“Poppy, sorry. I just have so much going on,” she apologizes for almost walking right past me.
“No worries. I wanted to thank you for what you did for Declan and Logan,” I say and give her a half hug since she’s carrying a lot.
“I didn’t do much. Dr. Steele and Mr. Davis were the kind ones,” she says.
“You got everything together and it was so amazing of you,” I say.
Her cheeks flush. “Oh! I’m actually glad I bumped into you. Rebel and Wolfe are coming to town for Thanksgiving. Cole and I host everyone at our place if you’d like to come.”
“Thanks, but I’m pretty sure Ryse and me are heading home,” I say.
“Okay, well after the weekend there’s a little party planned. Rebel doesn’t know anything so don’t mention it, but Wolfe is going to propose at The Firken.”
“That’s super exciting. Sure, I’d love to come. Wait, but Declan will be there. That’s probably not a good idea,” I say, feeling deflated. I really like Declan, maybe even love him, but being together is so hard.
“You should come. Paris, Blossom, and Cait, Wolfe’s sister, will be there too. You didn’t meet her on our last girls’ night but she usually hangs with us and she’s really sweet. You’ll love her,” she says. “You totally don’t need to go near Declan and you shouldn’t have to miss out.”
“You have a point,” I say, biting my lip while pondering if it’s a good idea.
“Blossom, Cait, and Paris will be there with no dates, so I mean you can always hang with them and no one would be the wiser,” she pushes some more, clearly reading my indecision.
“You’re right. I’d love to come.”
“Cool. I’ll text the info. Gotta run. Late for a class,” she says.
“Sure. Thanks, Holland,” I say. For now she seems to be my only real friend on campus.
Holland runs off and I head to my dorm.
Declan was being very vague but specific too. He said we are going out for a night on the town, so I head straight for the shower. I wash my hair and shave my legs and bikini line, but as I’m shaving my bikini line I decide to take off a little more than usual, and then a little more so all that is left is a strip of hair.
I wrap a towel around me and pick up the blow dryer. Bonnie was really good at giving me a blowout with curls and I try to match what she did. With my long, thick hair it takes me close to an hour but I’m pleased with the results. Next, I stand in front of my closet. Not that there is much to choose from. What does a night on the town mean anyway? Are we going for dinner? Dancing? I choose a long sleeve, bodycon dress I got on sale and of course I match it with my Doc Martens for lack of a better option. Still I like the look, it’s edgy and inspires me to put on a little makeup too. I go for some black eyeliner on my lower lids and use a good amount of mascara on my lashes. The contrast of the dark liner and my light eyes almost makes my eyes look feline and I praise myself. I don’t need Bonnie’s help. I got this. I think back to my first week at this school and feel good about how far I’ve come. I’ve made some nice friends in Holland, Rebel, and Paris. I’ve gotten myself new clothes and I’m figuring out different styles I like. I’ve also put myself out there with Declan, which is something I’ve never done before. Sure, Ryse was around to chase away guys but I really didn’t put in an effort to meet any or be in a relationship. I wonder if I was scared. Maybe hesitant. After Dad left, Mom never really found anyone else. She focused on work, me, and Ryse and she always said we were enough for her but she must have been lonely or maybe terrified after Dad left and never looked back. I realize maybe on some level I was scared of putting myself out there too. With Declan things just happened. It’s like fate stepped in but I was also willing to be open to what was happening, and it’s made me happier and I feel better about myself.
Lastly, I put on a pair of pantyhose because it’s cold outside and I match everything with an olive-green cropped puffer jacket I picked up.
All in all, I’m happy with the results, and when Declan texts me that he is down the path, I grab my purse and leave with my head held high. I feel good about myself. That’s what’s important. I don’t need people like Bonnie in my life anyway.
As I walk down the path, I see Declan standing at the end. His hands tucked into the pockets of his dark jeans as he waits for me.
When I get closer, I hear him hiss, “You look gorgeous.” He pulls me into him then looks around thinking better of it. “Follow me,” he says, and I do but we walk a few feet apart until we reach a parking lot. We head over to Holland’s car.
He holds the door open for me and I get in. Still he keeps his hands to himself, but his gaze lingers on my legs and he bites his lower lip.
He walks around the car and gets into the driver’s side. “Good thing Holland and Cole trust me with the car.”
“Where are we going?” I ask.
“Into Boston for dinner,” he explains, and he puts the car into drive and we are off.
At the first red light that’s far enough from school, Declan turns to me. “You look stunning and I didn’t give you a proper hello.” His fingertips touch my cheek and he leans over and kisses me. His lips brush mine softly at first but that familiar tingle erupts inside me. I don’t know what he is feeling, but his hand moves to cup the back of my head and we deepen the kiss, our tongues coming out to play. My hand cups the back of his head and my fingers thread through his hair.
A horn blares. “Damn.” We pull apart realizing the light has turned green. “I could do that all night.”
I press my thighs together as I feel that familiar ache of wanting so much more with Declan.
“How was your day?” he asks as he threads his fingers with mine.
“Busy as usual. I bumped into Holland. She invited me to The Firken the Sunday after Thanksgiving,” I say and wait for his response.
“That’s probably a bad idea. Ryse will be there and I have to go,” he says.
I pull my hand out of his grasp. “So I should sit home while my friends go out?”
Declan exhales softly. “I don’t want you staying in, obviously. This is complicated.”
“I can hang out with the girls. I don’t need to be with you,” I say to him. I don’t mean for it to come out so clipped but it does.
“I didn’t mean it that way. Just the guys are on my case now that they know I had someone over. I can tell I’ve upset you somehow and that wasn’t my intention. I wanted us to have a good night.”
“Yeah, but look at us. We have to leave town to have a good night,” I say tightly.
“Do you want me to come out to your brother, because I will. I really like you, Poppy, and for the first time in my life I want to see where this goes between us. You’ve changed me and I can’t go back. I just don’t know how your brother will react and I have a lot riding on the line,” he says and his voice cracks.
“No, I don’t want you telling Ryse. At least not yet. And I get what you’re saying, I guess I’m just a little frustrated. Why can’t anything ever be easy for me?” I ask.
“Maybe when something is harder, when you have to fight for it, it means more,” Declan says and picks up my hand, kissing the back of it. “I don’t want to fight. I wanted us to enjoy each other tonight without prying eyes.”