Their breathing was getting heavier, and Ana could feel herself climbing towards the most intense orgasm of her life.
‘I’m going to come, Joel, yes, come with me… please,’ she said, arching back, thrusting herself harder towards him, wanting him to go deeper and deeper. At that moment both their bodies jerked and climaxed together as they kissed, searching for each other, burying their faces in one another, never wanting to let go. Joel held her tight, their sweat sticking them together, lost in a sea of passion and desire.
As he slowly pulled himself out of her, he glanced at her with a satisfied smile and said, ‘Well, that was worth the wait, don’t you think?’
She giggled coyly. ‘Hmmm, I think so, and maybe you getting some practice in wasn’t such a bad thing after all,’ and she leaned forward and kissed him again. As her senses returned, she became conscious that they were in a library at a birthday party and that for all the pleasure of their indulgence, she did not wish to be caught in flagrante delicto. This guilt triggered a reminder of Rex who was probably asleep at home dreaming of being a father to the foetus she was now coming to be convinced was gestating within. She wriggled away and pulled herself reluctantly into her dress. She couldn’t find her underwear but was too sated and soporific to stress.
He pulled her towards him again and kissed her. ‘If you don’t want this to carry on forever, you’ll have to stop me because you really are quite irresistible.’
‘Ever the romantic. This is all—’ she paused and looked him in the eyes, her hands stroking his face. ‘Well, it’s a lot to take in, Joel – suddenly everything I have ever wanted is right here in front of me, and I don’t even know how I feel. I think overwhelmed, and excited and like I just need to freshen up,’ she said with a flirtatious smile, as she kissed him on the lips. ‘I’ll meet you outside on that bench we were on. I’m just going to take five and I don’t want to come back and find you surrounded by groupies. OK?’ She stroked his head with a loving tenderness, and then laughed and was surprised to see fear in his eyes.
‘I have no intention of losing you again, Ana,’ Joel said as he grabbed her hand. ‘Never again.’ Ana felt her stomach turn as she looked deep into his eyes and felt a depth of trust and longing she’d never felt before. She wished she’d had time to be totally honest about Rex. Oh god. Poor Rex. What was she going to do about Rex? She wanted to confess everything to Joel about him, the baby, her indecision, but she didn’t trust herself right then. She was drowning in the aftershock of their sexual union. She didn’t feel herself. She didn’t trust herself. She felt out of control and she wasn’t comfortable.
‘You won’t,’ she said, turning on her heel, her heart pounding, not knowing whether she meant it or not.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Dixie
Boom!
They were still in the secret garden when the first fireworks went up over the big house to celebrate the midnight of Freddie’s 45th birthday, and the crowd, led by a soprano from the Met finished an a capella version of ‘Happy Birthday’, before the DJ (one of Freddie’s old uni mates) launched into a mildly ironic remix of Destiny’s Child’s, ‘Survivor’. It was a good-humoured singalong.
‘Freddie… you’re a miracle! This is… I don’t know. You are such a dark horse. You never stop surprising me.’
Dixie was draped around Freddie’s neck like a scarf. She was a little drunk, and very loved up, but it just felt so good. As he grinned at everyone, his long fingers slid in through the cut-out keyhole on the back of her dress, reaching round, pulling her closer.
‘Do you want your birthday present?’ she asked.
He nuzzled her neck, inhaling.
‘My birthday present?’
‘Well, second present. Some presents are things, trinkets, souvenirs, and others are experiences. I want to give you something you’ve never had before, something you’ll never forget.’
She ground against him, drunk with desire, lost in the moment.
Dixie was having the best night of her life. She thought she’d lived a pretty wild life, been to the high side, walked with some low-lifes, but this was next level, or so it seemed to her lust-heightened, champagne-fuelled consciousness. The chateau was movie-set fantastic. The evening was perfect. The sky clear and the air warm and the people so much fun. Freddie was such a joy to be with. He was funny and attentive, but never needy or cloying. She was having a great time. As, probably, was Ana who’d disappeared, but Dixie had a pretty good idea what she was up to. Little minx.
‘What about Rex?’ Freddie had asked. ‘Isn’t he your friend too?’
‘Hierarchies, Freddie. My first duty is to Ana, and if Rex and Ana’s relationship isn’t strong enough to endure a single encounter with Joel, then all we’ve done is save them both a lifetime of heartache.’
He hadn’t looked convinced.
‘But you’re interfering. It’s pretty manipulative. I mean you set them up. Poor Ana.’
‘Why do you care so much about Ana? Has Freddie got a little friend crush?’
‘Don’t be silly. Relationships are always complex. People have to make difficult decisions. What if Ana and Rex are just having a wobble and without your interference they’d be fine?’
Dixie had kissed him and told him how adorable his decency was. He’d turned away.
Stella, fortunately, was on the most incredible form. It was literally like the old days. Late-Nineties-Stella had so many drinks on the go she didn’t know which was left and which was right. She looked amazing in a kind of Marianne Faithfull meets Stevie Nicks kind of way. Dixie watched her dancing, perhaps a little too enthusiastically, with Xavier, who was still wearing linen, but an evening wear version of it in layered blacks and blues. Her neon-pink bra shone through the sheer nude T-shirt. Her flares were something people would write about in fashion magazines in years to come. Right on the edge of disaster, they were an era-defining triumph because they so captured her attitude. She was head-banging to Bon Jovi. Luckily Dixie couldn’t hear her over the PA, but their eyes met and Stella mouthed, ‘You give love a bad name,’ before returning to her air guitar.
‘Come,’ she said to Freddie. ‘Let’s go join Stella. I want to see your air guitar.’ She reached up and nibbled at his earlobe.
‘Let’s do it.’
They joined Stella, who screamed, dropping to her knees, ‘Freddie Fan-Dango, would you like to do the tango!’ She stuck out her infeasibly long tongue and mimed some kind of inappropriate cunnilingus. Freddie laughed and helped her to her feet.
‘Dix warned me a free bar might be a mistake.’
‘I. Have. Only. Just. Started,’ hiccuped Stella.
‘Come,’ said Freddie. ‘Let’s get some hydration.’
‘Champagne! Great idea. You know what, I like you, Freddie. Most of Dixie’s men are B-list arseholes, but you’re all right. You’re A-OK. A as in A-list,’ she hiccuped, ‘not arsehole.’
Stella folded double in hilarity at herself.
‘Is she always like this?’ asked Freddie over her head as they wound their way back into the ballroom. The bright lights were a bit of a shock and Dixie felt a tremor of fear as Stella wobbled away with Xavier across the parquet floor.