground staring up into the sun. A shadow looms out of the sun, and I blink. Somehow I can’t still breathe. What the fuck happened?
The shadow solidifies into a face, and now I can’t breathe for a different reason. It’s a boy I’ve never seen before…and he’s gorgeous. Haloed by golden light, his hair looks that much darker, and his eyes are so blue they match that perfect clear sky that I had seen just before whatever happened…happened.
His mouth is moving, but I can’t seem to focus on what he’s saying. My ears are ringing and I blink once. Twice. The shapes of his words are coming though now.
“What?”
My own voice sounds muffled, and then clears and I hear his voice. It’s strong and musical. “Your nose is bleeding.”
His hands are on my shoulders, helping me to sit up, and I realize that he’s right. Liquid pours down my face and I look down in horror and the blood that’s collecting on my new camp shirt. “I am so sorry,” the boy says. “Are you okay? Can I take you to the nurse?”
I stand in a daze. Around us other campers have stopped to look, mostly just watching me bleed. A few others are laughing at either him or me. I’m not sure what to do or what happened. I’m still in a daze.
“Here,” he says, fingers grazing my arm, “let’s go to the nurse.”
We take all of one step together when another voice descends, loud and brassy. “What happened?”
“It was an accident—” he says.
Hands clamp down on my shoulders. “We’ll figure it out later, she needs to get to the nurse now.”
“That’s where I was taking—wait!”
I twist to look back at him—the handsome boy with the blue eyes, but I’m already too far away to hear what he’s saying. The counselor is marching me across the camp at a pace I can barely keep up with. My ears are still ringing, and the blood on my face feels thick.
Now that I’m coming out of it my nose is starting to hurt. I don’t think it’s broken, but I guess I wouldn’t really know, having never broken a nose before.
I’m one of the lucky ones. I’ve only had to be in the nurse’s cabin a couple times in the years that I’ve been coming to Red Rock. It’s a small cabin on the edge, and an older woman has been the nurse for as long as I’ve been coming here.
“Mabel,” the counselor says, guiding me through the door. “We’ve got a live one.”
The nurse turns with a smile, and she doesn’t look remotely concerned when she sees me standing there covered in blood. “Thank you, Jennifer. I’ll take it from here.”