Her eyes are shut, but it doesn’t stop the tears from flowing. “Is that the picture of us at Christmas?” I ask.
Despite being my sister, Kenzie is a fucking knockout. But in the picture, her hair was frizzy, knotted up, and her glasses were so thick you couldn’t see her eyes clearly behind them. She was not pretty in that photograph, but last night I looked past all of it and remembered how she followed me around, just wanting to be close to me. And it broke my heart how a tragedy like ours finally made me see the extraordinary person she is.
“Yeah, it’s the Christmas when my grandparents came, and you were so mad.” She’s still not opened her eyes, but at least I have her speaking. “Man, I knew I could make you mad, but you were a whole new level of mad. And I tried to share with you, but…”
“Yeah, because every ten-year-old boy wants a Strawberry Shortcake, pink roller skates, and a Cinderella bedspread.” I remember, and I let out a long, strangled laugh. Those were just a fraction of what she had opened.
“Yeah, but I was thinking of you and how hurt I’d be if the tables were reversed.”
I remember that, too. “Yeah, I started off being an asshole pretty early, didn’t I?”
She opens her eyes, and her down-turned lips, supple lips at that, twist into a slight grin. “Um, I really feel like I’m walking into a trick question if I answer you.”
She lets the picture rest in her lap, and I look upon the memory of a Christmas we had with our parents, knowing this Christmas will be so very different.
“You were always good to me, Kenz, until I pushed you too far, and then you treated me like I’d died.”
I remember the day I pushed her too far, sharing her naked baby pictures with our entire class. And it’s a memory I don’t want to relive. From that point, I wouldn’t ever get the girl who used to follow me around with puppy dog eyes, begging me to be a part of her life.
“Yeah, you could have gotten an A plus in assholeness, River Hanson.”
Even in her remark, she’s not snotty or mean. There’s forgiveness in her tone, and when her hand connects with my own, I almost forget to breathe. I may be imagining it, but I think it’s the same for her, too, as a flush crawls onto her face when it’s nowhere near warm in my room.
“River, I promise you, if you allow me to, I’ll love you. I’ll make up for what we’ve both lost. I won’t let you be alone, but I have to trust you.”
How can she forgive this quickly? It makes my heart hurt, and only one person has broken my heart, up until Mom and Dad’s death. I can’t believe what I’ve missed right beside me—an amazing woman. And beautiful and sweet. And why the fuck are my eyes focused on her plump lips and everything I can do to them?
“River, are you listening to me?” Her voice is strained.
I squeeze her fingers, linked with my own hands, and tip her head to mine. “I can’t believe you’re willing to forgive me for everything I put you through, but I swear, Kenzie Hanson.” My lips are so close to hers, and I think she wants it as much as I do. Our lips even brush, briefly, as she pulls away. I don’t make a big deal of it and continue, “You’ll always have me near you, being your protection, like I should have done for all these years.”
She drops her head on my shoulder as we sit side by side. Looking straight ahead, I don’t know when I wake up, but I’m as uncomfortable as I’ve ever been. And to the right, peace covers me because Kenzie’s head is still on my shoulder, and I realize I’m home with her next to me.
Chapter 13
Isaiah
My before-dinner drink is waiting for me on the table, along with most of the Christmas items sitting in the room.
“Have the children been told dinner’s ready?” I’m having very impure thoughts about these children. Did I really call two eighteen year olds this?
With a swing of his gaze to me and in his impersonal tone, I won’t like what he’s about to tell me.
“Mr. Hanson had pizza delivered. They are in the dining room—stating it is a family tradition. Apparently, they continued to communicate that the three of you are decorating for the holidays.”
Charles’s speech is formal, rarely using contractions. He’s very British in his delivery, and part of me can’t help but laugh at River calling him Chuck. I can imagine his ashen complexion turning to a baby pink or crimson red at the remark.
“They further stated, they ordered enough for quote-unquote The fun sponge. And you can go and join them when you’re ready. But the cook made you your scheduled dinner, just in case.”
With the drink in my hand, I follow the sounds of laughter into the dining room, where both kids are smiling. “You were such an asshole. I thought Mom was going to lose her gourd with you. I sat back like I was eating popcorn, simply watching the show.”
Kenzie’s voice is elevated, and there’s humor lacing her words, but it’s not a dig toward her brother. And there again lies the problem; the idea of the two of them together has my raging monster straining against my pants. They’re siblings, grew up together, but while I imagine her plump lips wrapped around my cock, it’s only with River tasting her pussy.
River’s eyes avert to my own. “See, I told Kenzie you were too uppity to eat pizza with us. Hell, do you even know what pizza is, old man?”
The little fucker has gone from his anger at me to a simple joke.
“I’ll have you know…” I pull for a slice of the pepperoni, cheese oozing from the side, to an extra plate I hope they placed out just for me. “Your dad, and Kenzie’s mom, and I lived on pizza throughout college, along with ramen noodles.”
“But your uppity ass probably hasn’t had that shit in years.” Man, this kid is a dick, a cocky and adorable dickhead.
“I’ll plead the fifth to your question, smartass.” Pulling out the seat, I plop into it, taking the first bite. It has to have been easily a year since I’ve had the wonderful pie of all carbs. “It was mainly for health reasons, my choices of organic and whole foods.”
“Health, like working out.” I won’t go into my health issues, not tonight, and certainly not with these two who pull at my conflicting emotions.
“Yeah, that’s right.” I leave it be. They don’t need to worry more about it. “So, both of you aren’t mad at me anymore?” I have an almost jovial optimism with my question.
Kenzie turns her attention to River, then back at me. “I can’t speak for Kenzie,” he begins as he’s awarded a ruby red smile from the good girl in the room. Fuck, I’m a goner for her. “Don’t worry, we’ll go back to mortal enemies tomorrow, but for tonight, it’s about paying homage to our parents. And as much as you’re a thorn in our side, we know you were like a brother to Dad. Even Mom cared for your mopey, asshole ways.”
He’s said it perfectly, and there’s no malice in his voice. “Alright, a truce for the night and back to being a fucker tomorrow. And I’m speaking for you, not me.” I look at the drink in Kenzie’s glass. “Um, what are you two drinking?”
Kenzie begins to laugh, this time a bit more animated, and it’s when I notice her glass of Coke appears a little lighter, and there’s no ice. I’m reminded of how I should most likely lock the liquor up now.