In that moment, Drake knew exactly what he wanted, but it was also exactly what he could never have. She had been through hell, and he was a monster for thinking such thoughts. “You should leave now,” he stated matter-of-factly, jerking his gaze upward and focusing it on something on the other side of the room as he slowly disentangled himself from her embrace. “It is getting late.” Quick steps carried him to the other side of the room as he tried to escape that overwhelming pull she seemed to have on him.
“What happened to your father?” Leonora asked, the tone in her voice suggesting that she would not simply drop the subject no matter what he did.
Swallowing, Drake turned around to face her once more, determined to be bold and perhaps shock her into leaving. “I killed him.”
As expected, her jaw dropped, and her eyes grew round. Surprisingly, she did not immediately flee his presence, but instead moved toward him once more. “You killed him?” Her eyes searched his face, a question there that needed no words.
“After I found my mother’s diaries,” Drake explained, remembering the anger and outrage that had driven him that day, “I confronted him.” A dark chuckle left his lips, and he felt the sudden urge to drive his fist through the wall. “He did not even deny it. In his mind, he had done nothing wrong. She had been his wife, and he had acted within his rights.”
Fresh tears appeared in Leonora’s eyes, and Drake cursed himself for putting them there. “I never knew people like that actually existed,” she whispered, choked sobs rising from her throat. “I’m so very sorry.”
Drake gritted his teeth, once more stepping around her, needing space between them to say what needed to be said. “So, I called him out. At first, he laughed at me, but soon he knew that I meant every word.” He turned around to look at her once more, his gaze tracing the lines her tears were leaving upon her cheeks. “Ultimately, he agreed to meet me at dawn. I’m not certain if he believed it to be a farce, if he thought I would fire wide and the issue would be settled. It doesn’t matter what he believed.” He took a step closer, his eyes finding hers, holding on. “In the end, I put a bullet between his eyes.”
Leonora blinked as though his words needed another moment to reach her mind, to make themselves heard. Then, she all but rocked backwards as though a shockwave had hit her. She stared up at him, unblinking, her face suddenly white as a sheet. No doubt, she remembered his first words to her, urging her to confide in him, to give a name so he could go out and avenge what had been done to her. “You meant it,” Leonora finally whispered in a voice that was far from steady. “You meant what you said. I never thought…”
“Of course, I meant it,” Drake assured her, needing her to know that he always meant what he said. He was a man of his word; that at least was something to count in his favor.
Still staring at him, Leonora shook her head in bewilderment. “If you…” She swallowed hard, then once more shook her head before she spoke again. “If you discover his identity, you will call him out? You will…” Shock robbed her of words, and yet, her eyes were as expressive as always.
Holding her gaze, Drake took a step closer, needing her to hear him. “As soon as I know who attacked you, I will end him. I promised you I would, and I always keep my word.”
Her eyes widened even more, and her head moved from side to side with more vehemence than before. “No! You cannot! You cannot do that!” Her features hardened, and something determined appeared in her gaze. “I will not allow you to do that!”
Drake regarded her, puzzled by her reaction. “Why would you defend him? He deserves to die for what he did. Why would you seek to protect him?”
“I am not,” Leonora exclaimed, suddenly surging forward once more grasping him by the lapels. She gave him a slight shake, the look in her eyes hardening as she looked up into his. “The only one I’m protecting here is you. You cannot expect to go through life, putting yourself in danger time and time again, and come out unscathed. One of these days, a bullet will find you and then…” A choked sob escaped her lips, and fresh tears shot to her eyes. “I cannot lose you.”
Drake almost rocked back on his heels upon hearing those words.
So did Leonora.
Her eyes went wide, and she clasped her hands over her mouth in shock. For a brief moment, she seemed paralyzed, unable to move. Then, however, she began to back away, her feet carrying her closer to the door and away from him, before she suddenly spun around and fled, leaving behind her cloak in her haste to get away from him.
Drake simply stood there, staring after her, completely at a loss. He could not deny that hearing her say these words meant something to him. Yet, the realization that at least a part of her cared for him had clearly come as a surprise to Leonora.
A surprise she obviously did not care for.
Chapter Twenty-Two
What the Heart Wants
Tears still blurred her vision as Leonora fled from Drake’s townhouse. Almost blindly, she stumbled onward, out into the garden and toward the hedge and the gap within. She crossed over, pushing branches aside, feeling the cool spring air brush against her heated cheeks. Somewhere in the back of her head, Leonora realized that she had left her cloak behind. Only in that moment, she could not even bring herself to contemplate the idea of returning for it. Her heart beat fast, and her breath came in pants as she struggled onward toward the house. Trembling fingers closed around the door handle, and she all but fell inside as the door swung open.
Never before had Leonora found herself so shaken. Not since that night at the masquerade. Yet, she could not even say what it was that had stunned, confused, upset her so.
I cannot lose you.
Indeed, the words she had spoken had been nothing but the truth. Still, it was a truth she had until this very moment not realized herself. Of course, she had known that she had come to care for Drake, for Lord Pemberton. They had grown closer over the past few weeks. Quite frankly, he was the one person these days who knew her best. He knew things she had never spoken to anyone else about. He had seen her in her darkest moments. He knew her fears and her hopes. He knew everything.
Almost.
Indeed, she had never told him how much his help, his friendship had come to mean to her. She had never told him that she found herself looking forward to the moment she could step through that gap in the hedge and see him again. She had never told him that when he pulled her into his arms, imitating an attack, giving her the chance to fight to free herself, she felt all but reluctant to do so. She had never told him that his embrace had come to feel…pleasant.
Enchanting.
Tempting.
Hugging her arms around herself, Leonora rushed onward into the hall and toward the stairs. She needed to be alone with her thoughts, worried that she might stumble upon someone who would inquire after her agitated state. In that moment, Leonora could not imagine answering—
Leonora froze when she made to step through the doorway and found her path blocked by one of her sisters.
Christina stood there, momentarily taken aback by Leonora’s sudden appearance. Then, however, her gaze cleared and swept over her sister. “Where you outside? Without a cloak?” She frowned. “You’re shivering. Are you cold?” She stepped forward, and her hand settled upon Leonora’s shoulders. “What happened? Is something wrong?”