There are a million questions I have for her about how we ended up here…but none of them matter right now.
Bringing her hand to my lips, I give her a kiss.
Then I stand up.
Because I am not watching her wither away like this.
I refuse to.
The girl I love isn’t a goddamn wilting flower.
She’s a motherfucking fighter.
All her life she’s been fighting society, the assholes who bullied her…even her own mother.
But right now, I need her to fight for me…for us.
“You better fucking fight, Bible Thumper.” Leaning over the bed, I glare at her. “Fight for me the way I fought for you…because I can’t do this without you.”
I won’t.
Without her...there is no me.
Chapter 91
Cole
I hear bickering in the hall the second I walk outside her room.
“Everything was great before she started hanging out with you,” Dylan screams at Bianca. “You screwed her up with all your manipulation and bullshit. Constantly making her feel like she wasn’t good enough. She’s dying in there because of you.”
“Kind of like what you did to Liam?” Bianca snaps.
Jesus. This is the last thing Sawyer would want.
Before anyone can stop her, Dylan swings her fist into Bianca’s face. “You little bitch.”
“Hey.” Wrapping his arms around her waist, Jace yanks his girlfriend back. “That’s enough.”
Mouth open in shock, Bianca places her hand on her red cheek. “Did you seriously just punch me?”
Bianca lunges toward Dylan, but Oakley grabs her. “He said enough.”
The fact Oakley’s still here tells me he still hasn’t told them the truth yet.
I stride toward them, but Dylan’s isn’t done.
“God, your family is so fucked up.” She’s screaming at Jace, attempting to wiggle out of his arms, but it’s obvious her actual wrath is directed at me and Bianca. “Why did they have to mess with her? She was perfect.” Big, ugly tears roll down her cheeks as she looks my way. “She was so fucking perfect and he ruined her…because that’s what Cole does. He shatters amazing people…right before they die.”
Bianca rears back like she’s been punched again and Jace filches.
I just stand there and take it.
Dylan’s angry and confused. She needs someone to blame. I get it.
Dylan’s eyes sharpen on me. “She was perfect, and she loved you so, so much. All she ever wanted was to be good enough for you…and you destroyed her.”
Dylan’s right. I do destroy people.
But I never wanted to destroy Sawyer.
All I wanted to do was love her.
“No, he didn’t,” Oakley whispers, his voice hoarse. “Cole wasn’t the one supplying Sawyer with Adderall for months…I was.”
“Let me go,” Dylan grunts, slapping Jace’s arm.
When he does, she gets in Oakley’s face. “Tell me you’re joking.” The sorrow in her expression is replaced by pure rage as she shoves him. “Tell me you’re fucking joking, Oakley.”
There are tears in Oakley’s eyes when he looks at her.
Good. Hurt, motherfucker.
“I’ve been working for Loki, and Sawyer asked me to get—”
The sharp sting of Dylan’s hand slapping his already bruised cheek is so loud I feel it. “You’re disgusting.” Dropping her voice, she leans in close. “You better pray she’s okay. Because if she’s not…I will never fucking forgive you.”
She stalks off in a cloud of fury.
Jace glares at Oakley. “Jesus Christ. I don’t even know what to say to you right now.” His gaze shifts to Bianca and then me before settling on Bianca. “I always put you first. Every single fucking time I choose you and this goddamn family over her.” He backs away. “Not anymore.”
“Jace,” Bianca calls out, her voice trembling.
Ignoring her, he chases after Dylan.
I look at Oakley. “Tell her parents. Now.”
“I already did. I was coming out here to tell everyone else too, but Dylan and Bianca were already fighting when I came back.” He exhales a shaky breath. “I’m sorry—”
“Don’t. An apology won’t fix this, asshole.”
“I know it won’t,” He braces himself against the wall. “I just—”
His eyes roll back and his body breaks out in a fit of jerks and shakes.
Bianca’s quick on her feet and makes herself a cushion for him before he hits the floor and cracks his head.
“Cole, I need your help. He’s too heavy.”
He’s the last person in the world I want to help right now…but I know Sawyer would want me to.
So I do.
“Was Dylan right? Did I destroy you? Is that how we ended up here?”
Just like the last twenty-four hours…I get no response from her.
The doctors are concerned…but they said to give it a little more time.
I’ve got nothing but time for her.
“I’m sorry I called you fat that day. I’m sorry I joined the group of assholes who hurt you…but I swear I didn’t fucking mean it.”
I intertwine my fingers with hers. “I’ll love you at a hundred pounds and I’ll love you at five-hundred pounds.” I bring her hand to my lips. “I’ll love you in whatever shape and form you come in…because you’re you.”
Rising off the chair, I lean over her bed. “If you’re still mad at me for what I did…then wake up and fight with me. Scream that I’m an asshole…break my fucking heart and leave my ass…but please…come back.”
Because without her…there is no me.
Chapter 92
Cole
I watch in confusion as they cart her bed down the hall.
It’s only been a little over forty-eight hours since she was admitted, so I don’t understand the sudden room switch.
I look at her parents. “Why are they moving her?”
They exchange a forlorn glance.
Mr. Church glances at his wife. “I’ll tell him. You go grab us some more coffee.”
Teary-eyed, Mrs. Church nods before she takes off.
Apprehension rises in my throat. “Tell me what?”
He puts his arm around me. “Come on, let’s take a walk.”
I maneuver away from him. “I don’t want to take a walk. I want to know what’s going on with Sawyer.”
He motions for me to sit down on a nearby chair, but I don’t.
With a heavy sigh, he points to a large room with clear walls near the nurse’s station. “They’re moving her there so they can keep a better eye on her…make sure they don’t miss any signs that she’s improving.”
“How can they look for signs of improvement when she can’t move because she’s in a coma? A coma they put her in.”
His shoulders slump. “There is no easy way to say this.” Folding his hands, he looks down at the floor. “The doctor said we’d know more about her outcome after the first forty-eight hours. But the first forty-eight hours have come and gone…and she’s still not improving.” His eyes close. “The lack of improvement isn’t because of the coma…it’s because she’s not responding.”