I’ve had that same dream for the last two weeks. It’s like the minute Krishna came back from Paris with Mitch the little bit of sleep I got had been ruined by replays of that damn voicemail.
Since that dreadful night I haven’t been able to delete it. I kept her phone on for years just to call and hear her voice on the voicemail. Nesha dying had been the final nail in the coffin for me. Everyone I loved except my brothers had died and I couldn’t do anything to save them. If I managed to save Cassian and Atlas from my father, why wasn’t I able to do the same thing for O’Nesha and Odom?
Then to make it worse, once again JD found his hardheaded ass in trouble with his grandmother for getting caught with three girls in the house. This boy had keys to my downtown condo, a car, and a debit card linked to my accounts. Why in the hell did he keep going to her house to have sex? And a damn threesome under her roof?
JD messed up by continuing to get in trouble. He wouldn’t tell me what was going on with him, so I started to pay close attention. I noticed a pattern with him. He’d have this rush of girls and then became distant. He wouldn’t answer my calls and would go completely ghost. A repeated cycle that told me something was wrong.
JD’s issues and then dreams of his mother.
I felt like I was floating in the eye of the storm.
Krishna laid next to me fast asleep. Things had been good between us. She made it clearly known that she loved being here with me, but I honestly felt the opposite. I felt bad ignoring her when she told me that Mitch okayed her to move here. I wanted her and all the rest of the women and children far away from here until the uneasy feeling left.
Making sure she was good, I slipped out and walked around my house.
Check the security cameras and saw Amp pulling up.
“What’s up, Amp.”
“JD is set up in the condo. I took his keys and phone. His grandmother kicked him out for that shit he pulled.” He handed me JD’s things.
Early this evening I took Krishna out to the drive-in movie theater. We were cuddled up in the back of my truck when I got the call from his grandmother saying that her and her church friends walked in on him sexing three girls on her new couch.
Right then I had a choice to make. I promised Krishna I’d learn to balance so for the first time ever I leaned on the help given to me and called Amp to deal with JD while I spent my night with my lady. JD wasn’t going anywhere if Amp locked him in the condo.
“Thanks, preciate you.” I waited until he drove off to pull out my iPad and check my camera feed. Not just my house but my brothers and Mitch’s.
I walked around the entire compound deep in prayer.
My spirit felt heavy.
My heart felt heavy.
“Can’t sleep either?” Cassian said. At the four way stop sign to our houses my brothers and I all met in the middle. It was damn near three in the morning and none of us were able to sleep.
“Aye, listen to this crazy dream I had just now.” Atlas stated. “I had a dream…”
“Alright Doctor King.” Cassian teased.
“Shut up. Anyway, I had a dream of fish. This tank of fish was right in front of me and every time I tried to walk around it another appears with more fish. Then one of them jumped out and into my arms. I tossed that bitch back so damn fast.
We don’t need no more kids.” He shook his head looking back at his house.
“Well, Noe is already pregnant. She can deny it all she wants but I intentionally shot up her club and don’t you try to Iyanla Vanzant me either, Amell.” Leave it to Cassian to purposely get Noelani pregnant knowing damn well she wasn’t feeling him like that.
Both of them turned smiling at me. “Nah, we’re good over here.”
Krishna and I never used protection and there was always a possibility, but I knew she secretly used birth control.
I found out about it by snooping through her phone. One night when I was visiting her I went looking and saw the Walgreens app with a notification. The notification was for her ready prescription and that prescription was her birth control. At first it made me angry that she would go behind my back but once I actually thought it through and put myself in her shoes, I relaxed knowing that she had enough sense to protect herself.
No, I never cheated on her but us bringing a child into the world right now wasn’t a smart idea.
“I can’t put my finger on it but something is about to happen. I feel it. That shit is keeping me up at night. Instead of being up under my woman I’m out here walking around making sure we straight. If you can, keep them all home. Coco crazy ass too.” I made sure they understood me before hugging them and going back to my house.
Each step I took my feet felt heavier and heavier. I had a million and one things on my mind and I needed to find out what was going on especially with JD. The threats with Miguel and how Mitch brushed them off unsettled me. I didn’t share that information with my brothers because I didn’t want them to worry. They needed to focus on their families while I did what I do best protect them.
My motto was keep everyone safe and love Krishna.
Chapter 14
Krishna
“I think I’m pregnant.” Noelani blurted right in the middle of us hanging up decorations in my new classroom.
Pausing midair with a wide grin on my face, I gazed over at her for clarity. “Uh, dude, anyone with eyes can see that you’re with child. Has Keatyn confirmed what we all know or you’re finally noticing the small basketball underneath your clothes?”
Bless her heart but Noelani had to know that going around and pretending that she wasn’t pregnant was comical to say the least. I knew the minute she gave Cassian an inch she’d end up pregnant. I told that damn girl that he’d try to get her pregnant on purpose.
“Hush, Krish.” She swatted me with her lip poked out. “Yes, I wanted another baby but not like this. Not when there’s this grey cloud hanging over everyone.”
I got chills thinking about the leer of what was going on. Amell thought I slept too hard to notice he barely closed his eyes at night. My parents had been living their best lives, which wasn’t unusual but what had me on edge was my father’s nonchalant attitude to everything. All of a sudden, he wanted me to come back home. Then he wanted to decrease everyone’s security. To top it off I knew him and Amell were at odds for unknown reasons. Then Noelani came back after being gone for six years as the head of her late husband’s cartel.
What in the hell was going on?
“Congratulations. I’m happy for you, and this baby will be the sunshine that everyone needs.” I thought hard for a second before revealing my own secret. “Maybe there will be two babies added to the bunch by the end of the year.” No one outside of my gyno in Cali knew that I stopped taking my birth control.
Almost every night I jump Amell making love to him like a runaway nun.
Hopping down off the stool, Noe walked over to where I stood taping up pictures. “We always talk about Cassian and me, spill all the juiciness with you and mysterious Amell.”
Ha, where did she want me to start?
This last month or so felt like I was in the middle of the best dream of my life. We lived together. We showered together. We woke up to each other. Life was really good, and I was teaching again. Instead of applying for an administrative job with the School Board of Broward County, I decided to teach biology again.