My phone buzzes in my purse and I pull away from her as I suck in a breath and wipe the tears from my cheeks, clenching my teeth in an attempt to stop new ones from falling. “Ugh, God, I don’t have time for this right now. I have to get going.”
“Maybe you should take the day off. I’m sure Willa can handle everything for one day.”
“No,” I answer, shaking my head. “I can’t just sit here moping all day. I need a distraction. I’ll be home before you have to leave for class, though.”
She nods and I peek down at Brooklyn, who’s staring up at me with concerned eyes and I suck in a breath, forcing a smile to my face.
“Have a good day with Auntie Alice, baby.” I blow her a kiss but the scowl doesn’t leave her face as she watches me. My smart girl knows something serious is going on. Even at only fourteen months old, we can’t slip anything past her.
“I’ll put Beauty and the Beast on to try and cheer her up a little,” Alice assures me and I nod, hoping that her favorite movie will be able to distract her from the fact that Lucas is this giant gaping hole in our lives right now.
“Okay, I’m leaving, then.” I turn toward the door and pull my phone out of my purse. There’s a text from Willa and I read it as I open the door and step outside.
Willa:
Coming into work today, boss lady?
Me:
On my way now.
I sigh as I put my phone back in my purse and instead of walking down the steps to my car, I turn toward the swing on the far end of the porch. As I sink into the seat and sway back and forth, a few tears slip down my cheeks. Alice is right - I need to go to the police and finally put an end to this two year long nightmare. I’m just terrified that it’s going to cost me everything that I’ve been building for my life.
My mind drifts to the morning after being raped. Grams was by my side through the night as they administered the rape kit and she held me as I cried. I can still hear her telling me that I was too strong to let this beat me. As I suck in a breath, I feel a little bit of that strength returning and I know it’s time to handle this. Despite what happens between Lucas and me, I do deserve justice.
I pull my phone out of my purse and hesitate for a second before dialing Lucas’s number. His voice mail picks up and I close my eyes, summoning the courage I need to leave this message. When the beep sounds, I take a deep breath and open my eyes.
“Hi. It’s me. I just… I wanted to call you and let you know that I’ll be going to the police station tomorrow to give them the information on your brother.” My lip wobbles as tears form in my eyes again. “This is so hard for me and I know how hard it must be for you. Just know that whatever you decide, I don’t blame you for anything. I could never ask you to choose between the two of us and I understand your loyalty to him. If I don’t hear from you again, I want you to know that I love you and I’m so grateful for the time we had together. You taught me to trust and love again and you’re always going to hold a special place in my heart. I hope, one day, you can find happiness because that’s what I truly want for you, Lucas. I just want you to be happy and get the life you deserve.” I bite my lip to hold back the sob that desperately wants to break free. “Good-bye.”
Chapter Twenty
Quinn
“Are you sure you don’t want me to go with you?” Alice asks, bouncing Brooklyn on her hip and I shake my head, forcing a smile to my face. My stomach feels uneasy but I know that this has to be done. Even if a part of me still doesn’t want to.
“No. I don’t know how long it will take and I don’t want her there.”
She sighs, glancing toward the front door. “I’m not happy that you’re going alone. You should have someone there with you.”
“I’ll be okay, Al,” I whisper, thinking back to the message I left for Lucas yesterday as I fight back tears. When I called him, I truly meant what I said. I had no expectations but I can’t deny that not hearing from him hurts. I guess it’s time to come to terms with the fact that things are truly over between us.
“Maybe Willa could go with you or something. Or I could ask her to babysit Brooklyn and I’ll go with you.”
I shake my head and force a smile to my face. “I need to do this alone, Sis, but I appreciate the thought.”
“Well… if you’re sure.”
“I am,” I answer, nodding as I grab my purse and turn toward the front door, sucking in a breath.
“You’ve got this,” Alice calls as I grab the doorknob. “And call me if you need anything.”
I nod in response as I pull the door open and step outside.
“Quinn.”
I gasp as his voice melts over me like chocolate and tingles race up my spine. I turn to the swing on the other end of the porch where he’s sitting with his elbows propped on his knees with a ball cap on his head. My stomach rolls. My heart skips a beat.
Oh, God, he’s here to end it.
“Lucas,” I breathe, blinking back tears. He looks up and as soon as our eyes meet, it punches me in the gut, stealing the air from my lungs as my heart thunders against my ribs. “What are you doing here?”
He stands. “I’m here for you.”
“I don’t understand,” I whisper, my mind completely blank as he walks toward me, looking just as fine as he did the first time I met him. Gripping the railing, I suck in a breath and fight the urge to close my eyes just to breathe in his familiar scent.
“I got your message last night and I’m going to the police station with you.”
“But what about your brother?”
He shakes his head. “What about him?”
“Are you really just going to turn your back on him? Just like that?”
“No,” he snaps, closing the distance between us and pulling me into his arms. “Not just like that. I’ve killed myself for years, trying to help him and now, to know that he was out there hurting people, hurting you.” He reaches up and brushes his thumb over my cheek. “The woman that I know with every ounce of my soul was made for me - it makes me sick to my stomach. I can’t protect him anymore.”
“Lucas,” I gasp, shaking my head. “I can’t ask you to do that to him. He’s your brother.”
“I’m not doing anything to him, Quinn. I’m just not cleaning up his messes anymore. This is one mistake that he’s going to have to own.”
I shake my head, staring down at the boards of the porch. “I don’t know what to say. Your support is exactly what I had hoped for but I can’t get rid of this guilt I feel for what I’m doing to you.”
“No,” he growls and my gaze flicks up to his. “I don’t ever want to hear you talk like that again. You’re not doing anything to me. You’re not doing anything to Clay. You are the victim here and you deserve to get justice for what was done to you.”
“I can’t ask you to do this to him. He’s your brother, Lucas.”
“Baby,” he urges, cupping both sides of my face in his hands as he forces my gaze to his. “Listen to me. You’re not asking anything of me. I’m choosing to do this. I love my brother but he needs to face the consequences this time and I would be turning him in whether we were together or not.”