Beth tensed at the energies surrounding her, and then her muscles relaxed and she started to breathe more evenly.
The fire flared in the grate. Jonan caught the scent of white sage and wondered briefly whether Doriel had thrown some into the fire. He smiled at her nod and closed his eyes again.
He felt huge as he stood there, towering over Beth, expanding beyond the confines of his own human form. He saw it and felt nothing but love for the vessel that carried him in this lifetime. He had spent so many lives with this woman. They had endured so much pain and fear together and now it hovered around them, polluting the atmosphere and poisoning their own bodies against the spirits that longed to grow.
Some of that fear is mine. Jonan sent the thought into Doriel’s mind.
And that you can clear, she sent back. Jonan looked at Beth in his mind’s eye. She was small, contracted and surrounded with dark energy. She was shaking, vibrating at such a slow speed that he wondered how she was managing to keep going.
He saw the golden cord that bound them, stretching from his heart to hers. It was bright, but surrounded by murk and he focused on clearing away all that was his, or that did not belong to Beth. As the darkness cleared, her shaking reduced. She expanded a little and looked ever so slightly brighter.
Sensing that more beings had joined, Jonan opened his eyes. Everywhere he looked he saw a version of Beth as she had been in another lifetime. The Beths were everywhere, their cords glowing gold, or muted to a dull darkness.
Jonan allowed his heart chakra to open even wider, seeing pure, pink energy flowing out into the room to every version of Beth. Please help me, he called out to them with his mind and felt, rather than heard, their murmur of assent.
The beings created a circle around Jonan and Beth.
Please let me disconnect from my pain so I can help Beth, Jonan called. In response he saw a flicker of images, his own soul through lifetime after lifetime. He saw so many pictures that his heart ached. He saw his own pain reflected back at him over and over, through countless rejections. He focused on love and imagined the fear formed into a thick, grey cord. In his mind’s eye, he raised a flaming sword and brought it down on the cord with such force that he shuddered and stepped backwards as it severed. Jonan imagined lighting each end of the cord and watching it burn up until it fizzled out.
You have done well, the beings thought into his mind. One of his guides stepped forwards and started drawing out the energy. Feeling the tension subside he released the breath he had been holding.
When Jonan opened his eyes, Beth was looking at him. Her eyes were bright, her lips parted as her gaze roamed his face and body. ‘What happened?’ she whispered.
‘I released some of my fear. Would you like me to do the same for you?’
Beth
JONAN LOOKED LIKE an angel. He was glowing, his energy so bright and clear Beth had to resist the compulsion to shade her eyes. He was all she could look at in the little room. He felt like home. She felt his energy surround her, warming away the cold numbness and, for a moment, she felt almost like herself again.
‘Would you like me to do this for you?’ Jonan asked.
She stared at him, wondering how he could make her shine like that.
Then Jonan stepped backwards and her world darkened. Without his energy around her, she fell back into the pit Amelia had put her in, only this time it was worse. This time she saw exactly what that poisonous woman had done. The moment of relief illuminated how badly things had gone wrong.
She clutched at her throat. Her airways constricted. Her heart was ready to burst from the fear that pumped through her system.
She nodded.
Jonan stepped closer. As his energy surrounded her again she gasped, drawing in air like a drowning woman. She sank into the sensations, allowing her eyes to close. She felt Jonan standing in front of her, his energy so familiar, so bright next to her own, which she now saw was dulled beyond recognition. She felt waves of light wash over her, and then something began to build. She opened her eyes.
Jonan and Doriel stood on either side of her, arms spread wide. Even with her normal sight, she could see their auras glowing with pure white light. She stared, transfixed, as the energy flickered around them, surging towards her, drawing out the heaviness that swamped her soul. She saw herself from the outside, reliving the events of the last few days. As she watched, the pictures floated away, each layer leaving her mind a little clearer.
Jonan and Doriel lowered their hands. Slowly, silently, they stepped out of their positions. Jonan sat next to Beth on the sofa. He leaned back, letting his head sink into the soft cushions, closing his eyes. His body was so close, but it didn’t touch her own at all. With the fog lifted, she longed to shift a little closer, but he surely wouldn’t want that after the things she had said.
Beth focused on her body, looking for differences, but everything felt normal, just as it should be. Her heart rate was calm. Her mind was clear. She felt none of the panic that had driven her over the past few days. All she felt was embarrassment.
‘What the hell was that?’ Beth said.
‘We cleared away Amelia’s interference,’ Jonan said. He sat up, pushing his hair out of his eyes. Turning his body towards her, he reached out, brushing her fingers with his own, sending tingles along her skin.
Beth froze.
Jonan moved backwards, giving her the space, she no longer wanted.
She swallowed. ‘I really appreciate what you did. I meant, what did Amelia do to me? I don’t even recognise the woman I became. She had me shivering and shaking at the idea of upsetting her, being near anybody, even coming in here, for goodness sakes.’
‘Amelia doesn’t like us.’ Doriel sat in the armchair opposite and pulled her legs up, crossing them on the seat. ‘We work in opposite directions. She doesn’t want you anywhere near us, so she focused your fears to keep you away.’
‘She was manipulating me.’
‘She was.’ Jonan leaned back. Now the glow had subsided she saw the dark circles under his eyes. ‘But she can only manipulate the energy you already have. The best way to protect yourself is to get rid of the baggage you’re hiding.’
‘What do you mean?’ Beth drew back. Jumping up, she started pacing as the fizzing began again in her stomach.
‘Sit down,’ Doriel said, nodding towards the sofa. ‘You’re getting drawn back in. We’ve cleared Amelia’s energy, but she’s triggered your own patterns and now they’ve come out to play. We need to deal with them, or you’ll spiral back down.’
‘You make that sound so easy,’ Beth said, forcing herself to sit back down.
‘That’s what I’m here for,’ Jonan said, his voice smooth and hypnotic. His eyes were purple in the dim light of the living room and the blue points on the tips of his ears burned more brightly than ever.
‘I promised to help you. I have been waiting for this moment my whole life, but I need you to stop pushing me away.’
‘I think that’s my cue to leave.’ Doriel winked as she uncurled from the chair. ‘I’ll be in the shop if you need me. You never know, the customers we kicked out might even come back if I’m really lucky.’
There was silence when the door shut behind Doriel.
Jonan sat back in the chair, looking at Beth. There was tension in his jaw and his arms were crossed over his chest.