There’s nowhere else I’d rather be right now, I think. It’s the last thought I have before I fall asleep, the fire crackling in the background.
Chapter 23
When I wake up in my bed, I know Andy must have carried me here the night before.
I half expect him to be lying there with me, but when my arm reaches for him there’s nothing but pillows.
I crack open my eyes. There on my nightstand is a piece of paper. It’s folded in two so that it stands like a tent. The side facing me has my name written on it with a heart. I reach out and grab the note.
Ella,
This isn’t a paper heart but a promise that I’m going to come back with the best diner to-go food you’ve ever had.
I love you,
Andy
I can’t help but smile at how thoughtful Andy is. I put the letter carefully back on the nightstand—I’ll definitely be keeping this for my secret hiding place. As I do, I realize that Andy has put my phone next to me as well, charging in the outlet by my bed. It’s another thoughtful gesture, but I immediately feel a moment of dread seeing my phone as reality sets in. All of the memories from the school dance are coming back without Andy here to distract me.
I reluctantly grab my phone and see a bunch more missed calls and texts.
I scan through to the text from my sister.
Told Mom and Dad that you’re at Katie’s. Please tell me you’re safe.
Ella…
I feel a surge of guilt and immediately text her that I’m fine. Then I add more.
In fact, I’m more than fine. SO much to tell you later. ILY.
I don’t want to read any of the texts from my friends, especially from Carmen, but I don’t have to click on her message to see what it says.
Andy isn’t who he says he is. I’m trying to protect you.
I roll my eyes. Really? Now, after everything she said to me last night, she’s going to try to say that about Andy? I’m so heated that I put my phone down. She has some nerve.
But it’s my anger at her that reminds me of why I’m really here in the first place. Not for a romantic getaway with Andy—but to find the last paper heart. If I know one thing about planning, it’s that you always save the best for last.
I begin roaming the house, searching for anything that can be opened with a key. If I’d been focused on the paper hearts yesterday, I would’ve been alarmed when I entered the house and there was nothing screaming out at me that said open me.
I really hope I didn’t read the last paper heart wrong.
I shake my head. It has to mean here.
Moving quickly from room to room, I try everything that has a keyhole with my lanyard in hand. The first room I try is my parents’, since I’m pretty convinced it has been my mom sending me these paper hearts.
There’s a lockbox in the closet where emergency cash is stored. I only know this because it’s also where my mom keeps her wedding rings when we go out on the ski slopes.
But as I try to put my key into the opening, it doesn’t fit.
I keep trying to jam it in, growing more frustrated each time, until I admit defeat. What else could have a key in this room? I check the rest of the closet and there’s nothing but snow boots and jackets. I move to the drawers on the other end of the room and sift through leggings and sweaters, to find absolutely nothing.
Where else would my mom keep something? Maybe the kitchen. She keeps her recipes in a little box next to the stove. I’ve seen it hundreds of times, but I don’t recall a lock. I make my way to see it. There’s a fake lock on the side of it that dangles like a charm. I search the rest of the cabinets and then the pantry. Nothing.
I let out a deep sigh. Maybe Carmen wasn’t even right about the clue, like she wasn’t right about anything this past year.
I go back to the living room, where I fell asleep in Andy’s arms last night. Maybe I was too distracted to see something? I scan the shelf above the fireplace that we stream with a garland around the holidays. Now there are only our family photos. I check behind each frame and find nothing but dust.
Come on, Mom, I think, because I’m in the completely wrong place…unless the last paper heart is in Ashley’s room….
I run back upstairs to Ashley’s room, which is adjacent to mine. Like at home, our rooms are complete opposites. Instead of keeping a calendar on her desk, she uses it as another space for a pile of clothes. Posters of her favorite bands cover every inch of the walls. Her bed is made, but only because my mom must have done it for her.
But then there—I see it. Square in the middle of her bed is a watercolored box with gold latches. It’s vintage looking, in the shape of an old suitcase.
No, it can’t be, I think.
I move swiftly toward the bed and bring the key to the box. My chest tightens as the key goes into the hole seamlessly. Then I turn it. With a soft click, the box opens.
There’s a paper heart on top. My last letter.
Ashley? I think in amazement. Ashley has been writing me these paper hearts?
I feel my eyes start to well up. All this time I thought she was too cool for school to write me one paper heart, let alone eleven. What made her do it?
I was about to find out.
But as soon as I remove the last paper heart, my eyes move quickly to the Polaroid photo behind it. I recognize the setting immediately. Belvedere Castle. My eyes blink rapidly at the people in the center of the photo.
It’s me, standing with Andy.
I reach into the box and flip over the photo.
Me and Drew 2/8
Drew? Who is Drew? This is Andy. My Andy. The Andy I fell in love with, who I met at the library…but no. This photo was clearly taken before then. We knew each other before the accident? I’m instantly hit with a wave of sickness. First my friends, now Andy. I don’t know who to trust or believe anymore.
Suddenly, I remember the text from Carmen. Andy isn’t who he says he is. I’m trying to protect you.
It’s all I can think about now, and my head starts spinning as I burst into tears. Soon the tears turn to sobs. There’s no point wiping them away at this point. They roll down my cheeks like waterfalls. I’m overwhelmed with emotion.
Suddenly, I hear a cheerful voice behind me.
“I’m back!”