“I am not!” She snapped then huffed and wrapped her arms around Ryan as she rubbed against him like a little kitten. “What about a picnic? Ryan had Connor make up a picnic basket for us on our first date. We didn’t eat much of it, but it was really romantic. I bet if you asked Connor, he’d do one for you.”
“Do I look like a picnic kind of guy to you?”
“Do I?” Ryan answered, challenging me. “On second thoughts, don’t answer that.”
Emily sighed, rubbing her hand over Ryan’s stomach, and I could tell I probably had about three minutes left before he kicked me out.
“Ryan buys me chocolates. Last week, when it was my time of the month-”
I held my hand up. “Yeah, I think that’s a bit too much information, Em.” I said, grimacing.
“What? It was sweet. I was in pain and he did something thoughtful. He’s always thoughtful.” She peered up at him, and from the heated stare he gave her, I knew the minutes counting down my departure were now seconds.
“Chocolate. Great. I’ll do that,” I said, standing up to leave. Neither one of them made any effort to get up or see me to the door, and when Ryan threaded his hand into the back of her hair and pulled her to him for a kiss, I knew my time was up. “I’ll see myself out,” I shouted as I banged the door closed. But once I was stood outside, I smiled.
I wanted that.
To be so consumed by another person and for them to be totally and utterly lost in me, that the rest of the world just falls away.
I wanted that with her.
So maybe I needed to start taking other people’s advice. I needed to tell her about Pat, and I had to make the effort to be what she needed me to be. I had to try harder.
I was trying to keep myself busy and steer my mind away from a certain bad boy who was dominating my thoughts recently, so I decided to bake some cookies. Who I was baking them for, I had no idea. Mum and Dad had gone away for the night to some spa retreat. Dad thought a facial and massage would help bring Mum back from the zombie state she was living in. I suppose I shouldn’t have mocked him for making the effort. It was a nice gesture. But it left me alone with nothing but my thoughts and a mountain of chocolate chip cookies that would probably go to waste. I’d even decided to wear one of my summer dresses too. I was channelling the fifties housewife vibes pretty damn well.
I was just contemplating boxing some cookies up to take to the neighbours when I heard a knock at the front door. I wiped my hands clean on my apron, took it off, and wandered down the corridor to find out who it was. When I opened the door, I was surprised to find Brandon standing in front of me with a confused look on his face, holding up a carrier bag.
“I bought you these,” he said, shoving the bag forward for me to take and walking past me into the house. “It smells fucking awesome in here. What are you cooking?”
I frowned and shut the door. I couldn’t remember inviting him in, but then, I guessed Brandon never waited for an invite. If he wanted something, he went for it.
“I was baking cookies. Not sure why though. My Mum and Dad are away.”
Brandon’s eyes lit up like I’d told him they were liquid gold and he grabbed one off the cooling rack and ate it, even though it was probably still hot and would scald his mouth.
“I always knew you were my ideal woman. Baking cookies and waiting for me to show up.” He winked like it was some inside joke and I stared back at him blankly.
He grabbed another one, as the first obviously didn’t touch the sides, and I placed the carrier bag on the kitchen work surface and opened it up to see what he’d bought for me. I frowned even harder when I saw a pile of chocolate bars. There must’ve been every Cadbury bar ever made in there. Why was he bringing me a mountain of chocolate?
“I don’t get it?” I asked, feeling confused. “Is this a joke I don’t know about? Or are you trying to give me diabetes?” I was surely missing something here.
“I wanted to do something nice for you,” he said, like it was the simplest thing in the world. “I didn’t know what to get you though, and Emily told me Ryan buys her chocolate when it’s her… you know… time of the month and all that. She said it’s romantic.” He shrugged, taking another bite of his cookie. “I figured flowers were a no-go, so I went with the chocolate.”
I couldn’t stop myself from laughing. Not in an unkind way. It really was sweet, but he was totally clueless. So clueless it was actually endearing.
“What’s so funny?” he asked, laughing along with me through his mouthful of cookie.
“You. I don’t think this is what Emily meant when she said to buy chocolate. It’s really sweet that you wanted to do that though,” I added after seeing the way his face dropped.
“I’m trying to be different. I wanted to do something that wasn’t the usual crappy Brandon effort.” It made my heart hurt to hear him talk like that about himself.
“Nothing you do is crappy, Brandon. Please don’t say that. And don’t think you have to do anything special for me either. I’m the least high maintenance girl you’ll ever meet.”
“That’s probably a good thing then.”
I knew what he meant. He thought if my standards were low then he’d have more chance of living up to them. I was starting to be able to read him a little more clearly and it surprised me how low his self-esteem was.
“I like you, Brandon, just the way you are. I don’t need you to change or try to be something you’re not around me. I’ve had a lifetime of fake people and lies. One of the things I love about you is your honesty. There’s no bullshit where you’re concerned.” I took a breath and watched as his eyes widened. Had I said too much? “Please don’t change. I know exactly what I’m getting into here, with you. I know who you are.”
He nodded and a small grin appeared on his ruggedly handsome face. I liked his cheeky grins.
“I’m a fighter. I always will be.” He lifted his chin, trying to look tough, but after wolfing down half a batch of cookies and standing in my kitchen with twenty or more chocolate bars in his bag, I knew he was anything but.
“Yep. Yes, you are,” I said. He liked that, I could tell, because his grin grew wider.
“And I’ll fight for you too.” He took a step closer to me and I stood my ground. I could feel the atmosphere in the room becoming heated… electric.
“I know you will.”
“So, no more chocolate?” He nodded down to the bag and I gave a low, throaty chuckle.
“I love chocolate. But you don’t have to buy up the whole shop. And I’m not on my period, so-” I raised my eyebrows at him, and he took another step towards me.
“That’s good to know.” I watched as his gaze travelled over my face, lingering on my lips, and then he looked me in the eyes. “No parents today?” He cocked his head to the side and bit his lip.
“No. They’re away for the night. They-” I didn’t get chance to finish my sentence because he crashed his lips to mine and kissed me hard and forcefully. His hands cupped my face and held me in place as he took what he wanted. What we both wanted.
I groaned into the kiss and he pushed his hips forward, trapping me against the kitchen counter. I put my arms around his neck and pulled him into me further, not that that was possible. We were already plastered together. I scraped my nails across the back of his head through his hair and he moaned, moving his hands down to wrap around my waist and then grab my ass.