After Hayden’s fight, Carmen didn’t want to be separated from him. She tried her hardest to help him in any way she could, especially when he was discharged from the hospital and had to spend several days in bed.
It was difficult to explain to Carmen why her son had suffered life-threatening injuries without mentioning T and his gang, but I did my best to make her believe Hayden had gotten into yet another street fight. She was furious and threatened to sue Hayden’s attackers, and only after Hayden swore to her that he wouldn’t end up in such a mess again, she decided to let it slide for the last time. Barely.
Hayden still wasn’t okay with everything that had happened between them, but he was starting to accept her, which could, hopefully, help rebuild their trust in the future.
Carmen had definitely changed. She’d abandoned the woman who was deep in her work as a way to escape reality and showed more affection to Hayden than ever before. She wasn’t chained to the hospital anymore, and she was slowly getting used to life free of ceaseless work.
Hayden and I had also changed. The crushing pain I experienced the moment I thought I lost him brought me reinforced strength to deal with anything that could come our way. I met every low with more determination and patience than before, resolved not to let our darkness or insecurities undermine all the progress we’d made so far. Hayden was allowing me to be there for him whenever he got pulled into his dark world, and we’d started couples counseling. It helped us open up more to each other and learn how to deal with our arguments and misunderstandings in a healthier way.
I also started cognitive-behavioral therapy to treat social anxiety, accepting Ms. Kishimoto’s suggestion to let one of her colleagues work with me. I was making small steps because I had yet to get over feeling exposed and vulnerable whenever I shared my thoughts. I needed to get rid of the urge to build a shield around me. But even so, being able to talk about my issues was comforting. It pushed me closer to a life in which I wouldn’t be controlled by my anxiety or fear of socializing with others and letting them closer to me.
“Come here,” Hayden told me when we entered his house and he put the box with my books down. I lowered my box next to his and allowed him to pull me against him.
“I’m okay,” I told him as I buried my head into his shoulder. His pine tree scent engulfed me, and I breathed it in. “I knew something like that would happen.”
He threaded his hands through my hair. “You’re worth a lot, Sarah. Just remember that I’m always here for you.” His soft lips brushed across my cheek. “You’re not alone. You have me.”
I nodded and squeezed his jacket as my lips got closer to his neck. “I know. And you have me.” I planted a kiss below his jaw. “I love you.”
“I love you too. I love you the most.”
We found Carmen in the kitchen slicing pieces of the chocolate cake she’d made for me. “There you are,” she said with a dazzling smile. My heart pumped with joy because she was doing this for me.
She’d made me a birthday cake and even bought me a present—a white gold jewelry set with a necklace, earrings, and a bracelet. I didn’t want to accept it, shocked that she would buy something so expensive for someone who wasn’t even her daughter, but she didn’t want to hear it.
There were no words to express how this woman made me feel. I’d gained a person who truly cared for me even though we weren’t connected by blood.
“Let’s eat cake together,” she said.
Unlike before, Hayden didn’t protest. He wasn’t quite himself, but he also wasn’t angry with her, eating his cake and responding in normal tone of voice whenever she asked him something.
I observed them silently, feeling the urge to grin. They were my family now. Somehow, we found our way to each other and this moment filled with peace, love, and a promise of better days.
Hayden met my stare. “What?”
I smiled and took another bite of the delicious cake. “I’m just happy. Sitting here like this feels amazing.”
He lowered his fork and ran his hand across my cheek, gazing at me warmly. “We’ll have many more moments like this.”
Carmen’s eyes twinkled with affection. “I’m so happy for you two. There is nothing I want more than to see you both smiling and happy.”
My heart skipped a beat at her words. Family. I was becoming emotional too quickly.
“Thank you for accepting me, Carmen. You’ve done a lot for me, and I can’t ever repay you.”
“There is no need to repay me.” She covered Hayden’s hand, to which his body went rigid, but he didn’t move away. She offered him a calming smile. “You brought joy back to this house. You helped my son, and you brought a smile back to our faces. We’re truly lucky to have you.”
She placed her hand on mine across the table and held both Hayden and me. The way she looked at me—so tenderly—brought happy tears to my eyes.
“Happy birthday, sweetie,” she said. “May all your dreams come true.”
My vision blurred, and I sniffed, closing my eyes. My dreams were already coming true. Just half a year ago I couldn’t even imagine I would be this happy surrounded by people who showered me with love, but here I was. And it was just the beginning.
“Okay. Enough with this sentimental crap,” Hayden growled and thrust his fork forcefully into his cake. “You’re going to drown us with your giant tears.”
I shook my head at him. A wavering smile settled on my face. “I love you too,” I replied jokingly and leaned in to kiss his cheek, memorizing this wonderful day for good.
Today was, for sure, my best birthday ever.
Chapter 23
“HE BOUGHT YOU THE LATEST iPhone?” Mel asked me incredulously, trying hard to be heard over the live music that blared through the house.
A local rock band, Hawks and Roses, was currently playing a cover of “Radioactive” by Imagine Dragons, which had the teenagers in the living room in a frenzy. They were old friends of Hayden’s, who were making a name for themselves doing local gigs and posting their original songs and covers on YouTube, and they came to play tonight for Hayden’s and my birthday party.
Since Hayden didn’t celebrate his birthday more than two weeks ago because he was still recovering from his injuries, we’d decided to celebrate it together. Carmen had gone to spend the night at her friend’s house, but not before she made us promise we wouldn’t trash the house.
I was uncomfortable about this whole birthday party notion at first, since I’d never thrown one, let alone with people who had bullied me. However, everyone had been nice to me so far, and I didn’t know what to make of it.
“He said it was not only my birthday gift but also a gift for getting into Yale.”
“What did you say?”
I sighed. “I said I’d go back to working as his cleaner if I had to accept such an expensive gift.”
Mel chuckled and took a swig from her cup. “I bet his reaction was priceless.”
“Not really. He just reminded me that my old LG was on the verge of dying a painful death because of all the damage it had suffered, mostly because of him.” I hadn’t been able to say anything to that. After all, he was responsible for damaging my phone. “So now he wants to compensate with a new phone.”