“So far. The color is great. I like having something to play with up here. But the more important thing is, do you?”
“I don’t think about it much.” He reached up, smiling as the soft mini curls tickled his fingers.
“My adventurous ginger.” Saul leaned close to his ear. “Finish that roll and I’ll take you to bed. Our bed. And I’ll climb in with you.”
“Our bed.” God, he ached for that. “I’ll eat it.”
“Good boy.” Saul waited patiently while he forced it down, and then slid the pain pill over to him. “Lots of water.”
He nodded. He wished he didn’t need it, but he did. Bad. He took it and drank deep, the water cold and necessary.
Then he forced himself up to standing and took the bowls to the sink to rinse them.
Saul hovered but didn’t stop him, staying close while putting away the leftovers. They moved around in the kitchen so easily together anyone would’ve thought they’d done it forever.
By the time he was done, the pill was starting to make the world fuzzy around the edges.
“I think, I, uh…” He blinked, staring down at his hands. What had he been doing?
“We were… going upstairs.” Saul handed him a towel. “Dry your hands, baby. We better get moving before your knees go to Jell-O.”
Saul let him dry his hands, then hooked an arm around his back to support him. “Ready?”
“Uh-huh. Longest damn staircase on earth. Should’ve bought a ranch style. Swear to God.” Words kept falling out of his mouth.
“One foot in front of the other. This is easy shit. You can do this.” They made it up one step, and then another, and then he lost count. “That’s it. Just keep moving. I’ve got you.”
“I want to do a scene with you one day. Have you ever given anyone your collar? Arnie would have laughed at me for even going there, daring to ask. Seriously. I have to wonder how he and Carter ever became friends. He’s so formal, and Arnie just expected me to toe the line because… I guess because the first time he pushed down I sucked him off… weird, huh?”
“Two more steps, okay? That’s it. One… and two. Good job.” Saul wasn’t answering his questions. He had asked them out loud, right? “I’m going to help you get undressed. Do you need the bathroom?”
“I’d better I guess. I want a shower. Not now. Tomorrow. God, I’m glad we’re home. I finally get to be naked with you.” He sucked in his gut, blinking as his sweats fell off. “Oops.”
Saul laughed. “Saves me a step, skinny. God, you need to eat more.” Saul got him untangled from the sweats and helped him to the bathroom. “You’re getting woozy, I’m coming in. Falling in here would be bad.”
“Uh-huh. I’ve fallen a lot in my time.” The doctors had asked a ton of questions, all answered with ‘rodeo’. He did his business, chatting away like his common sense had been derailed. “It’s fixin’ to get chilly, I think. Not cold, not yet, but too bad to camp. I’d freeze my balls off.”
“We still have a couple of weeks before it’s just not fun anymore. I’d like to go, I think it might be good for you.” Saul followed him to the sink. “Hands. Then teeth.”
“Teeth. No marks.” How many times had he heard that? Watch your teeth, boy. No marks. None. Hundreds.
He brushed his teeth, the world swinging dangerously from present to past, hiccupping around. Arnie. Saul. Geoff. Saul. Carter. Saul. Saul.
Saul placed a cup of water in his fingers so he could rinse and then he was moving again, this time toward the bed. It seemed so big after a week in that narrow torture chamber.
“Climb in, I’m coming.” Saul undressed quickly, adding his clothing to the pile in the center of the floor. “What do we do with this monitor? It just… stays like that?”
“Uh-huh. Just leave it on my chest.” The thing was a little like an alien pod, stuck on his pec. “Turning into a robot. Beep boop beep.” God, he was funny.
“Yea, okay. Come here, Data.” Saul chuckled and dragged him in, the sudden touch of hot skin against him sobering him just enough to see the way Saul was staring at him. So much worry.
“Home.” He reached for Saul, stroked his cheek, trying his dead level best to comfort his lover. “God, we’re home.”
“We are. Sounds good right? Home? Love you, baby. Close your eyes, you need to rest. I’m right here.” Saul was everywhere, heart beating against his temple, arms around him, legs tangled up with his.
“I love you, Master. You make it better. Make the weirdness tolerable.”
“You make everything better, Troy. Confusing sometimes but better. We’ve got this.” Saul kissed his forehead. “Sleep, boy.”
“Yes, Sir.”
Sleep. In his own bed.
Yes.
29
Saul spent an hour trying to fall asleep and another just allowing himself to hold Troy and be happy with that before getting restless. He wasn’t tired, not enough to sleep, and his mind was going a million miles an hour.
Troy had thrown him talking about Arnie and Carter, asking about his collar, and getting a good look at that heart monitor hadn’t helped anything. Neither had the really scary way those sweatpants just slipped off his boy’s hips. He had work to do.
God, so much work.
He managed to sit up and then slowly extract himself from Troy who barely even moved. His lover was out hard. He needed his phone so he could text Geoff like he’d promised, and he wanted a cup of coffee. He pulled on his jeans and dragged his phone out of the pocket.
We’re home, Troy’s sleeping. Chicken soup was good. I’m sure he’d love to see you tomorrow. When he didn’t get an immediate response he added, he’s okay. Heart monitor looks a little scary to me, but I’m a newbie with this shit.
Okay, coffee.
He tucked Troy in and jogged down the stairs. Maybe he didn’t need coffee. Maybe he needed some green. He felt wound up, thoughts spinning like a top.
Have you covered for work. Have suppers covered for 3 weeks. What else can I do? Geoff texted. So kind.
What else could Geoff do? Saul wanted to know about Arnie. He wanted to know everything.
And he wanted a joint.
He didn’t text any of that, though.
I’m good. You okay? Carter said you weren’t sleeping. Can I help?
Could he help? He couldn’t fucking help himself.
You want company? Carter’s sleeping and I’m going a little crazy.
Oh good. Yes. Company is what he needed. Come on over. Troy’s out cold. We have beer. You have any green?
Are you kidding? I’ll be there in 15. I’ll let C know.
Was it mean to hope that his boy stayed asleep long enough for him to enjoy this?
He ran back upstairs for a hoodie, it was getting cooler, and as much as he’d have liked to hang outside just in his jeans, he’d freeze his ass off. Troy hadn’t even moved. Didn’t look like his boy had so much as twitched since he’d left the room.
He and Geoff hadn’t spent a lot of time together really, but they had Troy in common, in a big way, and he figured they were better off as friends.