The music is loud, pounding out. We push through the throng and are shown to a separate VIP area and are all handed a glass of champagne.
Lucas looks at it with disdain. ‘WTF?’ he mouths at me. ‘Where’s the beer?’
I shrug as speaking to him would be pointless. Shelby is immediately swamped by his actor friends and we hang about on the periphery.
‘This is fun,’ Lucas yells in my ear.
I’m getting a headache already and I think it’s a bad idea to knock back the champagne, but we’ve had nothing to eat or drink for hours.
A tray of canapes passes us by. Pigs in blankets, tiny bites of barbequed ribs, mini Yorkshire puddings with beef in them. In fact, they all appear to be meat-based.
‘Dead animals,’ Lucas grumbles. ‘I just knew it.’
Shelby is busy, surrounded by his co-stars. There’s much joking and laughter. A couple of the younger girls flirt with him and giggle at his stories. It makes my heart tighten and reminds me of when we met and he was dating Scarlett Vincent, an actress half his age. It doesn’t help that I hang back, avoiding the limelight. I should try to join in, be by his side, part of his circle, but I realise that my social skills and capacity for small talk are still woefully lacking.
‘I saw a vegan place across the road,’ I say to Lucas. ‘I think it was still open. Want to duck out and get something to eat?’
‘Yeah.’ Lucas looks weak with relief.
I try to catch Shelby’s eye to tell him that we’re popping out for a few minutes to grab some food, but I can’t and there’s no hope of getting across the room to him. Instead, I send him a text. Hopefully, we’ll be back before he notices we’re gone.
After the fug of the bar, the fresh air on the street hits me and a gulp it down gratefully.
‘That was hideous,’ I say to Lucas as we dash over the road.
‘The bar was the best bit,’ he counters and makes me laugh.
The vegan café – Green World – is still open and we order wraps with falafel, red pepper hummus and spinach. But it’s the cup of hot tea that I’m most grateful for.
I text Matt. Everything OK?
All still standing. Don’t worry.
At last, some good news.
We sit and eat in silence, Lucas wolfing down his food as if he hasn’t been fed for a week rather than a few hours. Eventually, Lucas stops chewing long enough to say, ‘It’s better when it’s just me and you.’
‘Soon it will be a lot more than that.’
‘We’re not going to be able to tell him tonight,’ Lucas notes. ‘He’s in his own little Shelby World.’
‘I know.’ I look at Lucas and smile sadly. ‘We can’t put it off for ever, but now isn’t the right time. Perhaps there’ll be an opportunity.’
We both know our chances are slim.
‘I know you think he’s the best thing since sliced bread, but we’re barely on his radar. His poncy actor friends are more important to him. You saw that. This is your future,’ he warns with an insight that belies his years.
‘It’s his world, his work.’
‘You keep telling yourself that,’ Lucas says as he polishes off his wrap.
When he pushes away his plate, I venture, ‘We’d better get back before he misses us.’
Lucas groans, but stands up and we walk back to Club Escape. It’s late now, the street only peopled by drunks and those soon to be drunk. I have never wanted my own bed more in my life.
We go into the bar and, sure enough, Shelby is still holding court.
‘We should just go back to the hotel,’ Lucas says. ‘He doesn’t give a fuck.’
‘We’ll say we’re leaving,’ I tell him. ‘Then we’ll head back there.’
So we squeeze and ease through the crowd until I reach Shelby’s elbow.
‘Hey,’ I say over the noise and he turns round.
Rather than being pleased to see me, his face darkens. ‘Where the hell have you been? I’ve looked everywhere for you!’
‘Where?’ I ask. Seems to me he’s in exactly the same place as when we left half an hour ago.
‘I didn’t know where you’d gone,’ he insists.
‘I couldn’t attract your attention. You were busy.’ It sounds barbed. ‘I texted you.’
He pulls his phone out of his pocket and reads my text. ‘I didn’t hear it. It’s so bloody noisy in here.’
Quite.
‘Lucas and I are just heading back to the hotel. It’s late and it’s been a long day.’
‘The party’s still in full swing,’ Shelby says.
‘There’s no need for you to leave. Stay. Enjoy yourself.’
Shelby steps away from his friends and pulls me to one side. ‘Tonight didn’t go as I’d planned,’ he says. ‘I’m truly sorry. I thought we’d have time for a nice dinner before the show.’
‘It doesn’t matter. Really.’ I’m disappointed, but this is
Shelby’s life and it’s me who is the square peg in the round hole – as always. He could have made more effort, it’s true, but – I sigh to myself – he didn’t and that’s life too.
‘I should have introduced you around to the rest of the cast.’ He takes my hand. ‘Have another glass of champagne. Come and meet them now.’
I can’t think of anything worse. ‘I’m tired, Shelby,’ I say. ‘We’ll leave you to it. I’ll see you when you get back to the hotel.’
‘Of course, I won’t stay. Give me five minutes. Let me say goodnight to everyone and then I’m all yours.’
‘If you’re sure.’
Shelby moves back into his crowd. I turn to Lucas and puff out a heavy breath. He pulls out his phone. ‘He’ll be an hour,’ he mutters.
In the end, Shelby is considerably longer than five minutes but less than an hour. Lucas and I wait, if not all that patiently.
Eventually, Shelby joins us all smiles and apologies and we walk together to the hotel. I’m glad it’s not far as Lucas is all angles and tension. And I’ve got the mother of all headaches.
Chapter Fifty-One
‘We should have a drink in the bar,’ Shelby says when we’re in reception. ‘A last snifter.’
‘I’m tired,’ I say. ‘I’d rather go to bed, if you don’t mind.’
‘I’m off.’ Lucas turns towards the lifts, making his escape as soon as he can. ‘I’ll leave you two lovebirds to it.’
‘Goodnight, son!’ Shelby holds up a hand to wave. ‘It’s been great having you here.’
To Lucas’s credit he doesn’t say what I know will be going through his mind.
Then Shelby turns to me. ‘He’s a great kid. You’ve done a fantastic job with him.’
He’s talking as if he’s spent the entire evening chatting with his only child whereas he’s pretty much ignored both of us. I’m sure if he really knew what was going on in Lucas’s life – our life – he wouldn’t be quite so jolly.
‘One drink.’ He takes my hand and pulls me towards the empty bar. ‘A nightcap. Humour me.’