Lather, rinse, repeat.
It had looked for a while as though Warren had taken a turn for the worse, but he surprised us all. His round of chemo ended and he was looking and feeling better every day. He was still in the wheel chair for a portion of the day and tired easily, but he had color in his face and instead of the droopy weariness, he was gaining strength.
Jenny had gone MIA, so unless I was at work, Ame was with me. The child was going through major growing pains. She was never happy. She fussed and whined, and threw tantrums. She did say her one word, though. And only one—meewl.
“Meewl…Meewl…Meewl…” She said the same damn thing on repeat as though she was trying to tell me something. And maybe she was. I refused to listen.
I avoided Parker or anyone else who wanted to ask about Mel. I just kept my head down reminding myself repeatedly that I’d done the right thing, regardless of how miserable I felt without her.
The misery I was experiencing was nothing compared to how it would feel if I had to watch her slow descent toward death’s door. I told myself to give it time, but it had been over a week since she’d left, and I only felt worse. `
It didn’t help that my wolf was inconsolable. He was angry and sullen. Lately, I couldn’t even shift. When I tried, he fought, refusing to emerge.
It wasn’t a complete surprise when Heather called me over to her house one night. She and Warren were seated at the dining room table. Warren’s face was pulled taut, but his eyes were sharp.
He and Heather exchanged glances before my sister went on the attack. “What’s going on with you, Hamish? You’ve been singing the blues for over a week.”
I grunted. “Naw, that’s light jazz.”
“I’m serious. Something’s going on with you and I want you to spill. You need to tell me. I can’t handle worrying about you too right now.”
“I’m fine, Heather. You’ve got enough going on here.”
Heather glanced at the clock. Then she pointed back and forth from me to herself. “We’re not done here, but something’s going on with Jenny. I told her I’d call at four and I wanted you to be here.”
Heather held her cell to her ear, and when Jenny answered, she put the call on speaker and laid it on the table. “Hi, honey. You’re on speaker. We’re all here. Me, dad, and Uncle Mac.”
“Bonus then you can all get the news at once.” Jenny sounded defiant, almost argumentative.
Heather glanced at me, then she and Warren locked eyes. “We’re listening.”
“I’m getting married.”
A tension filled the room.
“Jenny, where are you right now?” My words came out sounding harsher than I’d intended.
Heather held up a hand to silence me. “That’s wonderful, honey. Who’s the lucky man?”
“I’m in Seattle. Joe and I are tying the knot, then we’re thinking of heading down into California for a time.”
Warren’s jaw was working. It was obvious it was taking extreme effort for him to remain calm. “Jenny, you’re not the only person affected by your decisions. Your choices affect your daughter too.”
“I know that! You act like I’m stupid. Like I have no idea what I’m doing.”
My patience was thin. “How can you just move Ame away from her grandparents and uncle who love her? Not to mention, we’re your support system. You’re really just going to up and whisk her away like that?”
“I’m not taking Ame.”
The table finally fell silent and I felt my stomach clench as Warren’s head drooped and his shoulders sagged.
Heather went to him and wrapped her arm around him. “Sweetheart, Ame is a wonderful child. You’ll come to love her as much as we all do. You just need to be around her more, get to know her better. Please come home for a while. Spend time with your daughter. I’m not implying you should end the engagement, only that there’s no rush.”
“Ame, Ame, Ame. I tell you I’m getting married and that’s all you can say. None of you give a shit about me!”
I rolled my eyes. “Jenny, we all care about you.”
“I don’t want to get to know her. I don’t want to be a mother. The only reason I had her was because you guys would’ve been disappointed if I’d had an abortion.”
Tears pooled in Heather’s eyes. Warren slumped in his wheelchair. I stepped back, feeling as though I’d been physically struck by Jenny’s words. “You can’t mean that.”
“I do. I really do. I won’t ever come back. Joe and I will make it on our own.”
I looked over at Ame who was in the living room sitting on a blanket spread out on the floor playing with her toys while the tense conversation went on around her. “Jenny—”
“What?! I don’t want a daughter! I should have gotten an abortion. I don’t want any of this. I just want to live my life. If you like her so much, you take her.”
“Jenny, you can’t just give your child away!” I focused on Heather and Warren. “Tell her she can’t just give her child away!”
“People do it all the time, Uncle Mac. There’s even a word for it. It’s called adoption.” Jenny huffed. “Someone will take her. She’s a cute kid.”
I growled.
A honk sounded through the phone in the background.
“Gotta go. Don’t call me, I’ll call you.” She giggled as though the whole thing was some big joke to her.
Stunned, I just stared at the phone wondering what the fuck had just happened. I glared at my sister. “How could you just let her get away with that?”
She looked up from Warren and broke into sobs. “I don’t know what else to do.”
Warren had tears streaming down his face.
I swore and moved over to them so I could rest a hand on both of them while Heather fell apart in Warren’s arms. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m just angry, Heather. You didn’t do anything wrong. That girl is just…ugh!”
Heather sniffled. “She’s just young and confused.”
I ground my teeth to keep my opinions of my niece to myself. “What about Ame?”
Heather pushed her shoulders back and lifted her chin. “She’s our granddaughter. We’ll take care of her.”
I stared at the two of them, both barely holding on as the stress and fear weighed them down. “No. I want to adopt her.”
“What?”
I cleared my throat and nodded. I could look confident, even if I was internally shitting my pants. “I’ll adopt her. I couldn’t love Amethyst more if she were my own daughter, and I’ve been taking care of her for months. I’ve loved her from the first day I saw her. She needs so much and you’re both already so overwhelmed. Please.”
Warren looked up at me and covered my hand with his own. “We appreciate everything you do for us, don’t think we haven’t noticed and aren’t grateful, but we won’t burden you with our grandkid, Mac. You have a life. From what I heard through the gossipvine, you have a mate that you’re being stupid about. You don’t need a kid.”
“You don’t understand. Ame is not a burden to me.” And I meant that. I didn’t realize how much I meant that until I heard the words from my own mouth. “Being a single dad isn’t perfect and won’t be easy. I’ll have to find a backup babysitter, but I’m already doing it. Unless you’re going to tell me that you can balance everything going on and little one who will be walking soon, I think you should consider letting me take her.”