“Who? No one is ever over there,” Evan disputes, and Owen glares.
“Not now, but when we lived at home.”
“With our parents?”
Dart is basically beet red, he is laughing so hard, but Nico shakes his head. “I think there is a song. Something like ‘Can’t turn a hoe into a housewife’?”
I look at my best friend as everyone gawks at him, and I have to control the urge to rip his head off. “I will fucking kill you if you ever say something like that again.”
Nico automatically throws up his hands in defense. “Bro, my bad. I didn’t think that through. I don’t mean that. Jaylin is not a hoe.”
“I know. But please listen to me right now—I will not let you disrespect her like that. Or me. I don’t care if I love you as a brother. You will not do that.”
He nods. “I apologize. That was uncalled-for.” The anger inside me recedes as he holds my gaze. I know he didn’t mean it. He doesn’t think sometimes, just speaks. “Honestly, with Jaylin, she’s always been by herself. She’s never had to depend on anyone. I may have doubted her in the beginning, but I know more now. She’s in it with you. She’ll get over that.”
I can tell no one else knows what to say, or else they’re worried I’ll snap at them if they say something I don’t like. From beside me, Evan suggests, “Maybe she doesn’t like being in someone else’s space. What if instead of asking her to share your bed, you guys get a bed together?”
“I suggested that, but apparently moving in together scares her,” I say, and he nods as Dart looks at me.
“Wait, you two aren’t banging?”
I give him a dry look. “That’s not a problem, dude. It’s the sharing a space with a man she’s struggling with.”
He doesn’t understand. “Shit, girls never want to leave my bed.”
“Me either,” Owen adds. “But then, I’ve never met anyone like Jaylin.”
They both nod. “That’s the truth,” Dart admits.
Chandler clears his throat, and I meet his gaze. “I second what Evan says. If she doesn’t want to share your bed, offer to buy another—”
“Guys, it’s not that,” I say slowly. “She had something happen when she was younger that makes it hard for her to sleep in a man’s space.”
They all nod, and I don’t know if they know what I’m implying, but no one asks me to elaborate. Instead, Nico says, “Then make it easier.”
“What?”
“Hear me out. Aviva came at me with every reason under the sun not to have a huge house, and I made sure that every single one of her concerns was eased. If Jaylin gets scared, talk to her. If she wants to leave, go with her—”
“That’s going to be hard when they have Celeste. They can’t be dragging her out of bed,” Owen objects, and I’m surprised for a minute, but the kid is good with kids.
Nico nods. “True. So maybe have Jean stay over more. Talk it over with Jaylin, see if it’s something she’d be down for. Have her make a list of her fears and fix them all.”
I think that over. It’s actually not an awful plan. I need her to be honest with me, really explain what is going on, and then I need to do exactly what Nico is saying. List it out and let me ease each concern. I’m home for the next week, so we can fix this in that time if we work on it. I know it can, and then we can move even further forward. I guess I can forgive Nico for his poor choice of words earlier.
As I bring my phone out of my pocket, I throw down my Sharpie to text Jaylin.
Me: I need you to do something for me.
As I wait for her to write me back, I sign a few more pucks. When her response comes through, I look down to read it.
Jaylin: I’m really not in the mood for a blow job today. My jaw still hurts from the last one.
I snort, drawing the attention of my friends. Beside me, Evan is strumming the guitar, humming as he waits for us to rotate.
“You play?”
He nods. “I come from a musical family.”
“Can you sing too? Isn’t your sister a singer?”
“She is,” Owen says with a nod. “And yeah, he can.”
I hold his gaze. “I may need your services.”
Before he can protest or tell me differently, I write Jaylin back.
Me: Sorry, not sorry my cock is so big. You don’t seem to mind when it’s inside you.
Jaylin: You are not wrong, Mr. Litman.
I grin as I type back quickly.
Me: Seriously, though. I need you to make me a list of the reasons you won’t sleep at my house.
Jaylin: Why?
Me: ’Cause I need to know. I want to help you with this.
Jaylin: Kirby, this is my issue.
Me: Okay, but I want to make it ours. Let me help.
Jaylin: Okay.
Me: You’ll make the list?
Jaylin: Yes.
Me: Fantastic. I love you, and I’ll see you after the game.
Jaylin: I love you, and you better win. My dad is excited.
Me: Done deal, sweetheart. Have a good night.
Jaylin: You too.
I close out my messages on my phone to see my wallpaper. It’s a picture of Celeste and Jaylin laughing on the beach. I am so confident in this new plan. I can’t be sure it’ll work or even if she wants it to work, but I’m going to do my best to help her beat this. We need to so we can fully commit. I refuse to allow something like this to keep us from enjoying our forever. Because that’s exactly what is in our grasp, a loving forever, and I won’t enjoy my life without her in it.
And in my bed.
Or in our bed.
Any bed as long as we’re in it together.
Chapter Thirty
Kirby
* * *
As our starting goalie, Nico is the first to hit the ice.
I tap my gloves to Chandler’s and then Evan’s before I skate onto the ice for warm-ups. Our first home game. When my skates hit the ice, I dig into it, kicking up my heart rate up to get the warm-up I need to be successful. Man, I love our ice. I wait for everyone to get onto the rink before I swing my arm into the pyramid of pucks, knocking them to the ice for us to warm up with. I fall into the circle we’re making around the goal get started. The crowd is roaring, excited for a new season and, basically, a whole new group of guys. We did okay in the preseason, nothing to shake a stick at, but okay. None of that matters, though. Now it’s the regular season. We lost our first two games, but it’s time for a win, and one on home ice will make it even sweeter.
As I pass my teammates, I smack their shins with my stick, something I always do before each game. I weave between everyone, stretching my spine by turning my torso back and forth. I don’t allow myself to look out into the crowd yet. I need to do my regular warm-up before I get distracted by Celeste and Jaylin. I know they’re here; I can feel them. Or I’m just really excited that they’re here and are going to watch me.
I drop to the ice, stretching my legs out and open before bringing them all the way back to go into upward dog. Evan drops beside me, doing the same pose as he lets out a long breath.
“Are we sold out?”
I nod, still not looking at the crowd. “Yup. Should be a loud game.”