“I’m here if you ever need to vent, Aer. Unlike your mom, I won’t use your secrets against you.” I pat him on the shoulder before I walk away. Damn, the power of a good woman.
I search until I find Tom in the game room. Luckily, he’s alone. Exactly how I need him to be.
I drop down on the seat across from him, before I pick up the crystal ashtray beside me and throw it at the wall.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?”
“As if you care. Didn’t you stop giving a shit about what’s bothering me long ago?” I bite out. I mean, I have to make this convincing.
“Are you ever going to let this go? So what if she slept with me first, it isn’t as though you didn’t get to have her as well,” he says flippantly, and it doesn’t make my blood boil. That’s… surprising.
“You knew how much Rachel meant to me, that I wasn’t even looking at another girl because of her. Yet, you still made your move, how could you do that?” I should have asked him this calmly years ago, maybe I’ll finally get an answer out of him.
“I thought it was just another one of your phases, you went through girls faster than… well, than a whore goes through guys in a week. I didn’t know it was going to hurt you that badly, and I thought we moved on from that. Is that why you’ve hated me for this long?” He looks bored, unshaded. Fucking psycho.
“What about Tucker?”
“What about him?” he growls out, his eyes flash and I know I’m starting to get to him now. Better change tactics before I push him too far.
“Forget it, yet again, you’ve managed to turn this about you. I didn’t even come here to argue with you,” I shout and he stands up.
“What’s wrong?”
“My mother, as usual. I’m sick of it, and you know what, I’m not doing it anymore. I know we’re not friends anymore, but I still think I can trust you. Am I wrong, Tom?” I stare up at him and his eyes soften as he shakes his head.
“Of course not, I’d never betray you, Aer. I promise.” He places his hand on my shoulder and I look down at my hands.
“When we graduate, I’m leaving. I’m taking my trust fund the moment it clears and I’m blowing this whole fucking place and this family. I can’t tell anyone because if Sir finds out, I know he’ll find a way to stop me, but I don’t want to be an accountant. I want to live for myself. I won’t ever come back, and the next time you see my face, it will be for something I did. Either starting a band or landing a gig in a film. I don’t know, but I know I’m done with all the drama that comes with the Harkwright name.” I dig my hands into the arms of the chair and he tightens his grip on my shoulder.
“It’s alright, brother, I won’t tell anyone. Just be careful that you don’t tell anyone else, okay?”hHe meets my eyes, and it’s time to hammer in the final nail.
“Bit late for that, but I trust the other two. They won’t say anything.” He smiles at me and nothing else of substance is said.
I haven’t tested Emmet, for two reasons. One, I know it isn’t him and two, I can’t figure out how to do it. Here’s hoping my instincts are right, and I haven’t left myself open to his betrayal.
One more day until the wedding and Sir hasn’t called me into his office or given me a beating yet.
Maybe I was wrong about the guys, but if nothing happens, then I’ll think up some other horseshit and test the others. Although, all this lying bullshit is tiring, maybe I should just forget about it and focus my efforts on the strangler. Not that I can do much on that front. Darius is monitoring our movements and nothing untoward has happened with Sir setting up shop in the Academy. Hopefully, he’ll fuck off and leave us to it soon, not that I want anyone else to die, but I don’t want them to get away with it either. Necessary casualty, does that make me a callous bastard? Probably, but the angel on my shoulder is banned from speaking to me. Fucking Thallon.
I guess it doesn’t matter that I realized I loved Luna too late now, seeing as Sir would have ended my claim either way. I could have handled it a lot better though. Then again, I could say that about most of the choices I’ve made.
Right, Friday. Another day of math and accountanting, yay my fucking life. I may have been lying to Tom about what I’m going to do, or at least, it started out that way. All I wanted was to free myself from my mother, but now? I think I do want to be done with it all. I just don’t know what I will do with myself if I don’t live the life that has been mapped out for me since before I was even born.
I walk out of my room to see Luna following behind Thallon. She glanced over her shoulder at me and a shy smile graces her lips. Before her lips turn down at the corners and she turns back around to face his back. Her face doesn’t look as bruised now, not that Twenty got off that lucky. She really did ruin that girl. Who knew she had it in her?
Fuck it, the mess hall can wait. I don’t need to see him humiliate her anymore. It doesn’t matter that she’s allowed to eat with Daria now, he’ll still only let her have what he approves of. Fucking porridge, as if she’d ever choose that willingly. My girl loves French toast and pancakes, not oats and hot milk.
I roll my shoulder and crane my neck, as I try to get rid of the tension building inside me. On second thought, I think I’ll go to the gym. There’s a punch bag hanging there, calling my name.
21
What A Beautiful Day
Luna
I have the garment bag that Thallon thrust at me a couple of hours ago hanging over my arm, and the dress I picked out for the reception safely tucked away in my overnight bag. I’m far from excited about tomorrow, but I’m hoping Thallon won’t do anything too cruel with so many people around. I know people think that Sir is protecting me, but I know they’re wrong. I don’t know why he stepped in that day, but I can’t see him doing it again.
I wish we could leave tomorrow and come back on the same day, but Thallon doesn’t want to risk getting there late and he’s more than happy to make me uncomfortable for a night or two.
I wouldn’t mind if I was going with one of the others, but not him. Even if he has been a little different since the fight. Not nicer, just indifferent towards me.
“Come on, Little Mouse. Let’s go.” He hammers against my door and I let out a bone weary sigh as I grab my bag and pull my door open.
“Seriously? Still trying to hold onto the act that you’re meek, innocent, and don’t want more than you deserve?” He rolls his eyes and I step past him. It’s safer just to bite my tongue, hopefully, he’ll busy himself with music or his phone. I think silence will be blissful in this instance.
We walk to the car and climb in, but he doesn’t pull his phone out. Instead, he stares at me, and it’s unnerving to say the least.
“Aren’t you tired of pretending?”
“I’m not pretending,” I sigh and he scowls before shaking his head.
“I see who you really are, Little Mouse. You'll falter soon enough.”
I don’t know what he thinks he sees, but he’s wrong. Isn’t he?