“Stop thinking about it, or you will never get through this. Come on, girlie, I’ve got you.” She wraps her arm around my shoulders and pulls open the door.
We can’t move, due to the wall of guys standing in the way. They look down at me, but I can’t meet their eyes. A better person would have cut them loose before now, a weaker person would have held on tight and lived in the moment for the past three days, I guess I’m neither.
“Not now, guys, she’s been through enough.” D’s voice is soft, as she steps slightly in front of me.
“We’re worried about her, we just wanted to make sure she was okay.” Sin’s voice cuts me to the bone, and I have to stop myself from reaching for him.
“You’ll see her soon enough, please. You’ll understand soon.” They walk away before she adds, “just not as soon as you think.”
The graduating Academy girls are announced in descending order, and I can barely hear a word. I look over at Four, and she gives me a soft smile.
“I just wanted to say thank you. I couldn’t have done this without you and honestly, you have been such a big help, so thanks.” I kinda feel like I’m rambling but her smile doesn’t lessen at all.
“Don’t mention it, lovely. I was happy to help.”
“Still, you went above and beyond. I don’t think I would have got my head around everything without you.” I’m surprised I can even vocalize my thoughts with how jumbled my head is, but I think I’m pulling it off.
“Of course, it’s what I do.” With one last smile she looks back to the girls, women, being called forth.
She really is a lovely girl, and I know she’s going to make a fantastic teacher someday.
By the time Caitlyn is called, I’m ready to leave. I’m itching out of my skin, and I need to be outside. I never felt claustrophobic before, but I do now. I’m not sure why.
Sam steps forward, and I look to D, she looks as confused as I do.
“This isn’t the traditional way to do this, Academy wise, but you deserve better. I haven’t been the best guy for you, but you make me want to be. Caitlyn, will you marry me?” He drops down on one knee, as he pulls out a ring. My hand flies to my mouth as I watch the scene unfold.
She’s utterly slack jawed as she peers down at him in wonder, before nodding her head. He whoops before swinging her around in his arms, and placing the ring on her hand. She doesn’t come back to our seats, but we’ll be seeing her soon enough, and now we’ll have something to celebrate.
The numbers continue until it’s D’s turn. She walks up there with her head held high, regal, and stunning. She could rule the world if she wanted to, and at least she would do it fairly. Jake moves to step forward, and she holds her hand out, as gasps hit the air.
“Don’t you dare, Jake, unless you’re planning to carry me off this stage because my feet are already aching. You are not proposing to me.” She pops her hip, and his cheeks heat, before he steps back.
I look at my guys, although I can’t really call them that anymore. Standing there, waiting for me to stand up and graduate. I know Emmet is going to propose, but maybe he won’t now that his dad is gone. I hope he doesn’t.
“Luna Carter, congratulations,” Miss Lucien calls, as I stand up, and make my way to where everyone stood before me.
She hands me a check, which can’t be cashed. I already know that they’ve opened a bank account in my name, and put all the funds in there, but this is for show. I accept it with a weak smile, as Emmet and Aeron step forward.
I blink my eyes slowly and they both drop down on one knee, and pull out a ring.
“We both want to issue a proposal,” Emmet says, swallowing hard, as his Adam’s apple bobbles furiously. “Who’s do you accept?”
Well, who ever said romance was dead?
I can’t bring myself to smile, or even move. My mouth opens, as I swipe my tongue across my dry lips, and inhale some much needed air.
“Neither, I will never be a Harkwrigh.,” I run and I don’t look back. My heels are abandoned on the stage as I fly out the doors, and I don’t stop until I make it inside the maze, and all I can do is wait.
It only takes five minutes for him to arrive, his eyes travel over me coldly, before he walks closer. He tilts my chin up with his fingers, and brushes his lips across mine.
“Did you say no because of me?”
“I said no because I can’t do this right now. I wrote you all a letter, could you give it to them, please? Tell them not to open it until they’re ready, and hopefully, they’ll know when the right time comes.” I push the letter into his hands, and he slides them into his pocket, all but one.
“Yours too,” I say with a frown.
“I’m ready now.” He sits down beside me and opens the envelope, but I stop his hand with my own.
“You don’t know what I say in that letter. You don’t know what I ask you for. Please, wait.” I wish he would listen to me, but I know he won’t.
“Luna, I am ready. I don’t need to know what this letter says, to know that. I’m hoping this is your way of saying that this isn’t a goodbye. More of a see you soon. If that’s the case, then I don’t want to wait, because the idea of never seeing you again, makes me want to tear shit up.” He laughs loud, but it’s a caustic sound. I let go of his hand.
“When you no longer feel angry with me for choosing this way out, and you feel as though you could handle whatever version of me wrote that letter, then open it. I hope this isn’t goodbye, because I’m selfish enough to never want to let you go.” I get up, and he grabs my wrist.
“Please, Aeron, just let me go.” I don’t sound convincing enough, because I don’t want to be away from any of them, but I’m damaged. I need to fix myself, before I can handle them.
“I didn’t see a letter in there for Tucker,” he says softly, his husky voice soothing my nerves.
“Someone else is giving that to him. I already knew he wouldn’t be here. I’m sorry I couldn’t say yes, Sin, but please don’t ever doubt how much I love you. The love I feel will never go away, and I will never stop,” I annunciate those last four words carefully.
He trails his fingers over my face, and my eyes flutter against my will. It takes all of my self control not to lean into him, ask him to take me away, and never let me run. I can’t though, I can’t give myself in that way, not until I find a way to heal the damage that has been done.
His mouth meets mine, whisper soft, a kiss that is barely there, but yet, I feel as though I will never stop feeling it on my lips.
“Goodbye, Luna Carter. You were the best part of this whole place.” He smiles sadly before he walks away.
He may not have been the person I came here to meet, but I am glad he found me, even if it hurt.
A cough breaks the silence, and I look towards the exit, a small smile spreads across my face as I make my way over to him, and we don’t look back once as he leads me to a car, and gets me the hell out of there.
“Seeing my mom was harder than I thought it would be, but I’m glad I did it before I left,” I say as I chew on the inside of my bottom lip.