I’d had time to do a lot of soul searching since Tuesday’s epically awful confrontation. The night Cooper told me whatever we were was over. I refused to even call it a breakup because Cooper and I had barely even begun to date, so how could we break up?
No, I’d had time to think and to get my head on straight, and for the first time in what felt like forever—I wasn’t confused when it came to Cooper Jenkins. I was mad.
Olivia sighed as she gave me a sympathetic smile. “I wish I could stay,” she said softly. I shrugged and endured her sad smile a few moments longer before she nodded and waved us off, like a fretful mother sending her kindergartener off to school for the first time.
I gave her my best reassuring smile before the door closed behind us. Collette’s arm around my shoulders was starting to get painful. “If you need anything, you just say the word.”
I smiled but it felt strained. I loved my friends and I appreciated their support, but right about now I was stinkin’ tired of being protected and coddled. If one more person tried to tell me that they were looking out for me, I might scream.
That was Cooper’s MO and anytime someone offered it to me, it only reminded me of the fact that he was gone and I was alone.
Protector my butt.
But even with Cooper gone, I still had the biggest protector of all, hovering over my head. I hadn’t talked to Trenton yet, but he’d been blowing up my phone with texts, some angry, some filled with questions, and some that were the text version of a dad lecture.
All of them were infuriating. But I’d deal with Trenton, when I was ready. Honestly, right about now, not replying was probably the best form of torture.
And besides, while I was annoyed with Trenton for being a heavy handed, overprotective, pain-in-the-butt older brother, he wasn’t the one who’d broken us up.
He wasn’t the one who ended things.
That was all Cooper.
“Collette,” I said, with as much patience as I could muster. “I promise. I’ll be fine.”
She took a step back, dropped her arm from my shoulders, and eyed me with open curiosity.
I couldn’t blame her for doubting my word. She’d seen my meltdown first hand after Cooper had broken my heart in one foul swoop. She and my other friends from the academy had let me cry on their shoulders and helped pick up all my broken pieces when I completely fell apart.
I drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly.
But no more. I was officially done playing the victim here. I was through letting Cooper dictate my emotional state.
I was sick to death of wasting tears over Cooper Jenkins.
On cue, he entered the studio right as I thought his name. All my resolve to remain calm and collected flew out the window as my entire body went numb. I wanted to scream and cry at the same time. But knowing that would only instigate more hugs from Collette, I resorted to narrowing my eyes and turning away. It was all I could do to ignore the wash of longing, the rush of regret. I refused to acknowledge the way my heart ached at the mere sight of him.
Instead, I focused on my anger. Letting every bit of resentment and fury coalesce into a fiery ball in the pit of my stomach, I let that anger drown out the other emotions that made me feel weak and weepy.
I’d already humiliated myself enough over this guy, I wasn’t about to do it again.
“Are you sure—” Collette’s mouth snapped shut when I turned my glare in her direction. She took a step back with her hands up. “Okay then.”
Bianca was next, sidling up next to me while I was warming up at the barre, my eyes fixed on the front of the room rather than the crowd of football players in the back.
“Eve, if you want to switch partners….” Bianca shrugged when I whipped my head to the side to stare at her in shock. “What? I’m not totally heartless, you know. If you want to swap with one of the other girls—”
“No,” I said quickly. I took a deep breath and tried again. “Thank you, but no. That won’t be necessary.”
She studied me for a second and then nodded. “Good for you.”
I reveled in her praise for a moment after she left. It wasn’t every day one got words of encouragement from Bianca.
The moment was ruined when I heard his gruff voice behind me. “Hey, Eve.”
I froze mid-stretch before coming to my senses. It wasn’t like I hadn’t known he would be here. I’d been preparing all day for this.
I spun around to face him, but I didn’t bother with a smile. “Hi.”
“I, uh…” He nodded toward the hallway. “Think we can talk for a minute?”
I shook my head. “Nope.”
I caught the surprise in his eyes and felt a flickering of triumph. That’s right. I was done letting him call all the shots. He wanted to end things. Fine. Then we would end things.
But not until I had the last word.
The sound of the door releasing drew my attention over. The dancers and football players were doing a poor job of sneaking out of the dance studio. I wanted to call them back in and tell them that they weren’t interrupting, but they were gone before I got a word out and Cooper was continuing like he hadn’t even noticed.
“I just wanted to explain,” he started. “I hate how we left things the other day.”
“No need to explain,” I said, turning my gaze back to him. My anger had reached a boiling point. “I got it. You wanted to be with me but not enough to stand up to Trenton.”
“It’s not that simple,” he said. “Trenton has been my friend forever and he didn’t think—”
“Uh uh,” I interrupted harshly.
He stopped talking with another look of surprise.
“This isn’t about Trenton,” I said. “You and I both know that he would have come around. He might have been hurt, and he’d definitely have an opinion, but he’s always loved you like a brother and if he saw the way you treated me, the way you cared about me…” I had to stop to take a deep breath and squelch that choking feeling that told me tears weren’t far behind.
“He would have gotten over it. Heck, he probably would have loved it once he got over the fact that I’m not a little kid anymore.” I lifted a finger and jabbed it in his direction. “So don’t blame this on Trenton. The decision was all yours.”
He opened his mouth like he might respond but he clamped it shut with a short nod. I could see the curious faces of Collette and Bianca in the door next to the window. My cheeks heated. I knew Ms. Boucher would be coming soon. I didn’t have long before we were interrupted.
I planted my hands on my hips and forced a relaxed demeanor, as if my heart hadn’t been broken in two. “Besides, I’ve realized that you were right.”
His expression was comically stunned. “I was?”
I nodded. “You were. You kept saying how I deserved better, and I’ve realized that you’re right. I do deserve better.”
His face was pale but I ignored the guilt. I shoved away the pain. I let myself dwell in anger. “Not because you’re not a good guy or because you’re not good enough for me,” I said. “But because I deserve to be with a guy who cares about me as much as I care for him. I deserve to be with someone who’ll fight for me...to be with me.”