“Really?”
“Yeah. She conceded.”
I stopped walking for a moment. “Okay, so what does this mean?”
“It means I’d love to bring them along with me on one of our future visits, if you’re open to that.”
As uncomfortable as it made me, I didn’t want Sunny to go through what I had, never knowing my half-siblings. I did fear for her future if anything were to happen to me. While I had every hope that Sunny would go on to live a normal life, what if she needed more support than the average person? The idea that she might have siblings to look after her if I wasn’t around was quite comforting.
“That would be okay,” I finally answered. “Are you sure they’re ready?”
“They’ve gotten used to the idea of her. I think they need to meet her for it to feel real to them. They’re sweet, accepting kids, and I suspect it’s going to go better than I ever imagined.”
“Then I’m good with it. I don’t want to keep Sunny from her siblings.”
Charles let out a breath. “Thank you. I’d kiss you if I could right now.”
I held my palm out. “Don’t even think about it.”
“A man can dream.” He winked. “But one step at a time.”
Charles was crazy if he thought I’d ever take him back. More than the obstacle of forgiving him, I now knew I’d never really loved him. My feelings for Deacon were on an entirely different level. Regardless of how he’d ended things, what I felt for Deacon and the experience of falling in love with him couldn’t be erased. Even if I wished it could.
CHAPTER 24
Deacon
COCKBLOCKER
“What are you looking at?” she asked.
Shit. How long had I been staring at her? I hadn’t meant to make her uncomfortable. It was just… I couldn’t take my eyes off her. I’d done a pretty decent job of keeping Carys out of my mind this week. Then I got to the checkout line at the supermarket where I’d been picking up groceries for my grandmother. The cashier looked like an older version of Sunny. Did she think I was staring at her because she had Down syndrome? Shit. That wasn’t it at all.
“I’m sorry. I know I was staring at you. It’s because you remind me of someone who’s special to me, someone I don’t get to see anymore. I didn’t mean to be rude.”
She rolled her eyes, and it made me chuckle, because I could see Sunny growing up to be as feisty as this girl. My chest tightened at the thought that I might never see Carys or Sunny again.
It had been three months since I’d left New York, and my life there seemed an eternity away. I still didn’t know how to handle my abandoned apartment. I’d been paying my rent, which I was able to do since I was living rent-free at my grandmother’s house. Gram appreciated the company and the help, and I appreciated the fact that I could be home in Minnesota without having to shack up with my parents. I didn’t know how long I planned to stay here, but returning to New York wasn’t an option yet.
The cashier handed me my receipt. The name on her tag read Autumn.
I nodded and smiled. “Have a good day, Autumn.”
She mouthed, “Fuck off.”
Nice.
I couldn’t help smiling again. The universe was messing with me today.
* * *
One thing about living with Gram was that she could always see right through me and didn’t put up with any shit. I’d refused to tell her why I’d come home to Minnesota. I’d yet to talk about the real reason with anyone in my family at all. But while the rest of them weren’t prying, Gram had been insistent on getting it out of me at some point.
As I put away her groceries that afternoon, she watched me from her chair in the adjacent living room.
“I’m not as dumb as you think, you know.”
My hand paused on a box of cereal I’d just put in the cupboard. “What are you getting at, Gram?”
“I know this has something to do with a woman. What else could it be?”
I resumed putting stuff away to distract from the tension I felt. “Why do you assume that?”
“Because why else would you leave the most exciting city in the world to come live with me? A broken heart is the only thing that could make someone run away and come back to the place they’ve been avoiding for years.”
She was right about that. I’d avoided Minnesota like it was my job.
I sighed. “You’re right. It does have to do with a woman. But it’s not what you’re probably thinking. I was the one who broke her heart, not vice versa. But I’m not ready to get into it.”
My grandmother’s brows drew together. “Do you plan to stay here indefinitely?”
“No.” I paused. “At least I don’t think so.” Pointing a can of Pringles at her, I said, “Why? Are you in a rush for me to leave? I thought you liked having me here.”
“While at times I like having my grown-ass grandson here, your gram needs her space once in a while.”
“For what?”
She looked at me like I should have known, but it didn’t compute.
“I have a friend I haven’t been able to have over since you got here.”
Virtually scratching my head, I still didn’t get it. Until I did.
Oh.
Oh
Well I’ll be fucking damned.
“I’m messing up your game, Gram?”
Jeez. And I’d wondered where I got it from all these years.
“I’m not saying you can’t stay here. But you might want to share the love with your brother one or two nights a week.”
“Here I was thinking I was helping out my sweet little granny, keeping her company, doing her shopping. Now I come to find out I’m just a cockblocker.” I shook my head. “Well, thanks for enlightening me.”
* * *
Once I got a clue that I was intruding on my grandmother’s booty calls, I hit up my brother for an alternate place to stay a few days a week.
Whereas my parents and grandmother lived in the suburbs, Alex lived in downtown Minneapolis. With my backpack hooked over my shoulder, I arrived at his building. Looking up at the high-rise, I felt a pang of longing for city life.
Well, it was less about the city and more about what I’d left behind there.
After taking the elevator up, I knocked on my brother’s door.
He opened. “Hey, dude.”
“Hey.”
We shared a manly hug, patting each other on the back. Dropping my bag, I looked around. The furniture looked new. The place smelled great. My little bro had come a long way from the way I remembered him when I left home for California back in college. He was just under me in height, but had really grown to resemble me more with age.
“I’ve barely seen you since you’ve been home,” he said. “I’m glad Gram kicked you to the curb.”
“So what’s the plan tonight?” I asked.
“Lindsay’s coming by after work and we’re all gonna go to dinner.”
“Sounds good. I can’t believe I’ve been here for three months and haven’t met your girlfriend yet.”