He clasped the back of my neck. “You’re playing a dangerous game now. I think you forgot who owns who here. You don’t get to boss me around.”
He wound his other arm around my waist, pulling me to him, and my pulse spiraled faster. I fisted my hands against his chest. As much as I pretended to seem unfazed by his nearness and actions, I was on edge. My eyes widened when I felt something hard press against my stomach.
He smirked, noticing my reaction to his erection. “Surprised? Don’t think you’re anything special.” He ground against me, and I didn’t know if I hated more that he did it or that I didn’t dislike it. I’m a contemptible person. “It’s just a natural reaction.”
He was making out with those girls just a few minutes ago. “This only proves you’re a manwhore.”
“And you’re a hypocrite. You’re actually enjoying this.”
His smirk was too punishing, and I realized he could see right through me. The longer I stayed here, the more dangerous of a game we played, and I didn’t like not knowing the rules of the game. It was sick and twisted, and I willed myself to remember all the terrible things he’d done to me.
“Let me go.”
I hated him for being able to make me forget everything, for making me lost in the present moment and in these confusing, overwhelming feelings. What was happening to me? I hated him. I wanted to be far away from him, yet here I was, not even trying to move away. I’m so contemptible .
“Hayden, let me go!”
“I won’t until you say you’ll leave the party. Did you already forget you aren’t allowed to go to parties?”
“Enough. Just stop. You can’t control my life and treat me like this. I have friends now. Friends who want me here.”
Anger clouded his features, his grip on me increasing. “You became unpredictable these last few weeks, talking back and defying me, but I’m done playing around.” His hand traveled down my back and to my bottom, squeezing it. “How about I take you right here and now?”
Oh God, he was crazy. He couldn’t be thinking that seriously!
I didn’t know this Hayden. Hayden never threatened me with sex, yet these last several days he crossed that line and made me feel things I couldn’t even name.
I was in no way ready to deal with what was happening right now, and no amount of alcohol could give me enough courage for this.
Terrified that he could finally snap and break that boundary here, of all places—both figuratively and literally—I grabbed an air freshener spray from the sink next to me and sprayed it onto his face.
He jerked away from me and covered his eyes, hissing. “Bitch!”
I pushed him off me, not wasting time. I opened the door and dashed out of the bathroom, reaching the safety of the crowd in the other part of the house. Only then I allowed myself to stop.
What have I done?! Am I crazy?!
The bubbles of hysteria climbed up my throat, and I started laughing, unable to contain myself. I fought him back too! That felt so good.
I just hoped Hayden wouldn’t get that air freshener out of his eyes any time soon.
Chapter 25
I INTENDED TO LISTEN to Hayden and leave the party. All the excitement and pleasure of this evening had evaporated into thin air, and as long as he was here, I couldn’t relax even for a second.
I was afraid Blake and Masen would harass Jessica, and I hoped she’d managed to avoid them somehow. It would be best if she and I left immediately.
I searched for Melissa and Jessica around the house, determined to find them, but had no success. I went to the backyard as my last stop, but they weren’t there. I halted next to a large pool illuminated by floor lights, enjoying the fresh air after being confined in a small space infused with Hayden’s intoxicating scent. I gazed at the clear, star-spangled sky, wondering what was going on between Hayden and me.
How did it turn into the nearness, touches, smell, and the quickened heartbeat that blurred everything that happened before? What was it in his eyes that screamed his deepest thoughts at me? I saw inexplicable passion in his gaze that opposed everything we’d gone through so far, and I didn’t know what to make of it. He hated me. He even tried to kill me. Still, his proximity and the way he kissed me confused me...
No, I was overthinking now. Hayden might be unpredictable and able to turn from fire into ice in a matter of seconds, but there was no doubt that he didn’t feel anything for me.
He would make me pay the next time he saw me. I was certain of it.
I spun around, determined to leave right this second, but then I noticed Jessica and Melissa running in my direction.
“Hey, girl,” Melissa said loudly. “We’ve been searching for you everywhere. Steven’s pal just grabbed you and took you away... Are you okay?”
I nodded and glanced at Jessica. “And you? Are you okay? Did Blake and Masen see you?”
“Yes, but luckily, Melissa intervened before Blake could do anything.”
“Seriously, those guys need a mental check up. They’re like rabid dogs,” Melissa said. “What do they have against you anyway?”
I didn’t have a chance to answer her, because Mateo appeared in my line of sight, and my heart dropped. Oh no, Mateo.
I completely forgot about him.
I checked him out, noticing how attractive he looked in those dark jeans that hung low on his hips and a green button-down shirt. He spotted me and grinned, striding to us.
This wasn’t fair. This wasn’t how this night was supposed to be. I was supposed to be free to enjoy my time with Mateo and see if there could have been something more between us. Instead, I hoped to leave this party as soon as possible, ditching Mateo in the process, so I could run away from Hayden.
“I was looking for you,” he said and halted in front of me. He didn’t take his eyes off of me even once. He surprised me when he leaned in and left a lingering kiss on my cheek, his rather unpleasant cologne enveloping me, and I scrunched up my nose a bit.
I couldn’t even be excited about this anymore. I couldn’t enjoy my time with him, because my mind kept coming back to Hayden in that bathroom, who was probably planning my demise at the moment.
I took a slight step back. “Mateo, I...” I felt even worse because he was smiling so softly at me.
“Girls,” he finally acknowledged Jessica and Melissa, nodding at them. I introduced Jessica, catching on the way Melissa was smiling at me. She looked like she was plotting something.
“I think Jessica and I should go get another drink,” she said, clearly bent on giving Mateo and me some space. I wanted to stop her and say that wouldn’t be necessary, but Jessica agreed all too quickly with her.
“But what about them?” I asked Jessica, referring to Blake, Hayden, and Masen. I was worried about her safety.
“Don’t you worry about a thing,” Melissa replied instead of her. “Everything will be fine. You two kids should enjoy now.” I watched her take Jessica by the arm and scurry away with her, avoiding Mateo’s gaze in embarrassment.
He cleared his throat, and I met his stare reluctantly. He was amused.
I giggled, all nervous. What now?
He grew serious. “There is something I need to tell you.”
“Yes?”