I would have gotten out of my car and met him halfway, but he would have complained about me opening my own door. Slowly, he walked over to me with that sexy ass saunter that I couldn’t get enough of. When he made it to my door, he ran his fingers down the edges of his mouth as he looked me over, causing me to blush.
Ishmael opened my door, and I wasted no time hopping out of the car and rushing into his arms. He chuckled before it turned into a quiet moan as he squeezed me tightly and placed a kiss to my neck.
“Damn I missed you, love,” he confessed, then kissed my ear in a way that made me shiver.
“I missed you too. Can I sleep with you tonight?”
“You ain’t even gotta ask.”
Ishmael squeezed my ass as he looked down at me. The sight of those eyes lowering as he tugged his bottom lip between his teeth had my pussy pulsing. It had been a whole eight days since I’d had him inside of me. After my period was over, three more days passed of us being apart. And I couldn’t wait to feel him deeply stretching my walls tonight.
He took my hand into his, and we headed towards the entrance. We talked about our days so far and what we wanted to have for lunch. There was a Chili’s and Cheesecake Factory in the food court, but we decided on Chili’s. They had some pretty decent ribs and street corn. My stomach started grumbling just at the thought of those ribs, so I wanted to get this shopping done as quickly as possible.
Ishmael was as much help as he could be with something like this. Shopping for little girls clothing wasn’t really his thing. He just said yea or no when I asked him if something was cute. It didn’t surprise me that our styles were totally and completely different. Everything I loved he hated.
“You want kids one day?” he asked, catching me completely off guard.
But I guess I should have known we were going to have to have this conversation one day. We’d already discussed marriage, and both of us were open to it.
“Um. I don’t know. Never really thought it would fit with my lifestyle. You?”
“Yea. I’m trying to wait until I get out the game, though.”
“And when will that be?”
Ishmael shrugged as he picked up a pink shirt that was surprisingly cute. “When I get married and have a reason to.”
I didn’t want to have this conversation, not right now at least, so I nodded and forced a smile as I walked towards the shoes. JD wanted everything he would need to make sure his daughter was straight from head to toe. It took about an hour and a half to get everything, but thankfully, I only had to go to three stores to do so.
When I was done shopping, we headed to the food court to grab something to eat. I got the platter that had chicken tenders, ribs, French fries, and street corn. Ishmael got the same thing, except he got the three meat option that had brisket as well. The shit was nasty as hell, so he ended up sending it back and getting these little polish sausage bites with cheese in them.
Since I got everything together fairly quickly, I checked with JD to see if I could drop off the delivery tomorrow. He told me I could when he got off work, so I added him to my calendar when I got home. We were going to go to Ishmael’s house, but since I had to package the delivery for JD and an additional one for two other clients, we decided to stay at my house instead.
Ishmael helped me package the deliveries as we sat on the floor in the middle of my living room. We didn’t talk, but I had a motivational playlist playing in the background. I wouldn’t necessarily say that things had been awkward between us since the whole conversation about kids came up, but Ishmael had grown a little quiet as if he had something on his mind. It was my own paranoia that had me wanting to ask him if everything was okay, but if he said yes, then he would expect me to elaborate on my issue.
After putting the small extra gift I’d gotten for JD’s daughter inside of the box, we were done. Since we were going to be in for the night, I figured I would let Ishmael decide what we could do because he had been such a big help with getting my orders ready. I thought he was going to say he just wanted to chill in the bed and watch animal documentaries since he’d been so quiet and distant, but he told me it was up to me.
“Is everything okay, Ish?”
“Yea.” He nodded, lowering his head to check his phone. “What’s up?”
“Nothing it just… seems like you’ve been a little distant since we had that talk in the mall.”
He smirked, head still buried in his phone. “There’s something I’ve never told you, or anyone else for that matter. I try not to think about it, but it hit me right after that. Fucked with me, but I’m good.”
I didn’t want him to feel forced to talk to me about it, especially if it was something that bothered him, but I did let him know, “I’m here if you ever want to talk about it.”
Ishmael released a sigh as he put his phone down. His head tilted as he avoided my eyes and shook his head. “Ain’t shit to talk about, but I guess you have the right to know since it’s fuckin’ up my mood.”
“Ish.” Smiling softly, I crawled closer to him so that we were seated directly in front of each other. I crossed my legs Indian Style while his were spread wide enough for me to sit comfortably between them. “I don’t expect you to always be in a good mood and making me laugh. You’re entitled to everything you feel. I just want you to know that I’m here for you if you need me.”
His eyes found mine – finally. “Jessica was pregnant when she was killed.”
My heart plummeted as my eyes watered. I most certainly wasn’t expecting that to be what came out of his mouth. Worst case, I thought he would be like… he felt like I didn’t really want kids and he did.
“I’m so sorry, baby.” I didn’t even know what to say as I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him. At first, his grip around me was weak, but the longer I held him the stronger it grew. He buried his face in my neck, and the second I felt the wetness of his tears my own began to form. I held him tighter, wishing I could give him whatever the fuck it was he needed in this moment. Because no. He was too damn good of a man to be stained with this pain.
After placing a few kisses to his neck, I moved up to his cheek and kissed his tears away. Our foreheads rested against each other as his eyes remained closed. Ishmael inhaled a deep breath as his hands remained at my waist.
“God, I’m sorry. I don’t know what to say, but I’m here.”
He smiled softly before assuring me with, “And your presence is always enough.”
Ishmael removed his forehead from mine and opened his eyes. I wiped the remnants of his tears away as he stared lovingly at me. And in that moment, I couldn’t keep, “I love you, Ishmael,” from falling from my lips. Seemed like the right time. Not just because he was down but because I couldn’t contain it anymore. Gripping his chin, I pulled him to my lips and kissed him tenderly.
He put me on his lap as he requested, “Tell me that shit while you sit on my dick,” and honestly, there was nothing else in this moment that I would rather do.
As I unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, he hiked my skirt up and pushed my panties to the side. Almost always I had on a skirt or dress with heels, flats, or sandals, and moments like this made me glad I loved clothing that gave easy access. There was no need for foreplay; he was hard as hell and I was wet as hell. Ishmael lifted me and slowly slid me down his dick.