“Since Tuesday when I found it in your lock—”
“So you stole from me too? Great. How am I supposed to ever trust you again, Carmen?”
She looks down at her heels. “I don’t know.”
All I can do is shake my head. Here she is again, playing the victim. I find the right key on the key chain and start opening the door.
“Wait, Ellie. Please. You’re right. I’ve been a bad friend. I should’ve told you about Pete, but I…I was so hurt that you were becoming better friends with Sarah than me. It felt like you just left me…and I was crushed. The kiss didn’t mean anything. I felt so guilty, but that’s why me and Pete agreed not to tell you.”
I blink. That must be why Pete didn’t want to get back together with me last year. He felt guilty too.
“I always thought that you and Pete should be together, so I just wanted to forget about it,” Carmen continues. Then she lets out a sigh. “I just thought I’d never get you back if you knew.”
There’s a look in her eyes I’ve never seen before but I’m so mad at her, I don’t care what it is and turn away. How am I ever supposed to forgive her for what she has done? She’s apologizing a year too late.
I open the door and slide in. Before I can shut the door, she comes up next to me.
“It’s the Catskills.”
I look up at her pleading eyes.
“What?”
“The clue on your paper heart. It’s your Catskills house—I’ve been thinking about it all week.”
I nod but can’t bring myself to thank her now. Maybe not ever.
I shut the car door and start the engine. I’m not thinking about the fact that I haven’t been able to drive for a year, or that each time I’ve tried I feel like I’m back in the hospital again, gasping for air. All I know is I need to get away, so that’s what I do, not even looking at Carmen in the rearview mirror.
* * *
They say driving is like riding a bike. I never believed it until I was behind the wheel, driving by muscle memory.
Before I know it, I’m parked outside the library on another Friday night.
I strap my heels back on before getting out of the car. When I do, Andy sees me through the window. In seconds he rushes outside and soon his hands are on my face as he looks at the car, then back at me.
“Is everything okay? Did you drive here yourself? Why did you leave the dance?”
I hug him, and as I bury my face in his chest, I can feel his heart racing. But the smell of his cologne calms me.
“I’m fine,” I say. “Well, sort of. Can I tell you in the car? We have a long trip ahead of us.”
“Trip?” he asks, pulling back to see my face.
I nod. “I need to find my last paper heart.”
“Tonight? What about your dance?”
“I can’t wait any longer,” I say.
This time Andy nods before wrapping his arms around me, his heart still beating fast.
Chapter 22
I’ve never gone to my family’s mountain house with a boy before.
We mainly go in the winter as a family. My parents, Ashley, and I like to go skiing. I’ve always preferred the time we spend together post skiing—sitting by the fire with hot chocolate in hand or relaxing in the hot tub outside. In the summers we make use of our second home too. There’s plenty of hiking around the Catskills. Ashley and I have gone to a few concerts at Woodstock. Two summers ago, I was able to invite my friends. Carmen, Jess, and I wore matching jean shorts and neon T-shirts that had Sunshine & Song lyrics printed on them. There’s a framed picture in my bedroom from the concert where Carmen’s on top of my shoulders. But I push this thought out of my head. I can’t even think about her right now.
Once she’s no longer in sight, I open the paper heart she had stolen from me. It says, The key to second chances is where your heart is. She was right about the Catskills, but what she didn’t know about was the bronze key I’ve kept on my lanyard. I had a feeling “the key” meant I was finally going to figure out what it opened.
I’m quiet for the majority of the car ride. Andy volunteers to drive but I insist on being the one behind the wheel. For some reason, it feels like this is something that I have to do.
So I drive for an hour and a half to the mountain house, trying to think about anything besides my traitor best friends. Each one of them calls. Every time the phone rings, the music from my phone stops playing and my ringtone blasts into the car. My phone’s on the console so I can follow the GPS as I’m driving. The fourth call is from Katie. As the phone rings, I ignore it like I’ve ignored the others, but I can feel Andy staring at me.
“Are you going to get that?” he asks.
“No.”
“So are you going to tell me what happened? Is this trip because my spontaneity is rubbing off on you, or does this spur-of-the-moment getaway have something to do with”—he pauses, reading the name on my phone—“Katie?”
“Both,” I answer honestly, keeping my eyes on the road. “And I’ll tell you. Just not tonight.”
“Okay, I can wait for the drama. Until then I’ll pretend you just wanted to whisk me away instead of having other boys asking you to dance all night.”
“Sounding jealous over there. But for your information, no boys asked me to dance.”
“Maybe because you left after ten minutes. But have you seen yourself tonight? I meant what I said. You look beautiful.”
“Oh, in this old thing?” I laugh. I’m still in my dress, while Andy’s in regular pants and a T-shirt. “Well, I’ll be changing into my bathing suit once we get there.”
“Um. Ella. I know you’re having a crisis of some sort with your friends, but you do realize it’s the dead of winter.”
I laugh. “There’s a hot tub.”
“Hot tub!” he yells. “I can get used to this new and spontaneous Ella.”
“Me too,” I say as my cheeks turn warm, and not just from the heat blasting.
* * *
When we get to the house, the last thing I’m thinking about is the next paper heart. It’s ironic, considering that’s all I’ve been thinking about for the last few weeks. That’s why I’m here to begin with.
But being alone with Andy—really alone—has made me focus solely on him. Maybe it’s because the second we park in the driveway Andy hops out of the car and opens my door for me. Before he walks me to the house, he twirls me once under the moon and whispers in my ear that it’s because I deserve at least one spin tonight when I look this good. Then he dips me like he did for our first kiss. When he does, all the tension built up from the car ride releases. It’s like he sucks all the negative out of me. Here I am at my favorite place with my favorite person, and the funny part is that I didn’t plan this—but here we are.