We can’t get close enough.
Can’t stop to breathe.
Can’t stop touching and tugging, until somehow, I’ve maneuvered her against the wall.
“Axel,” she gasps as I leverage the position, pulling her knee up my side and rocking into her.
I don’t know what’s better, the heated friction between us or the needy way she says my name.
It does something to me.
Makes me want to give her anything, everything she needs. Makes me want to—
A tiny squawk stops us cold. My mouth is frozen over the silky length of her neck, one hand gripping the generous curve of her ass, the other cupping her breast. Her fingers are knotted in my hair, her body arched into mine.
Our eyes meet.
Another little grunt sounds through the monitor, detonating the bubble we’ve been in. We jerk apart, straightening hair and clothes.
Fuck, what was I thinking?
Nora
Stupid, stupid, stupid!
Staring at the body-shaped smudge on our whiteboard wish list, I want to slap myself. Way to blur the lines in a relationship that should have been totally straightforward. And nothing like having a physical reminder that your actions have the potential to ruin carefully laid plans.
“It was just a kiss,” I breathe out, as Axel cruises back in, announcing, “Holy shit, that was some kiss.”
For an instant, the self-recrimination halts, and all I can do is stare in disbelief.
Otto’s tucked against his chest, rooting around against his shirt and making angry little noises that spur me to action, fixing a bottle for him.
Sure, now I’m thinking about Otto.
Axel slides into the counter space beside me. “But I’m sensing we’re in agreement that it was a mistake.”
“I feel like ‘mistake’ isn’t strong enough a word. God, what’s wrong with me?”
“Ehh, don’t beat yourself up, my pheromones are workhorses. We were caught up in a moment, and things got away from us. But only for a minute.” He catches my chin with the crook of his finger and tips my head so my eyes meet his. So I can see that even though he’s making light of the whole thing, he’s serious too. “We’re friends. This is no big deal.”
I swallow. “Right. Neither one of us is in a place for something like— like whatever that would have been.”
Axel nods. Then adds solemnly, “It would have been epic. I’m that good.”
I cough, shaking my head as he takes the bottle with a parting wink and walks Otto into the living room.
Turns out, Axel is not really a retreat-and-let-settle kind of guy, at least when it comes to errant kisses. I’d thought maybe after what happened, we’d take a step back from each other, but no.
And not only is Axel determined to keep our burgeoning friendship on the same track it was before, but he’s not about to let me sweep this kiss under the bed like some awkward secret between us either.
Nope. The man is relentless about “desensitizing the subject.” Which is why, when I walk into the living room the next morning to find him already up with Otto, he casts me a quick glance and deadpans, “No. I am not going to kiss you again. Stop begging me with your eyes.”
Said eyes give him a hard roll, but inside, I’m grateful.
Whatever this thing is with Axel, it means something to me. I don’t have many friends, and I’ve never had one like him. I don’t want things between us to change.
And apparently, neither does he.
Chapter 12
Axel
I’ve never been much for faking shit.
In school, I didn’t fake sick like some of the kids because being sick meant missing practice or a game. And I wasn’t one of those douchebags who faked more interest in women than they genuinely felt to try and get them into the sack— didn’t need to and was too busy trying to make sure they didn’t get the wrong idea anyway.
But as of this week, I’ve become the fakingest faker of all fucking time. Faking that I’m fine with what happened between us. Faking that I think it’s a laughing matter. Faking that I’m not thinking about it every damn night and too damn often during the day.
But there it is.
That kiss fucked me up.
It made me want more of something I can’t have.
And somehow it managed to make me even more protective of my relationship with Nora. The non-kissing part. Like I realized how precarious our whole situation is, how close I came to maybe losing her. Us. Because for a minute, I forgot I’m not in a place where kissing sexy, beautiful women is on the table.
I can’t let it happen again if I want to hold on to her after she moves out and moves on to a job that fulfills her the way she needs. And I do. So, I’m all about faking it till I make it.
The front door opens, and Nora comes in, unwrapping her scarf and hanging it on the coat tree by the door before doing the same with her jacket. “Was that your candidate from the agency I passed getting into the elevator?”
Her cheeks are rosy, and her curls look just a little wild, like the wind had some fun running its fingers through them.
Am I jealous of the wind?
Yes. Yes, I am.
But I’m faking that I’m not.
“Ex-candidate. Didn’t get a good vibe off her.”
She’d seemed stiff. Overly polite. And when I’d made a joke, she’d looked disturbed. Deeply.
Not a woman I’d be comfortable leaving Otto with for extended periods, and definitely not someone I’d be able to talk to through the video calls the way I do with Nora.
“The agency has two more candidates to send over, but not until I’m back next Tuesday.”
She bites her lip, a little divot between her brows.
“Hey, don’t worry. I’ll find someone before you need to leave. Otto will be okay. I’ve even gotten offers from a couple people from the Slayers if it comes down to it.”
It wouldn’t be ideal, but after four candidates who don’t measure up, I’m starting to wonder if maybe the only person who will is the one in front of me.
She looks uncomfortable but comes over to sit on the floor at the opposite side of Otto’s play mat.
“What’s on your mind?” I barely manage to cut myself off before adding beautiful at the end.
“Diane called today.”
“Yeah, how’s she?” Hopefully, riddled with guilt over the way she left Nora high and dry. “Still in love?”
“Madly,” she says wistfully. “She’s loving life in France and even has a plan to open a new business there.”
“Ha. Good luck to whomever she hires to help her.”
Nora smiles, watching me. Waiting.
It clicks, knocking the air out of me in a gust of words I don’t want to be true. “She wants you to help her?”
Her smile spreads and then falters. Like maybe she isn’t sure whether to let herself get excited. But finally, she gives in to it. And again, damn, I find myself struggling for air.
“She does. Only not until March. I wouldn’t live in their place this time either. But she has a friend whose roommate is moving out at the end of February. So, it’s kind of perfect.”