“I think it involves more than just an employee taking from the till or stealing merchandise.”
I nodded. “I agree. More than one person too, don’t you think?”
“Probably, but let’s see what the tape brings up. We should also try to find out what the cops are thinking.”
I poured myself a cup of coffee. “I don’t think he liked hearing the police might suspect him.”
Cyrus shrugged as he pulled a donut from the box that he brought in. “No, who would? But it’s not likely that they’re doing nothing, so if they’re not talking to him, there must be a reason.”
“Maybe we should do our jobs and not just go on conjecture.”
“Right.”
I started out of my office.
“Did you ever find April?” he asked.
I stopped in the doorway, taking a breath to hide my emotions before turning to him. “Nope. Why?”
“I suspect she’s the real reason you’re not sleeping.”
“I don’t remember a course in psychoanalysis in SEAL training.”
He laughed. “It doesn’t take a shrink to see that she’s still in your system. What are you going to do about it?”
I shrugged. “There’s nothing I can do. She dumped me, remember?” I walked out before he could respond. I went into my office, shutting the door. A few nights ago, I was feeling like maybe April and I could have a second chance. Or at least spend some time together to see if we still had something, and if not, be able to close that chapter of my life. Today, my feelings were much different. If I stayed away from her, I’d still have my memories of that summer. Seeing her now, having her tell me she wasn’t interested in me, would taint all the good memories I had. Yes, I had a letter from her saying she was done with me, but even that had a level of distance in which I could pretend it didn’t happen and I could focus on the good.
I scraped my hands over my face, realizing what a pussy I was being. I needed to stop letting April torment me like this. The best way to end it, would be to completely forget it. To cut myself off from it. That meant, not thinking of her and certainly not trying to find her. It was time for me to make my own place in Bismarck.
I started my computer and began a search to find a permanent place to live. A bachelor pad, maybe.
6
April
I was a smart educated woman, but my job was mostly a glorified secretary, because again, August seemed unable to see me as more than a pregnant high school student. Or maybe it was because this God-awful software he has us using now was so lame, that it made me look inept.
Tired of fighting with it, I rose from my desk and strode down to August’s office. I knocked and popped my head in.
“What do you need, April, I’m really busy?” August didn’t bother to look up at me and instead kept his gaze on his computer.
“Well, gee Auggie, the rest of us are having a party out here.” I glared at him. “Do you know how insulting you are when you talk like that?”
He sighed in that way that said he was pissed that we were going to have it out again.
Deciding to get right to it, I said, “That software is shit. We need to change to another one.”
“We don’t have the time or money—”
“It’s wasting time and money. I’ve done the research and found one that’s much better, offers better support, and while it costs more, it would more than pay for itself when all of us are more productive because we’re not dealing with lags and other defects of the current program.”
He sat back in his chair, steepling his fingers. “There are a lot of tradeoffs as a business owner.”
I rolled my eyes that he was going to go over that same song and dance. I knew it verbatim now.
“You might not understand how it works—”
“I do understand the software as I’m the one who has to battle with it every day. And I understand this business. Better than you and anyone else because I’m the only one who has to manage information and data from every single department. Now I’ve done the math and if you’d deign to come off your high horse and take the meeting that I scheduled with you twice, you’d see my research yourself.”
His jaw clenched. “The manager of your department hasn’t come to me with any problems—”
“He’s playing golf! He doesn’t give a crap about this.” I decided to leave out the fact that I could manage the department better. And in fact, as the daughter of the founder, and August’s sister, I should have a bigger role here. Not from nepotism, but because I was competent and earned the right to have my place. “Are you sexist or is it just me that you don’t respect?”
“April, I don’t have time for one of your tantrums—"
“Fuck you, Auggie.” My temper whipped out, surprising even me. “I’m sick and tired of you dismissing me and everything I try to contribute to make this firm run better. You do the same thing at home, and I’m done with it. I get that I was an immature, inexperienced, naïve kid when mom and dad died and you had to help me. But now I’m educated, experienced, smart, and certainly more committed to this firm than that dickwad manager Lowell. But listen, if you can’t value me and my input, I’ll find some place that will.”
He rolled his eyes telling me he thought I was being histrionic. “You’re overreacting. Take the day off and—”
“I quit.” I didn’t even wait for his response. I walked back to my desk and packed my things. The fact that he didn’t follow me or try to stop me meant he didn’t care or didn’t believe me. Probably both. He’d see this as more proof that I was immature and needed his guidance.
Fueled by my anger, I carried my things out to my car, tossing them in the back. I got in and drove, not knowing where I’d go. Thank goodness Maya was at camp all day because the realization of what I’d just done hit me and I’d need some time to deal with it. I’d just stood up to my brother and quit my job. It felt so good, and yet also terrifying.
I started past a park and decided to stop to gather my wits about me. My heart was beating a million miles a minute.
“This is it, April,” I told myself. “Phase one of Get My Own Life.” Now that I was out from under August at work, I had to get out from under him at home. That meant moving.
I took out my phone and did a search on available apartments. Not having a job would make moving out hard, but I did have my little nest egg just for this purpose. Plus, I did have my share of the trust, although I’d need to fight August over accessing it.
I realized I’d walked out on August telling him I was competent and could take care of myself, so I’d try to make my own way without the trust. I’d get a new job, find a new place, and Maya and I would finally be free to live our own lives.
I remembered the apartments I’d mentioned to August the other day, so I drove over to them. Now was the time to implement phase two of getting my own life. I parked in the parking lot and walked into the leasing office.
“Hi, welcome to Riverside Apartments.” The thirtyish woman behind the desk smiled and stood. “How can I help you?”