I turn and there’s Andy—or is it Drew—holding a bag with breakfast. He instantly spots the tears. His eyes dart from me to the picture I’m holding.
He takes a step toward me as I take a step back, my face still wet with tears.
“Let me explain.”
Chapter 24
“Explain what?!” I cry. “That you knew me before the accident? Or that your name isn’t even Andy? ”
“Calm down, Ella,” he says.
“Calm down! Don’t tell me to calm down. I trusted you.”
“You still can,” he says, moving to sit on the bed. He looks at the spot next to him. “Can you please read the letter?”
“What can it possibly say that will make a difference?” I ask, still crying.
“Everything,” he says.
Reluctantly, I move to sit next to him on the bed. I look at the box in my hands instead of him. I’m breathing fast as I move the key toward the latch again. When I open it this time, I pull out the paper heart. This one is not just a cutout, it’s a long letter that I carefully unfold to read.
Dear Ella,
You must have guessed it by now, but yes, your secret admirer is me. Ashley. I’ve always been your admirer, really. You’re the kind of sister that makes everything tough because I’m constantly trying to live up to your impossible standards. Maybe that’s why sometimes I take it out on you.
But this isn’t about me—this is about you. For a long time, I’ve been hoping, like you, that you’d fully recover and get your memory back. When it wasn’t happening, I thought that I should take matters into my own hands and help guide you, like you have helped guide me throughout life as my big sister.
But I needed help. So I enlisted Drew. He told me everywhere the two of you went in the eleven weeks you forgot—the places where the two of you first fell in love. I can see it in your face now that you’re falling in love again.
We steered you to the library so you could meet him again. He started working there with Sarah after the accident. I know it may be hard to believe, but Sarah was your closest friend during the time of the accident. In a way, he said seeing Sarah helped him stay close to you, even though you had completely forgotten who he was. Sarah too. He said his name was Andy in case it threw any of our plans off. His full name is Andrew. You actually met last year when his family moved to town. But please don’t be mad at him. He was only trying to help you.
I think on some level the reason losing eleven weeks of your memory was so painful is because your heart didn’t want you to forget. It knew you had a love out there waiting for you.
The night of the accident, you left the dance early because you and Drew were sneaking off to our mountain house for a romantic night. I only knew where you were going because I had to keep up your cover story, that you were sleeping at Carmen’s. Mom and Dad weren’t aware that you weren’t speaking then. When I got the call from the hospital, I became racked with guilt over what I knew. But looking back, there’s no way I would’ve tried to stop you. You were too in love. What kind of sister would I have been to get in the middle of that? And what kind of sister would I be to let you forget about it all?
I’ll let Drew explain his side of the story. I’ve been watching and I know you might have forgotten how to follow your heart, but trust it now.
Love, Your Admirer,
Ashley
P.S. I’ve always known about your secret hiding spot.
I read the letter with my mouth open. Ashley has been trying to get me to remember Andy?
He clears his throat now. “Are you ready for my side of the story?”
I nod, still processing the letter.
“I know what you must be thinking. If we loved each other so much, why didn’t I come find you?”
As I begin nervously folding the paper back into a heart, he continues. “But the thing is, I wasn’t sure you’d even believe me. Love is something you feel. Not something you’re told. I knew you fell in love with me once, so I was confident you would again. Then Ashley approached me with the idea of the paper hearts, and…I knew it was crazy, but I would do crazier things to get you back. Do you…do you remember anything…anything at all?”
He moves his hands over to mine. I flinch as our skin touches but he keeps his hand on mine as my breathing gets louder.
Do I remember anything?
“The flower shop?” I ask, recalling my first paper heart that led me to Clover and Gold.
“That’s where we first met. You were ordering flowers for the Valentine’s Day Dance. I was in the store getting flowers for my mom. When I saw you, I thought this is a girl who knows what she wants. I bought you a rose on the spot and got your number.”
“I kept that rose,” I say. He nods.
“The bridge?” I ask next. “Was that our first date?”
His eyes light up and he nods again.
“Then ice-skating?” I ask.
He smiles. “You’re getting the idea.”
“What about the spa?”
He laughs. “That’s the only one we didn’t do together. Ashley thought it would help you remember the dance.”
“It didn’t,” I say bluntly.
He frowns. “I know. We also thought you were going to invite either her or me to the chocolate-making class. You threw us for a loop on that one.”
Watching my eyes move back toward the Polaroid of us at Belvedere Castle, he grabs it. “And this,” he adds, “is the day we first said ‘I love you.’ ”
I look at the photo in front of me, remembering the one in my secret spot. I look so happy.
“Did we say I love you before this picture was taken?”
He shakes his head. “No, it was at the Whispering Gallery.”
My heart drops. This is romantic, I tell myself. He was trying to re-create your dates.
But then why wasn’t I happy? Maybe because I don’t remember saying I love you to Andy at the Whispering Gallery. I remember saying it last night.
“It was all planned,” I say now. There’s a sadness in my voice.
“I thought you were going to be happy,” he said. He lowers his head. “All this time, I wanted you to remember, but above all I just wanted you to be happy like we were last night.”