“I’m going to miss these hands,” I said. “Among other things.”
He grinned as he lifted my shirt over my head. “Oh yeah, like what?”
A weird knot of nostalgia stuck in my throat as his fingertips painted goosebumps along my ribs. When I didn’t answer him, his smile fell. Always attuned to my mood, he kissed me like I was this delicate, perfect, creature, like all those pieces of him I’d clutched to my chest were about to scatter in the wind.
“Hey,” he said, brushing a thumb over my cheek. “Today is not goodbye, alright?”
“Alright.” The word was a thick whisper.
“And next weekend won’t be either,” he promised. “This trip is not the end of us. It’s just a bump in the road.”
I didn’t want to ruin the last few days I had with him by focusing on how much I would miss him when I was gone, or on the left-over baggage I had from his disappearance back in college.
“Just a bump,” I said and kissed him back.
The soft curve of his top lip, the burn of his stubble, the quiet breath he took every time our mouths parted, these were all the things I’d miss, all the things I’d package and put away for when the miles between us began to overwhelm me.
“We could skip lunch with June and Gwen,” he said, pressing his mouth to the hollow of my throat.
“Because that wouldn’t piss them off at all.”
“I think they’d understand.” Jax drifted his nails down my back. “Tell them the truth. We only have so much time together and we want to spend it… here.”
Smirking, I shook my head. “I’ll call her, and you can tell her.”
His eyes widened. “Me?”
“Sure… just tell her sorry, we’re skipping lunch today because I want to fuck my boyfriend while I still have a chance. And maybe I’ll let him fuck me if he’s lucky.”
He barked out a laugh and squeezed my ass in his hands. “I think that’s exactly what I’m gonna say. Grab your phone.”
As I reached for it, he tackled me, pinning my back to the couch, and crawled over my body. A breathless laugh escaped me as his green eyes turned dark.
“You could if you wanted to,” he said.
“Wanted to what?”
It was clear to me what he meant, but I wanted him to ask for it.
He lowered his lips to my neck, kissing his way along my jaw to my ear and whispered, “To fuck me… if that’s what you want.”
I’d only had Jax like that once while we were at school, and never with anyone else. I wanted to be with Jax in every possible way if he’d let me.
“I don’t want to make you do something you’re not comfortable with.”
He rolled his hips, his cock hard and ready, showing me just how comfortable he was with the whole idea.
“I want to.”
I raked my fingers through his hair as I sat up. The heat between us had always burned quick, igniting with only a hint of spark. Both of us kneeled on the couch, our lips finding each other again. Consumed with the thought of being inside of him, of him giving me his body, his trust, I didn’t care if we’d probably be late for lunch, or if we made it at all, or if June hated me for life. All I wanted was him.
Jax pulled his shirt off, the movement making our bodies wobble on the overly soft cushions.
“Should we take this upstairs?” I asked and laughed against his lips.
He nodded and laced his fingers through mine as we made our way up to my room. Rosie padded behind us and gave me a dirty look as I shut the door in her furry little face. When I turned around, Jax lifted his eyebrow.
“What?” I asked, feigning innocence. “It weirds me out when she’s in here. It’s like she’s watching us.”
Jax pulled me into his chest. “She probably just thinks we’re wrestling.”
“Hmm-mm,” I hummed as his nose tickled the curve of my neck.
With everything outside the door forgotten, I licked his lips, teasing them with my teeth until he opened for me. Kissing like it was the only language we knew, I backed him into the mattress. We shed our clothes without ceremony, clumsy and inelegant with tension, muscle against muscle, we fell into each other on the bed. Jax sat back, resting his head on a pillow, and I kneeled between his legs. His body was stretched out, every perfect, sculpted edge of him on display. He watched me, with his pupils blown wide, as I stroked his dick. Thick and long, the soft skin was hot in my hand. I took my time, exploring, licking, and sucking his cock as Jax sifted his fingers through my hair, whispering dirty encouragements. His confidence had grown over the past few weeks, and I loved how he’d learned what he wanted and asked for it without hesitation.
I left wet kisses down his shaft and his inner thigh as I spread his legs. His breath hitched, a choked gasp catching in his throat as my tongue licked and teased his ass. My cock ached as Jax begged me for relief. Leaking onto the sheet, desperate for friction, I reached over to grab the lube and condom from the drawer. I squeezed a good amount of the liquid onto my fingers. He hadn’t done anything like this in over nine years, and I didn’t want to hurt him. Bringing my lips to the head of his dick, my hand rested between his legs, and as the tip of my finger breached that tight ring of muscle, he swore.
“You okay?” I asked, and he leaned up onto his elbows.
“Yeah.”
He didn’t take his eyes off me as I pushed my finger deeper. His hands clenched into fists at his side as his head fell back.
“I can stop, Jax... if you need me to.”
“Feels… good.”
His head hit the pillow as I worked a second finger inside of him.
“Oh fuck… God… Wild, I need…” he mumbled, his words disjointed as my fingers brushed his prostate.
“What do you need?” I asked before I took his cock into my mouth again.
A string of incoherent syllables poured past his lips until he uttered one word. “You.”
Adding more lube to my fingers I slipped in a third, pushing his limits. Pressing a soft kiss on his thigh, to the patch of pale hair just above his shaft, I stroked him, matching the slow, even rhythm of my fingers, and his cock swelled in my hand. His eyes were closed, his lips open, inviting me to taste them. Leaning over his chest, I dusted my mouth over his. Jax cupped the back of my neck. His tongue warm on my lips as my fingers slipped from between his legs, and I drowned in the tortured, heavy way he kissed me.
Rising back onto my knees, I opened the condom. Overstimulated and sensitive, I grit my teeth as I rolled it on. Jax spread his legs wide for me, his eyes locking on mine as I stroked myself, my fingers slippery with lube.
“Tell me to stop if it hurts.”
He nodded as I pressed against his entrance. Breathing hard, dying a little for every second that passed as the head of my cock pushed inside him. He was so fucking tight. I held my body still, not trusting myself to hold off, craving more, and wondering how I’d let myself forget this, forget how amazing he felt.
“Can you take more?”
“Yes…” he panted, his fingers digging into my hips.
I eased in gradually at first, until I couldn’t take it anymore, and sank as deep as his body would allow.
“Jesus…” I groaned, bending down, I held the weight of my body with my forearms and kissed him.