Jordan: She sounds scary.
Me: She’s harmless, but I’ll spare you and not invite her to our meeting.
Me: There’s this coffee shop called the Cup and Quill. Easy to find if you have GPS. Does Saturday work for you?
Jordan: I’ll have to see what my schedule looks like while we’re there and let you know. But a coffee shop sounds good.
Me: It’s a date.
Me: A non-dragon dildo type of date.
Jordan: I’ll make sure to leave mine in the hotel room, then.
I snorted.
Me: Oh my God!!
Me: Did you just make a joke about a sex toy?
Me: My work here is done.
Jordan: Bye, Wilder.
Me: Bye, Precious.
I slipped my phone into the pocket of my jeans and headed to the living room. The grin on my face matched the bubbled excitement bouncing inside my chest.
“Well?” June asked.
“Well, what?” I responded, the gleeful tone earning me a suspicious glare.
“Do I want to know?” she asked as Gwen took her hand.
“I think you might. But I’ll tell you all the sordid details over a plate of sushi.”
“Several plates,” Gwen added.
I was about to agree with her assessment of June’s voracious appetite when I heard a faint meow come from the kitchen.
“What the hell was that?” I asked.
Gwen gave June a pointed look.
“Knew you weren’t listening,” June accused.
Her tone was overly aggressive in my opinion, seeing that there was a small, yet fluffy-looking gray cat sitting on my kitchen floor with a bowl of what looked like tuna under its nose.
“Why is there a cat in my kitchen, June?”
“Happy… birthday?” Gwen shrugged, her burgeoning smile more repentant than celebratory.
“It’s not my birthday for another eight days,” I reminded her, as the pint-sized ball of fur’s tail swished back and forth.
“As I was saying earlier, we found this little guy on the back patio chasing lizards. He looked malnourished so I brought him to an animal shelter. They said if no one claimed him or adopted him they’d euthanize him.” June’s eyes glimmered with unshed tears as she looked down at the fluff ball. “It’s barbaric, Wilder.”
“That’s all very sad, truly, but why is it in my kitchen, June? Tell me you didn’t get me a cat for my birthday.”
“Surprise,” she sang, wiggling her fingers in the air like a cheerleader.
On cue, the cat stood and circled himself around and through my legs until I bent down to pick him up. He had to weigh less than five pounds. His meow was more like a squeak, and though I refused to admit it, the little cotton ball was kind of fucking adorable.
“I hate you,” I said and kissed it on the nose.
The cat snuggled against my chest, looking up at me with big bluish-silver eyes.
June and Gwen were grinning like idiots. “Don’t even look at me like that. What the hell am I going to do with a cat? I’m going to be traveling all over the south for the book tour this fall. I won’t have time to be attached to anything.”
“We’ll watch him while you’re away,” Gwen promised.
The damn thing started purring, the vibration shooting right through my chest to my heart. Goddamn it. I nuzzled my nose on the top of his head.
“I hate that you know me better than I know myself,” I said, my angry tone more for show.
“Aw. Love you too.” June and Gwen both hugged me at the same time. When they finally pulled away, June asked, “What are you going to name him?”
“Gandalf the Grey,” I said proudly and they both rolled their eyes.
“You’re a man-child,” June said, taking the cat from my arms. She kissed it on the nose. “Well, Gandalf, welcome home.”
JAX
Jason walked into my room as I zipped up my duffel bag. He leaned in the doorway, silent, with his arms crossed. The thick slashes of his brow line furrowed. Jason wasn’t your average twenty-five-year-old. He didn’t really give a shit about his appearance. When he wasn’t living in basketball shorts, his jeans were always torn or grass stained. He was lanky in a way he should’ve grown out of, but unlike his friends from high school, the gym and basketball didn’t exist for him anymore. It’s why my guilt soared the longer he stared at me. This house. Me. Our mom. His world, tiny as it was, it’s all he wanted or knew.
“Aw, don’t look at me like that, Jay.” I sat on the foot of my bed and rested my elbows on my knees. “It’s only for the weekend.”
“I heard you talking to Momma. I’m not stupid.”
Anger rolled off his shoulders, crashing against me. I scrubbed a palm over my face with a sigh. “You’re not stupid.”
“Then why are you leaving?” His voice broke, and I struggled to push down the wave of feeling about to drown me.
“Come in here.” He shook his head. “Come on, Jay.”
He gave in and sat down next to me on the bed. His weight pressed against me, I draped my arm over his shoulder, pulling him close.
“I’m not leaving ’cause I think you’re stupid, Jay. It’s a work thing, and I’ll be back Sunday night.”
“You told Mom you might have to stay for two or three months.” He shrugged out of my hold and wiped at his eyes.
Goddamn it, he was crying. Was I really this selfish? If it wasn’t for Wild, I would have never volunteered to go. I hated lying to Jason. But I needed this. I needed the closure. I needed to fix at least one fucked-up thing in my life. Wilder deserved that.
“I’m gonna miss you, too,” I said. “But it’s important that I go. And if I do end up going back for a couple of months, I’m not that far away. I could drive home on the weekends.”
“Who’s gonna take me to the beach, or to the river?”
A sad smile spread across my face. “Mom can take you, or Ms. Arlene.”
Jason’s expression twisted. “They don’t know how to fish.”
“That’s true…” I mussed up his hair with my palm, and he shoved me. I almost fell off the bed, and he laughed. “You think that’s funny?” I asked with humor and attempted to wrestle him into a headlock.
“Stop.” He laughed, breathless. “You win.”
I let go, but instead of pulling away, he grabbed me, wrapped his arms around my ribcage, his cheek against my chest, and hugged me so hard I started to cry. I fucking cried as I turned my body enough that he could give me a real hug. Jason rested his chin on my shoulder, and I held him like that until I got a hold of myself. I was a bastard for putting him through this. Again, my choices had caused my family, my brother, harm.
“When you get back I wanna go fishing,” he said.
Jason stood, shoved his hands into the pockets of his basketball shorts. His eyes red and puffy, but I imagined mine looked about the same.
“Why don’t we go right now?” I asked.
“Yeah? I thought you had to leave.”
The relief in his voice made it easier to breathe.
“Not for a couple of hours.” I stood and slipped my feet into a pair of worn flip flops. “Go grab your stuff.”