And then she says my name, “Hi Kash,” and I slide to a stop.
Oh, fuck…
This year just won’t stop.
2
Jolie
I knew coming here was a chance, but I don’t know where my brother is. He wasn’t at his house. It’s been six years since I’ve seen him, and it’s not like I texted I was coming.
I just had to get out of Texas.
But I hoped that the fates wouldn’t be cruel enough to do this.
Kash Dameon.
There’s no time like the present, as my mother—God rest her soul—would say.
“Hi, Kash.”
He slides to a stop and shakes his head. “Jolie?”
I set the carrier to my side.
His eyes narrow in on the baby and my heart pounds in my chest.
“Jolie!” I hear called out from behind him. “No way! Your brother is going to flip his lid.”
A thin, lanky man bounds around Kash and lifts me up.
“Payne.” I squeeze him so hard his head might pop off.
He sets me down and then his eyes catch the baby carrier. “Oh, shit…when did this happen?”
I swallow because someone’s going to put the number in order and I know Payne is good with numbers. It’s why my brother Cray hired him to be his righthand man in opening the shop.
“About six weeks ago.” I can’t look at Kash. He’ll know.
Payne squats and pulls the blanket that was protecting her from the sun off.
Everything is pink, so it’s not hard to tell her gender.
“She’s beautiful.” Payne looks up. “What’s her name?”
I raise my eyes to Kash’s. This is the moment. The one where he’ll know. “Jessica—Jess for short.”
Kash’s face pales. “Really?” he asks and Payne looks back at him.
“What?”
Kash straightens his back. Those broad shoulders stretching the T-shirt until it’s read to Hulk-rip right off of him.
He knows, and there’s no denying it. She even looks like her daddy. And she’s as charming and assertive as him, too.
I clear my throat. “Jessica Lynn…Creager-Rhodes.”
Payne stands quickly and looks back to Kash. “Oh, fuck…”
Yeah, exactly what we did.
Kash
Looks like I’m a dad. But in my next breath I feel like the world’s changed. The universe finally righted itself. I’m a dad.
And since the squeaky, little doll has my last name, I’m going to go with Jolie wants me to be involved. Now why she didn’t tell me before, that’s something she and I will have to discuss. But right now, in front of Payne and Kylie is not the time.
“Are you going to say something?” she asks me as Payne slips off with his arm around a woman.
“Good luck, bro.”
And then it really hits me. What I’ve done. I impregnated Cray’s sister. I didn’t know her last name. She spoke over it when Payne introduced her, all I knew her as was “Jolie”. Now I know. Creager. Cray’s last name—Theodore Creager. I only know because it’s on the occupancy permit from the city. He goes by Cray because of something from his past. I’ve never asked, didn’t think I needed to know. But maybe I do now.
The dominos fall in my head. Cray is not going to like this.
Not one bit.
I have a feeling we’re about to see Cranky-Cray again.
And no one will like that.
“You and…a baby…we…” I seem to be looking for words that just aren’t there.
She moves forward, her body is just like the last time I saw her. Curves that resemble a fine vase, tiny waist, large hips. I remember those hips in my hands. Swaying to the crooning country music from my truck as we danced in the truck bed under the Texas stars. I swear there are more of them there. Everything is bigger in Teas, after all.
And I made a bigger mistake.
Payne and Kylie come back with their bags. Jolie and I have only be staring at each after my choppy non-sentence fumbling of words.
“See you tomorrow…” Payne offers.
“I’m off this weekend for the holiday.”
“See you at Cray’s party?” he asks quietly.
“Maybe.”
“Yeah, maybe not,” he mumbles and Kylie’s eyebrows peak.
“Bye Kash.”
“Later, Kylie.”
And then with a click of the lock, Kylie’s made it so no one else can come in. It’s just me and Jolie.
The one who…I left.
She looks back. “I gotta get back to my SUV. It’s still running. Locked, but running. I brought my cat and dog along with me.”
I take a step forward. “Are you staying?”
Her giant blue eyes, sparkle in the overhead lights. “I know this is a lot to take Kash.”
I step around her and look down at the tiny body in the car seat carrier. “Jess…” I say the name and a shiver goes up my spine.
“Are you mad?” she asks.
I inhale a long breath and turn to her. “No. Not at all. I’m…” I fight to find the word, “surprised and a little confused. You said you were on the pill.”
She looks down at the floor.
“Jolie, were you?”
“I was. It just…happened.” She looks down at our daughter, sleeping so soundly. “I’m sorry. And when I found out, I wanted to have a baby. You were…are…a great guy. I don’t expect you to do anything. I…I can handle this on my own.”
“Why didn’t you let me know?”
“Because I thought maybe you’d be mad? And…well, the other thing.” She rolls her eyes and we both know what that is.
“Cray,” we say together and both chuckle. The moment a little lighter, but right now I’m dying for all this weight to be a helium balloon and fly away.
“Do you know where he is?”
“Probably over at Naomi’s.”
“Naomi?” she asks.
I shake my head. “How long since you’ve talked to Cray?”
She looks away. “Too long.”
“How long, Jolie?”
“Four years, talked, and six years since I’ve seen him.”
“And you’re here because?”
“Because I want to make things right. I want my daughter to know her uncle.” She steps forward and we’re only inches apart. “Her father, too.” After a long pause she adds, “If you want.”
I really don’t know. I wasn’t looking to be a dad. I wasn’t looking to have the responsibility, but when that tiny body wails out something in my snaps.
I hear you universe. I hear you.
3
Jolie
I suppose that could have gone worse. And I wish it would’ve gone better. I was really hoping it was late enough at the shop that he wouldn’t be there and I’d have time to figure it out. That didn’t happen.
But I guess the Band-Aid’s off. And the wound feels like it’s gaping.
“Are you okay?” he asks.